He looked directly back at her, his eyes intense and melting her. The moment stretched forever until he finally said, ‘I s’pose I better be seeing Miss Edie.’
‘Right.’ Beth walked slowly to the living room and said, ‘Guess who?’
Edie sighed. ‘This has got to stop.’ She stood and brushed off her skirt and didn’t notice Beth follow her to the front door and stand just out of sight, where she could see and hear everything that passed between Edie and Theo.
Edie held onto the door jamb and looked at him. She wanted him to speak first because she didn’t trust herself to be strong. She had to finish it with him completely. Gracie was only six, and though she was growing well, she wasn’t out of the woods yet. ‘Seven,’ the doctor had said, ‘wait until she is seven.’ Gracie had no mother but her and Edie reminded herself of that over and over, and of the promise she had made in her notebook.
‘Where is the child?’ His voice was raspy and wavering, as if he was on the edge of something momentous.
‘Um, she’s with Papa, it’s her birthday.’
‘Hmm,’ he said. ‘I know.’
The silence between them was threadbare and it barely held them apart. She was sure she could touch his soul if she just let go of the door jamb.
‘You do love me, don’t you?’ he whispered finally.
She looked at him and saw all the hopes she had held in her heart six years ago. She took a deep breath and held up her chin and he saw her straightforward, no-nonsense manner that he loved.
She sighed with her whole body and scrambled inside herself for the words she needed. When she spoke it was barely above a whisper. Each word was painful and she could feel her insides bleeding.
‘For six years now I’ve tried to ignore you in church. I’ve tried not to think of you at your piano, or walking each Sunday to my home. When I’ve lain awake at night thinking of you I’ve tried not to think about whether or not you are awake and thinking of me. I’ve tried to ignore your weekly visits and the rose you always leave on the porch. I’ve tried to forget your cowlick and the hair that always flops onto your brow no matter how often you try to sweep it back. I’ve tried to forget that annoying little habit you have of scratching behind your ear. When you play the organ in church I try not to let the notes swim into my heart. But I failed. I have loved you, Theo. I will always love you,’ she said and she let out her breath and felt an enormous burden released from her.
She saw the leap in his eyes, she saw them fill with stars and his face burst into a smile.
Theo saw the love in her heart. This would be it. She would be his. Today would make all the other days, all the months and years he had waited worthwhile.
She started to speak again but he got in first.
‘My last rose,’ said Theo and he held it out to her. ‘I have waited six years — forever. Will you become mine Miss Edith Cottingham?’ He bent over and with a swirl of his arm that was almost a bow put the rose on the step.
She felt her legs give way and she clutched the door jamb even tighter to hold herself steady.
In the hallway, Beth put her face against the cold wall and fell into it.
Theo could feel the thin space between them disappear. It was pulling them together. Edie was going to fall through the door straight into his arms. Her eyes were filled with tears, her heart was crying out to him, he could hear it. He knew she loved him with the same love that had carried him through the last six years. It was a yearning that haunted them both. Her hands were white and shaking as they grasped the painted wood and he reached out and tenderly unclasped her hand, one slender finger at a time. He would set her free.
He held her free hand in his and clasped it tightly, he would never let it go. He reached over with his other hand and brushed a hair from her face, then slid his hand down her cheek to her shoulder and down her arm to her other hand. Edie was ready to plummet into him, she no longer had the strength to resist his love. He was taking her other hand safely in his when all of a sudden it was gone, and he looked down and saw the child had placed her hand in Edie’s. Gracie poked her face around Edie’s skirt and Edie pulled her other hand from his and clasped Gracie to her side.
‘I can’t,’ whispered Edie, a tear spilling down her cheek, the cheek he had just touched with all the tenderness he felt for her. He looked down at the child and she looked up and smiled at him.
An angel struck his heart and split it open. He staggered back from the step. ‘Ahh,’ he said. Why hadn’t he ever noticed before? He could only put it down to the fact he hadn’t wanted to see. But now he understood what bound Edie to the house. It was not that the child needed Edie; it was Edie who needed the child. The child was the very life of the house and would never be sent away, not to school, not to a nanny, not anywhere. If she was sent away the house would stop breathing and shrivel and die.
He knew a charm had just entered his soul and he found himself bending down and picking up the rose and handing it to Gracie. Still looking at Gracie’s lovely smile he said to Edie in a feeble voice that even he didn’t believe,
