‘So you thinkyou can just buy me off then? I’m not some kind of hired killer,you know; and anyway I’ve got enough on you to ruin you. It was youwho wanted to get rid of your mother, after all; it was all youridea anyway.’
Gemma knewshe’d have to ride things out for the time being but she was prettycertain that once he thought about the money and house he mightcalm down a little. After all, they weren’t married anyway and hadbeen together for less than two years. In fact she was being morethan generous when she thought about it. She decided it best not topoint out that she was in a much better position to ruin him thanthe other way around; or that she had made absolutely sure that allthe hard evidence, not to mention his impressive criminal record,would make it easy enough for her to have him put away for lifeagain, and with little chance of an early release this timearound.
She tried to pacifyhim.
‘Mark, wecould both do that to each other, but when you’ve thought about ityou’ll realise we can both do well enough from all of this. We canbe sensible about things. I just don’t feel the same way about youas you do about me, but that’s life.’
At least she avoidedsaying that they could still be friends.
Mark grabbedanother beer and went out to the garden. She heard him start hiscar up and reverse aggressively out on to the lane. He somehowmanaged to make his Escort sound in pain. That had been anothersource of his frustration too; an ageing Ford economy car hardlysuited his self-image and didn’t match up to her sports car.Anyway, him letting off steam was probably for the best, shethought; he could think it all through by himself. Mark wasn’t thetype to do anything stupid, she knew him well enough. He’d like herto think he was going to make some massive gesture but wouldprobably just go and have a few drinks at their local and feelsorry for himself. She poured herself a glass of wine and felt anodd sense of relief, almost a glow. That was the worst of it over.No doubt he’d sulk around for ages and even come back and pleadwith her for them to stay together; but once that had failed shereckoned that he’d probably try and get as much as he could fromher, and that might make it all the easier to handle. For a momentGemma wondered if she really did know him quite as well as shethought; and if there was perhaps something she might not havetaken account of. She couldn’t be bothered to dwell on that at themoment, though.
Gemma knew there wasno going back – it had been what people called an epiphanousmoment. The sense of unburdening felt quite overwhelming and a partof her wanted to tell someone, Rebecca perhaps, but she resistedcalling her, out of an odd sense of loyalty almost, as if themoment was hers and shouldn’t be shared just yet at least. There’dbe plenty of time to let her friends know and to get on with thepracticalities of moving away.
Wednesday 20 October1982
The last fewweeks had been awkward. Mark had been in a deep sulk and Gemma hadtried to be matter of fact about it. He’d had a real go the otherevening, accusing her of abandoning him and, with over threemillion unemployed, plus his criminal record, bemoaning the factthat he would hardly be able to present himself as a top prospectto future employers. She’d done her best to convince him that he’dbe fine by himself, he’d soon find someone else and that he couldsell what would soon be his house in Petworth and then have enoughto start off anywhere he fancied.
Of course, shedid feel a little guilty; after all, she had used him to help sortthings out and to pay her mother back and help draw a line underher father’s death, but then she had made sure he had done wellenough from it all too. Bloody hell, she had even let him have sexwith her a couple of times over the last few days. He’d always beena bit shallow in that respect and anyway that wasn’t the reason shedidn’t want to stay with him. Now she just wanted to make sure thatthe move to London and the start of her new life went as smoothlyas possible. Things had moved pretty quickly in that respect and,with a bit of luck, she’d have the flat she was in the process ofbuying finalised within a few weeks and certainly by the end ofNovember at the latest. To keep him reasonably happy andacknowledging his hubristic tendencies, she’d promised Mark they’dkeep in touch, but hoped he wouldn’t be bothered to keep her to it.Much to her relief he’d not mentioned her mother again; Gemmareckoned he’d have worked out that any threats he might make to herwouldn’t match what she had on him, and she was thankful she hadn’tactually had to spell it out. Thinking about it, she was stillrather surprised he’d kept quiet about the poisoning andparticularly about her role in it all. She hadn’t let herself dwellon the momentary flicker of doubt, the brief thought that he mighthave something up his sleeve; nonetheless it was a little odd hehadn’t gone on and on about how hard done to he felt.
Finding anapartment had turned out to have been easier than she thought.Rebecca and Victoria had been a great help and eventually she’dgone for a smart two-bedroom apartment in Holland Park Gardens,just across Holland Park Avenue from their place; and with theowner wanting a quick sale and her being a cash buyer there’d beenno problems. In the end Gemma had got it for just over £75,000, agood few thousand less than she was budgeting for; the exchange ofcontracts was due soon and it seemed she could be in well in timefor Christmas. Last weekend had convinced Gemma that she was doingthe right thing. She had gone up on the Friday and stayed atVictoria and Rebecca’s.
