He spun around and faced me. His eyes were wide with wicked black pupils.
“You have no roots, no sense of security, no understanding of who you are. You’reflighty, anxious, detached, and ready to fuck any man who shows you any kind ofattention,” he spat.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” I protested backing away and huddlinginto a corner.
“You’re afraid of your emotions because you can’t fucking control them. You’re likea drug fiend, totally dependent on others, sitting around doe-eyed and pitifully waiting forsomeone to give you a free hit,” he said grabbing my arm and forcing me to look at him.
“Get off me,” I hissed.
“If not, then why are you here, Luisa? Your gut is screaming that all of this shit iswrong. This is not you. This is not where you belong. But you stay, because you thinkthat Maria is going to show you some love,” he said while releasing my arm.
I bumped into the corner, slid down the wall, buried my head in my hands and beganto weep. His words ate away at my very core, nicking off the façade that I had created formyself over the years. Every one of his words hit me like a stone, piercing off flesh like aslow form of execution. It was torture. Suddenly, I wished that I hadn’t left home. Iwould have much rather have stayed in Sister Abigail’s house, alone, keeping all of myemotions bottled up so no one could see them, so no bruja could use them against me.
I felt a hand caressing my hair.
“Oh Mi Amor. I didn’t mean to make you cry. I just want you to be tough,” he said.
I lifted my head and wipe my eyes. I never felt so alone before in my entire life.
“You got to be tough, because in this world you either fuck or get fucked,” he said.
“I don’t know what to do,” I said between my sobs. “Trust me,” he said.
He lifted my chin up and looked me in the eye. Then he grabbed my hands andhelped me to stand up again. “I can help you,” he said reassuringly.
I broke down again, but this time I flung my arms around his shoulders and allowedhim to hold me. I needed him. I needed some kind of human connection because I neededto feel something, anything to take away the emptiness that was inside of me.
Alijondro drove me home, and I was happy that I had made at least one friend. Iknew that God was looking over me and had sent him as my guardian angel. I had all ofthe intentions of walking into Maria’s house and confronting her about using me, aboutlying to me. I was at the point where I had lost all respect for her. I vowed that I wouldnever be like her. I would never let a man turn me into a madwoman.
“I am going to just wait out here.” Alijondro said.
“No. I need you by my side when I do this,” I said, pulling him through the door.
I entered the house and it was empty. Where did everybody go? I took a couple ofsteps into the living room. I felt my way through the room, fumbling around, caressingthe walls, and trying to find a light switch. When suddenly, light flooded the room. Isquinted and looked around.
“Alijondro?” I said.
I couldn’t see him. It took me a while to adjust to the lighting, but there wereshadows everywhere. There was one lingering behind me. I gasped and took a couple ofsteps back. I caught a glimpse of a frameless picture of Jesus pinned up over the diningroom table.
Nelly, I swear, I thought that I was going crazy. He was looking at me. I blinked acouple of times and focused and realized that he wasn’t looking at me, but behind me.His eyes widen with fear as if He was warning me to run. I bumped into someone whowas standing right behind me.
He reached out and put me into a chokehold, as he leaned in close to my ear andwhispered. “Welcome home bitch.”
My eyes were popping out of my sockets; I could feel the steel from the knifestroking my jugular vein.
There was a black hand that was clamped below my neck. It inched downward andbegan to fondle my breast. I could see the darken knuckles and the fingernails that looklike coiled shells. There was a copper ring disguising itself as gold on his right pinkyfinger. His other hand crept out with the blade and slit across my breast. My kneesbuckled and I fell to the ground. The blood was gushing out of my chest; the pain was sointense that it made me dizzy. I felt like I was standing on a spinning disk at a fun house.I tried to regain my bearings, but I found myself being pulled around by some kind ofcentrifugal force.
I smashed into walls. In my stupor I knocked a vase off a table; it fell to the ground,breaking into a dozen pieces. Its contents rose like a baneful cloud of black smoke. Ihobbled over to the center of the room and threw myself down on the floor. The roomseemed to be turning. I looked up and saw a figure looming above me.
“Alijondro.” I yelled pleadingly. I couldn’t understand why he was doing this to me.
He reached down and fondled my breast, buttocks and thighs. He stood up andsimpered with glee when he saw that it was stained with my blood. He hungrily licked itoff of his fingers and then pushed me back to the ground. I looked down and saw a loafershoe holding down my chest.
“Don’t try and resist me, Luisa.” His voice sounded strange, like he was screaming atme through a tunnel.
He released his foot. And I started to shake from fear. He kneeled down andstraddled me.
