I pushed open the door and stepped out on to the porch. He looked different, but not better. I didn’t see the seething resentment, but the pain was there. I let out a small cry that I was the source of it.
Thinking he had to be here for Alyssa, I said, “Alyssa is at the movies with my parents.”
He nodded. “Good. I’m here to see you.”
Again, hope bloomed even though it was crazy to think he would forgive me. He gave a nod, indicating he wanted to walk and talk. I was all for that because I wasn’t sure I’d be able to hold it together if I kept looking at his pain.
I walked down the steps with him and toward the back of the house. We were heading to the old oak tree. Did this mean we were going back to the beginning to start over? Or perhaps he thought going back to the beginning was the best way to end it.
“Do you think this is where it happened?” he asked as he looked up at the oak tree. “Alyssa?”
I nodded. “Yes.”
All significant events in our relationship happened here and I was terrified it was all about to end.
“I wish I’d known. I’m sorry about that.” He let out a frustrated growl. “I missed so much.”
I wanted to soothe him, but didn’t know how.
“I won’t miss anything now. I promise.”
“I know you won’t,” I said. I wanted to ask him why he was here, but was terrified of the answer. Then I realized he wasn’t acting angry and so now was my time to tell him how sorry I was. “Wyatt?”
“Hmm?” He’d been looking out over the moonlit river, but turned to me.
“I hate myself for hurting you. Honestly, I do.”
He looked down.
“I felt terrible even as I was doing it. You were so wonderful with Alyssa. And Ryder kept telling me you had a right to know.”
“You didn’t think I did?” His voice was calm, but I could still hear the hurt.
“I knew you did. The reasons I had for keeping the secret don’t make sense now, even to me.”
“You were thinking of Alyssa. You were afraid I’d abandon her too, like I did to you.”
I blew out a breath. “Yes and no. I knew if I’d been able to find you and tell you I was pregnant, you’d have come home, so it was wrong to think you’d leave her-”
“And yet...”
“I worried about what would happen if Stark won. You left before. I guess I was just projecting my own hurt and fear. It was wrong.”
He studied me. “I’m not leaving. Ever. Or if I do, I won’t be going alone.”
Did that mean he’d take me and Alyssa with him, or just Alyssa? My heart raced in fear that he’d take her away from me.
He inhaled a breath and looked out over the water again. “We started here.”
“Yes.”
“We made a child. We had plans.”
“Yes.” I so desperately wanted to reach out to him, but didn’t feel I had the right to.
“Things didn’t quite go to plan.”
My heart sank. “I guess not.”
“I think it’s time we let those plans go, don’t you think? As you once said, we’re not infatuated high school kids.”
I looked down, struggling to keep from crying. With effort I lifted my gaze to him. “No, we’re not. But I do love you, Wyatt.”
His breath hitched and emotion swam in his eyes. “Maybe it’s time to make a new plan.”
My heart stopped as I waited in anticipation for what he meant.
“You hurt me, Sinclair-”
“I know, and I’m so sorr-”
“But I hurt you too. I hurt you and Ryder and you both forgave me. You didn’t even have to think about it.”
I bit my lip. “Ryder didn’t have to think about it. Me? I was wary, but how could I not love you again…still?”
His lips twitched upward slightly.
I took a chance. “Can you forgive me, Wyatt? Or at least tell me what I need to do to make it up to you?”
He nodded. “I forgive you.”
For the first time since he found out about Alyssa, the anvil on my heart lightened. “Where does that leave us?” I held my breath as I waited for his response.
“I don’t know. I can only tell you what I don’t want.”
I wasn’t sure how much more of the emotional roller coaster my heart could take.
“I don’t want a fake marriage, Sinclair. I want a real wife and family. I want what we planned here ten years before but not some fantasy. Life is hard. There are fuckers out there who want to hurt us. But we’re older, we’re stronger, and if we’re in it together, we can make it.”
“Oh God, Wyatt. I want that too. I want it so bad.” I couldn’t stop myself from launching my body into his arms. Thank God he wrapped me up and pulled me close.
“I love you, Sinclair. That never stopped. Not even when you broke my heart.”
I was crying as I clung to him. “I’ll make it up to you. I promise.”
He lifted his head and cradled my face in his hands. “I’ll make it up to you too. I have ten years to fix with you and Alyssa, and I plan to fix every one of them.”
I felt giddy with happiness. His lips pressed to mine and finally, after breaking my own heart with my deception, I felt my heart start to heal. I clung to him, pouring all my love into the kiss. I trailed kisses over his face and neck and chanted how much I loved him.
“Shall we seal the deal?” he asked, his wicked grin at full wattage.
“It’s required.” I said, already shoving his t-shirt over his head.
Our hands were a whirl of activity as we yanked and pulled clothes off. His dick sprang out and I wanted to drop to my knees and give him the blow job of a lifetime. But he
