Harley Micheals was the return sender.
My hands shook as I gripped the envelope. I wanted to respect his privacy, to believe that whatever this envelope held was completely innocent. Only I looked at the postmarked date and found that it was sent to him after he and I had begun to date.
And my world crashed when I lifted the edge and the contents slid from inside and pooled on the dresser top before me.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Rhett
“AJ,” I hollered out as I entered the quiet space. When she didn’t respond, I figured she must have fallen asleep. I placed dinner on the counter and the single rose I’d grabbed as I passed my mother’s garden on my way up.
“Babe?” I said hesitantly as I walked down the hallway toward my room and froze as I stepped through the doorway. AJ sat on the bed, looking at a pile of photographs and what appeared to be letters. I had two choices here—I could play stupid, or I could admit that I already knew what it was she’d found.
“When were you planning to tell me?” AJ didn’t even look up, only reached out and picked up one of the photographs. My chest felt unbelievably tight, and breathing was even growing difficult.
“I was gonna tell you last night, but—” I paused when she finally lifted her head to look at me. “You were already so upset about your mother, and then Mikey was here this morning.”
I’d recognized the look on her face immediately. It was the same look she got when she was less than impressed.
“So this is my fault.” She lifted her hand and shook the photo she still held. “What about the past months? Because that’s how long you’ve had all these sweet little love notes from Harley. What about all those times, Rhett? You have had more than enough times to be honest with me.”
“I didn’t feel it necessary to give you more doubt. Those things are nothing.” I pointed toward the bed.
Suddenly AJ stood and used her hand to sweep across the comforter, making all the photos and letters go sailing through the air. “You’re wrong. They are something. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have kept them, you wouldn’t have hid them in your drawer so that you could reminisce.”
I stepped toward her and she held up her hand to stop me. “I had to hear it from your sister when it should have been from you.”
She hung her head, letting her arms hang loosely at her sides. I could see her shoulders rising and falling as she took one deep breath after another. “I was gonna tell you tonight.”
I wanted to reach for her. I wanted to hold her in my arms and assure her that Harley being here meant nothing.
“I should have listened to myself in the beginning. Because I think I always knew that this would happen.” A panicked feeling sucker-punched me. “She was your first love, and she’ll always have that special place in your heart.”
“AJ.” I stepped forward again, and when she tried to hold me off I ignored her movement. I wrapped my arms around her tightly and pulled her body to mine. “Let me explain.” It was something I should have done long ago, but I guess somewhere in my mind I’d thought if I ignored it, it would all disappear. Now there was a strong chance that Harley would be back in this area for good, and I couldn’t ignore this fear anymore.
“I think I need to go home, Rhett.” AJ pushed against my chest, and I just held her tighter. “Let me go.”
“No.” She had to be crazy if she thought that would be all it took for me to step aside. “Her being here changes nothing.” I leaned back and cupped her face in my hands, forcing her to look at me. “We are still us, and that isn’t gonna change.”
For a second that hardened look in her eyes softened and she lifted her hands to fist my shirt.
“I love you, AJ,” I confessed, still feeling panicked that I was about to lose her. “I’m begging you not to go, damn it. AJ, I need you. I need you and only you. Stay and talk to me, please, baby, please.”
“All those letters she wrote, the cards she sent…” The sadness in her voice squeezed my heart and literally made it ache. “If she doesn’t mean anything anymore, then why did you keep them?”
She lifted her hands to cover my own that still firmly held her face. She leaned into my touch and turned her head just enough to press a soft kiss to my palm. Then carefully she pulled my hands from her face, still holding them in hers.
“I think that you did a really good job convincing yourself that what you felt for her, you no longer felt.” I shook my head. “You need to decide what you want. What you truly want, Rhett, because I can’t live with this doubt in my mind. It was always a fear I had. And I’ll admit I let it go, but now I’m not so sure.”
Those moments in life when you feel like your life is moving on all around you, yet you are stuck, frozen in one single second—that’s where I was. It was like I couldn’t fucking move or speak. So many things racing through my mind—anger, frustration, hell,
