Little shit was always doing whatever he could to get me back for all the shit I pulled over on him. “Remind me to thank him for that later.” By thank him, I meant knock him around a little bit to express my overwhelming gratitude.
“You mind telling me what’s going on?” You don’t want to know, believe me. “You’ve been moving around here all day with a chip on your shoulder. You got something you wanna talk about?”
“I’m good.” I kicked the ground at my feet. “Not sleeping much.” It was true, but not for the reasons he was probably thinking.
“Do you know how hard it was for your momma and me, hell, even Garrett, when you were gone? I know it was even rougher on you, but we were here every day moving through our days, feeling your absence. Sometimes I’d find your mother just sitting in your room staring at your bedding as she carefully ran her hand over the worn-out quilt on your bed.” I stopped pacing just to stare at him. “A parent wants nothing more than to protect their children. It doesn’t matter their age. We want to make things right, take away the pain, and while you were thousands of miles away, one of the hardest things was the fact that we couldn’t even attempt to correct any wrongs.”
I wasn’t sure what was going on, so fixing this would prove to be extremely difficult.
“Something’s brewing inside of you, son. It has been for some time now. You’re not yourself, and my first instinct is to make it right.” No one could make this right. “I have a feeling I know what’s going on, but I can’t help unless you talk to me.”
“Even if you knew, you couldn’t help.”
“Don’t underestimate me.” I met his penetrating stare once more to find him grinning at me. “I fought through some pretty difficult times to get to Maria, and then again when we saw you and knew that you belonged with us.” My chest ached with respect for him and for my mother. “Love isn’t always easy.” I felt my pulse quicken. “It’s damn hard on most days, but if you find that one, the person you know without a doubt in your mind belongs at your side, then you push through the rough times. You don’t let anyone tell you that it’s not worth it, because like I said, loving someone is difficult. It’s exhausting, even.”
There was no way he could know. Could he?
“The two of you have been walking on eggshells for days.” Oh, fuck. “I’m not the only one that’s noticed the difference, Mikey.” I always felt like a little kid all over again every time he called me that. “Just talk to her, face what’s going on, and together, decide where to go from there. Everything else will fall into place after that.”
“I tried,” I caved, feeling overwhelmed. I didn’t plan to but looking up to see my father staring back at me, I couldn’t control it any longer. “She said there was nothing there.”
“And you believe her?”
“No,” I added with a laugh that had nothing to do with humor. “I showed up at her place to talk, and all she did was tell me I should take Raven out. Told me that she liked me and all kinds of other bullshit, trying to direct me away from herself.”
I took in a deep breath, feeling like I was about to spin out of control once more.
“Maybe she’s right.” I fisted my hair with one hand. “It’s too complicated and better off left alone.”
My father crossed his arms over his chest but said nothing. It was something he always did while I was growing up. He did that with Garrett, too. He never talked for us, never pushed us to go down one path or another; he only listened. He took it all in, nodded on occasion, or scowled when he heard something he didn’t much like but never forced us to make one choice over the other. He was always there but let us be the ones to decide which route best suited us.
“I don’t want things to change between Maddison and me, but I’m afraid they already have.” With that, he simply nodded his head and stepped closer to pat me on the shoulder as I walked on by with purpose, knowing exactly what needed to be done.
As we emerged from the side of the house, I immediately started to seek her out. It didn’t take long to find her. The beauty of her stood out even when she was attempting to hide. She sat at one of the picnic tables, with Raven at her side and Grace and Chloe opposite her. She used her fork to move the food around on her plate but never actually took a bite.
My feet began to move as I bypassed everyone and stepped in behind her. I watched as her back and shoulders tensed, causing her to sit up a little taller when she sensed my presence. “Go away.” She whispered the words without even turning around.
All the others at the table slowly looked up, shifting their gaze between Maddison and me. Raven wrinkled her brows in confusion, and all of this should have stopped me, but my impulses were too strong. A desperation to make things right, the need to see her smile, it was all overpowering me.
“Will you please just give me five minutes?” I should have cared that I was gaining an audience, but all I could feel was the need to have her look at me and now see the same sadness I heard in her voice. I had to fix this. “If you want me to leave you alone after that, I will.”
“I want
