Elizabeth silently thanked the powers that bewhen Teddy and Sydney found some friends to play with and amusedthemselves while Elizabeth served her hour volunteer duty. She evenmanaged to make some small chit-chat with Nancy in betweencustomers. Elizabeth was a hard and efficient worker, and she hopedthat her effort tonight was appreciated. It would have been so mucheasier to blow off the book fair, especially in light of herupcoming trip.
CHAPTER THREE: October 15,2010
Elizabeth could just tell it was going to beone of those days. You know the kind, where anything that can gowrong will. She knew, before her feet even hit the ground in themorning that she would be yelling at the kids, would burst intotears, would wear quitter socks, and would have a bad hair day. Shecould just feel it in her bones. It seemed like she had this kindof day at least five days out of seven lately. It was her new norm.Her first indication of her type of day was that Teddy was yellingnonsense noises at the cat in a high-pitched squealing voice. Itwas 6:02 a.m. The high-pitched squeal had not only woken her, butnow had woken Sydney, who was screaming at her brother to stop. Heralarm blared on to a burst of static. She sighed, tuned the radioto a station (when will the kids listen to her and stop playingwith her radio?), and turned it off. She took a slight ounce ofpleasure with the turning off of the whole alarm, not justsilencing the radio. It was a very small act on Friday morningsthat signified the weekend was near, and some rest would be coming.She knew if she could make it through the next few hours, that shewould get some rest, and hopefully sort out her life. She knew thatsomething had to change; she could not keep going as shewas.
The kids bounded into the room and onto thebed. She turned the morning news on, trying to doze for a fewminutes more. She had been up a few times with Sydney during thenight, and of course, was awake from 3 to 4 a.m. with her mindracing, as per usual. She could not remember the last time she hadslept uninterrupted for more than five to six hours, nor could sheremember a day without anxiety and burning in her chest. It wasgetting worse and worse. Finally, at 6:40 a.m., Elizabeth got upand made her way to the bathroom to shower. The kids weredispatched to their own rooms to begin getting ready. Elizabethdoubted that they would complete the task, but it at least keptthem from horsing around while she was in the shower.Absentmindedly, Elizabeth let the hot water beat down on her backas she balanced on one leg. If nothing else, Elizabeth was acreature of habit and predictable, and on Friday mornings, sheshaved her legs. Not that it really mattered. It was not like shewould be seeing Peter this weekend. Even if he were around, henever bothered to caress or even notice her legs anymore. Elizabethpushed that line of thought down deep and tried to think aboutother things. She had had enough of those thoughts at 3a.m.
Friday mornings were the hardest morning to getthrough. She was so burnt out by the end of the week. This one,even more so. The last ten days were eating away at her, just asher constantly churning stomach acid seemed to be tearing a hole inher chest. She emerged from the bathroom, yelled down the hall tothe kids to stop wrestling, and stared at the large pile ofunfolded laundry that occupied the floor by the foot of her bed.Since Peter had been away, she had really let the laundry go. Hewould not tolerate this kind of mess. She sighed and looked at theclock. It was going to be tight to get the kids to school on timeat this rate. Elizabeth started to rummage through the laundry,looking for underwear. She decided she didn't have the time andquickly turned to her dresser. Elizabeth often justified a pile oflaundry by saying that she was being more efficient by skipping thefolding and putting away step. Sometimes (most days), it really didjust make her life more chaotic. Today, in her hurry, she pulledthe first pair of underwear from her drawer, barely noticing thatthey were black low-cut bikinis that she normally saved for aspecial occasion. All of her every day, comfortable (meaning grannypanties) underwear must have been in the laundry pile. Shit. Shegrabbed a black bra with lace trim and a pair of jeans that werelying on the top of the pile of clean clothes. She loved thatFridays meant she could wear jeans to work. She went to the closet,grabbed the first camisole she could find and layered on top of ither comfortable gray long sleeve t-shirt. It was faded andshapeless, and hung off her newly thinned frame. Elizabeth didn'tnotice that the shirt was unflattering. Her jeans hung off her aswell. Even fully dressed, she did not look put together. She lookedslovenly and worn out, like her clothing. She could not manage tofind matching black socks, so she decided to wear her Nubuck clogswithout socks, despite the weather report of an incoming coldfront. At least her socks wouldn't be quitters.
Elizabeth checked on the kids. Sydney wasdressed and just brushing her teeth. Teddy was in his room, puttingtogether Legos, with his pajamas strewn about the room, and he wasin his underwear only. Elizabeth took a deep breath, tried not toyell, and reminded him, "Go to the bathroom, get
