She believed him, but there was still a small part of her that would automatically panic. Closing her eyes, she prayed for strength to make it over this hurdle. It was important for their marriage.
She rose and extended her hand to him. He clasped hers and came to his feet. She faced him with only inches between them, so close their breaths merged.
“Why don’t you get ready for bed first? I’ll be along later. I want to check on the kids. Mindy’s never camped out before.”
Another stone in the wall around her heart crumbled. Sometimes she felt as though he could read her mind. The connection was disconcerting. “She’ll be fine. Ashley will look out for her.”
While she made her way to the bathroom, Slade left the house. She prepared for bed in less than fifteen minutes. By the time Slade came into the room, she was under the covers with the sheet pulled up to her chin. Since they had moved his clothing into her bedroom, he gathered his pajamas and headed for the bathroom, switching off the overhead light as he exited. All that lit the room were the slits of moonlight streaming through the slats in the blinds.
Tory clutched the sheet and stared at the dark ceiling. Her heart hammered against her chest while her pulse raced through her. An eternity later Slade reentered the bedroom, obviously feeling his way to the bed. She heard him crash into the nightstand and started to turn on the lamp on the table by her. Before she could, Slade eased down onto the mattress next to her.
“Good night, Tory.” He rolled over onto his side away from her.
“Night,” she managed to say.
Slade was her husband.
Slade was a good man and a wonderful father.
She trusted Slade.
Slowly her heartbeat returned to its normal pace and she released her death grip on the sheet. Slowly her muscles relaxed and her eyelids drooped. Sleep crept over her and she sank into the world of dreams.
* * *
Something hit his arm. A moan pierced his sleep-drenched mind. Slade’s eyes bolted open.
Another moan sounded in the silence of the house. Tory twisted, kicking out at him. Pain shot up his leg. He scrambled away from her and came off the bed, reaching for the lamp.
“Don’t. Please.”
For a few seconds he halted his movements, thinking she was awake and knew he was going to turn on the light. But looking at Tory thrashing on the bed confirmed what he’d originally thought. She was asleep, caught in a nightmare. Flicking on the lamp, he blinked at the sudden brightness while Tory bolted straight up in bed, terror on her face.
CHAPTER TEN
Tory jerked the sheet up, gripping it in her fists. The sound of her heartbeat thundered in her ears. She knew Slade was speaking because his mouth moved, but for a few seconds she couldn’t hear what he was saying. The suffocating compression around her chest threatened her next breaths. Pulling air into her lungs, she scooted back against the headboard.
“Tory? Are you all right?” Slade sat on the mattress, reaching out toward her.
She nodded, evading his touch to stand on the other side of the bed. Snatching up her robe, she stuffed her arms into the terry-cloth sleeves and belted it. The double-size mattress separated them, but it wasn’t far enough away for Tory.
Flashes of her nightmare clung to her mind. The fear. The pain. The humiliation. Her body shook with the memories of four years ago—of the nightmare that plagued her when she allowed her fear to grow.
The concern on Slade’s face tore further at her fragile composure. She wanted to reassure him she was all right, but she couldn’t get words past the constriction in her throat. Again she forced herself to inhale deeply until the crashing of her heart against her rib cage subsided.
When he started to round the end of the bed, she held up her hand and managed to say, “I’m okay.”
Thankfully he stopped and studied her. If he had touched her, she was afraid she would have come unglued. She could still remember her assailant’s hands on her, and the memory left her feeling unclean. She needed to shower.
Glancing at the bedside clock, she sighed when she saw it was nearly five in the morning. “I’m getting up. It’s nearly time and I might as well get started on today’s chores before the carnival committee comes out here to set up for tomorrow.” Without waiting for him to say anything, she went to her closet and withdrew her clothes for the day.
As she crossed the room to the door, he finally said, “Tory, something frightened you. Do you want to talk about it?”
“No.” She opened the door and escaped out into the hall.
The click of the door as Tory closed it reverberated through the bedroom, the sound bouncing off the walls and striking him with its finality. Slade stared at the wooden barrier between him and his wife. Until just a few minutes ago he’d thought they had made progress in their relationship. The nightmare was the answer, but she had locked the door and thrown the key away.
* * *
Exhaustion cleaved to every part of her. Tory took a moment to sit and regroup before the next set of children arrived to ride the horses. Perspiration plastered strands of her hair to her face and neck. She ran a towel across her forehead and around her neck but that did little to relieve the heat of a summer’s day.
“Another hour and the carnival will be over,” Judy said as she sat down beside her on the bale of hay in the shade of the barn. “This has been a roaring success. Everyone says so. They particularly like the horse rides for the children and young at heart.”
The words her sister spoke barely registered on her numb mind. Tory closed her eyes and wished she could keep them closed for the
