“They’ll have it,” Colt said. “You’ll make sure of it.”
“Yeah.”
“And if you need anything, you’ll tell me,” he added.
“No, I wouldn’t do that,” she said quickly. “I can figure it out. Besides, with the money from the cattle, I’ll be able to provide.”
“I meant, if you need moral support,” he said. “It won’t be easy raising them on your own. Might be nice to have someone you can vent to.”
“You’re a busy man,” she said.
Colt stopped washing and turned toward her. “Look, if you don’t want my friendship, it’s okay. But I want you to know that if you ever feel overwhelmed, or just kind of lonely—”
“Loneliness seems to be my problem lately,” she said, cutting him off. “And it’s made me do some stupid things.”
“I thought we weren’t placing blame.” Those dark eyes met hers.
“We aren’t,” she said softly. “But we need to be more careful.”
“I agree with that,” Colt said, turning back to the washing. He rinsed another plate and put it into the sink. “I said before I wasn’t sorry about it, but with a few hours to kick myself, well, I do regret it.”
That was a relief. She couldn’t be the only one to feel bad, because that kiss had been too sweet, too honest. She’d wanted that kiss, and she couldn’t trust herself to turn down another one.
“I think we need to take a little bit of space from each other,” she said.
“Space.” His tone was hollow, and she couldn’t tell what he meant by repeating the word.
“It might make it easier to get things onto a more even footing,” she said.
“Jane, I don’t know what you’re worried about, but I’m not the kind of guy who would push himself on you. I’m sorry I kissed you. I shouldn’t have. But you don’t have to worry about me taking advantage, or—”
“It’s not you I’m worried about,” she said quickly. “It’s me. I liked it. More than I should have. And apparently, I’m more vulnerable right now than I thought. Trust me, Colt. I know you’re a good man, and I’m not afraid of you or anything. I don’t trust myself right now.”
“Oh,” he said quietly.
Just like she seemed to do with this man lately, she’d said too much. She felt the heat come to her cheeks again, and she inwardly grimaced. She didn’t need to tell him that. She could keep some dignity, at least! She dried another couple of plates, stacking them on the counter next to her.
“Hey, it’s me, too,” he said after a moment of silence. “I’m just as attracted to you. You’re gorgeous, and you don’t seem to know just how beautiful you are. It makes you...even more beautiful. But it isn’t just your looks, Jane. You’re sweet, wise, understanding... You’re a beautiful person, not just a beautiful woman, and apparently, that’s my weakness. Go figure. I’ve never stumbled across anyone just like you before. So, yeah. I get it. I’m attracted, too.”
She glanced up at him from the corner of her eye and caught him looking at her.
“I’m not sure that helps,” she said feebly.
“Oh. Well, the point I was trying to make was that you shouldn’t feel stupid or anything. I’m there, too. You’re not alone. And we both know what we can give—there’s no confusion there.”
“No, there isn’t,” she agreed, and a wave of sadness swept through her. Whatever she was feeling here had no future. She needed to quash it now, before she got hurt. Except it might be too late for that. Driving away from this ranch was going to be difficult.
“I mean, this much cowboy... I get that I’m hard to resist.” He grinned.
Jane laughed and smacked his muscular arm. “I’ll find a way, I’m sure.”
They both chuckled and Jane reached for another plate. They worked in silence together for a few minutes, their movements synchronized.
“I’m sorry that you have to sell that land because of me,” she said as Colt washed the last dish.
“Don’t be,” he said. “That land means something to me, but it’s in the past. Josh wasn’t coming home again. I know that. Some mistakes have permanent consequences.”
Some mistakes, like allowing herself to get emotionally involved with her late husband’s cousin. She didn’t want to ruin this friendship that had been developing. She needed a person in this family she could trust, who she could feel comfortable around when she brought her girls back to meet family from time to time.
Jane needed some calm, some stability and no more emotional burdens.
They’d shared a very mutual kiss, but if they were careful, they could put it behind them.
The next morning, Colt didn’t come back to the house for breakfast. He texted his aunt that he’d be eating in the canteen so that she wouldn’t waste her energy cooking up something big for him. But he was avoiding Jane. He could pretend that it wasn’t that big of a deal, but the truth was, he hadn’t kissed a woman in a few years, and that kiss had meant something to him.
It shouldn’t. He knew all the reasons why it would never work. She was Josh’s wife... She was looking for stability for those girls, not the mess that was left behind with Beau’s death. And no matter what he was feeling for her—emotions he didn’t dare name—he was supposed to be the strong one. Jane had been through the wringer already with a difficult marriage, losing Josh, raising twins on her own. Colt hadn’t been rattled around as much as she had. He’d been actively avoiding that wringer, but with her, all those walls and defenses he’d built up over the years seemed to crumble.
Midmorning, Colt got a call from the lawyer saying that the paperwork was ready that put the land into his name, and
