“Lucky you,” Bailey laughs.
“Yes, I would agree with you there.”
“Why were you even at that party? I never asked. Not really your scene.” Bailey says, taking a sip of water.
I roll my eyes. “I was there with Mike. That was the night I realized we really weren’t compatible.”
Bailey smirks. “I mean, we knew before that.”
“Yeah, but it was…really driven home that night.”
Our food is delivered, and we dig in, conversation lapsing in the face of amazing food. “And you’re still cool with Taylor?” I ask.
“Mostly,” she says with a shrug. “We don’t hang out that much anymore. She’s constantly with Melody and the other Tri Deltas. Practically already a part of the sorority.”
“Yeah.”
“I’m really sorry, Juno. I thought you knew and were trying to make it work. There’s no reason for the three of us to hang out together if she’s just hating you.”
“I don’t want to make it weird for you.”
She makes a dismissive noise. “It’s going to sound brutal, but I really don’t care that much. If I’m going to preserve one of the friendships, then it’s going to be yours.”
I laugh. “Love you.”
“Love you too.”
And that’s the way it goes. We catch up on all the things that we’ve missed while we’ve been buried in school, and she even manages to get more details out of me about Malcolm. But I don’t tell her about the way our relationship works. I’m not even ready to face that yet, let alone tell it to anyone. Even if that person is Bailey.
When we’re finished, I feel good. I’ve loved catching up with her, and we promise that we’re not going to let so much time pass again before hanging out.
Granite House is dark when I arrive. Which is strange. It’s not that late and it’s a Saturday night. Not only is it dark, it’s silent. Something is wrong. My gut knows it instantly. There’s still nothing on my phone from Malcolm, and this has something to do with it. What the hell is going on?
I enter the house and look around, but just like the outside, there’s no signs of life. A deep kind of terror and panic crawl up my throat. Did something bad happen? I need to talk to Mal, and I need him to tell me what’s happening and tell me that whatever it is is going to be fine. This isn’t nearly funny anymore.
Pulling out my phone, I call Malcolm, and I jump when his phone rings behind me. Down the hall. “Malcolm.”
I find him sitting on the stairs with a phone in his hand. There’s a glass bottle beside him, and when he speaks his voice is low and quiet like I’ve never heard before. “Here I am,” he says. “You found me.”
“Are you drunk?” I ask, rage suddenly filling me. I thought that he was different. That he understood who I was and what I stood for. Not once since I met him has he showed any interest in alcohol. Now this? Is there something darker that I don’t know about him?
He laughs. Dark and slow. “You know, Juno, I wish that I were drunk right now. I really do. But I keep my fucking promises, and so even though this bottle of whiskey is damn tempting, I’m stone cold sober.”
“Then what—”
“I’m tired. I’m pissed. I’m more miserable than I’ve ever been in my fucking life.”
I blink. What the fuck did I miss. “Oh my god, Malcolm, what happened?”
Taking a step forward he makes a sound that’s nearly a growl, and in the darkness surrounding the house, it’s terrifying. “Don’t you dare come closer to me,” he says. “You’re a fraud, and I wish that I had never met you.”
“What?” My head is spinning. I don’t have any idea what’s going on. Last night was perfect, and we haven’t spoken today. What changed? What happened? “I don’t understand.”
“You need to get out of this house, Juno.”
“Malcolm, please, talk to me. I don’t understand what’s happening.”
“Get. Out. Now.”
My heart is pounding and I’m dizzy. I feel like the ground is falling out from underneath me. “What about our deal. We agreed on a month. We’re not there yet.”
It’s a last-ditch effort to get him to tell me something, anything. But I already know that he won’t. Whatever this is, he’s decided.
“I don’t want you here. Anywhere near me.”
“Where do you want me to go, Malcolm? You brought me here. You forced me to give up my place on campus so that I would be yours. Your little toy. And now that you’ve gotten tired of me, you just want to throw me out onto the street?”
“I made a mistake,” he says, and he does sound tired. Exhausted. And in spite of the fact that he’s ripping out my heart, I want to wrap my arms around him and hold him. “I never should have let you into this house. You are nothing.”
The words take the air from my lungs.
Malcolm’s shoulders sag. “You can stay until you find a place to stay, but you have to get the hell out.”
Tears flood my eyes, it all hitting me at once. “You don’t have to tell me twice,” I say. I can’t walk past him and up to my room where we’ve spent time together. I can’t do it. I turn and walk out of the house into the night, and there’s only one place that I can think to go.
I can’t stop crying, and when Bailey opens her door, I’m a mess. She doesn’t even hesitate before pulling me inside and wrapping me in the tightest of hugs.
18
Juno
I don’t speak for a long time. I can only cry, and to her credit, Bailey doesn’t push me for the details of what happened. It’s not even clear to me what happened. All of a sudden everything that I thought
