I shoved my hands in my pants pockets. "I can't ban you because you dumped me and then tried to seduce me. Let's just forget that stuff happened and move on."
"That's really generous of you, Ollie." Tears welled in Heidi's eyes, and she sniffled. "Thank you. I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I'm grateful you can see a way to move past all my craziness."
"I forgive you, Heidi."
A single sob burst out of her. She flumped down on the bed, keeping her head down until she'd calmed her staccato breathing. Wiping at her eyes, she raised her face to Mara. "I am so sorry, Mara, for everything. I've been so horrible, trying to steal Ollie away from you. I convinced myself you two weren't serious about each other, that it was just a vacation fling. But now I see how much you two belong together. I swear I have never in my life tried to seduce a guy away from another girl. It's just not me."
"Yeah, it really isn't," I said.
Mara studied Heidi for a moment, her expression giving away nothing.
Heidi grabbed a tissue from the box on the bedside table and blew her nose.
Finally, Mara sighed and sat down beside Heidi. "I forgive you. I honestly don't know if friendship will ever be possible between us, but I won't rule it out. That's the best I can offer."
"It's more than I deserve. Thank you, Mara." Heidi blew her nose again. "I know there isn't any excuse for the way I behaved, but there is kind of an explanation. My boyfriend, Tim, he dumped me last summer. It was the fifth time he'd broken up with me. I kept going back because he kept swearing he'd never cheat on me again, that he loved me so much, that our relationship meant everything to him. And I kept believing him."
"Yeah, I know," I said. "You pushed me overboard so you could go back to him."
"But I regretted it almost immediately. It was too late, though, and I couldn't come crawling back here."
Mara handed Heidi another tissue.
Heidi dried her eyes with it while she said, "I believed I had to fight for my relationship with Tim, to keep trying over and over, because he's not a bad man. He cheated because I wasn't giving him what he needed. Which is bullshit. But I believed that for a long time, partly because he kept telling me it was true."
"I know what that's like," Mara said. "To have someone constantly saying you're not good enough, it hurts. And it burrows into your heart and soul, so deep it can be hard to get it out."
Heidi turned her head toward Mara and blinked rapidly. "How can you be sympathetic to me? I tried to steal Ollie."
"Yeah, but Ollie and I weren't officially a couple. Besides, I'm starting to think you tried to seduce him in public places because you wanted to get caught and be punished for it."
Heidi stared at Mara, her face blank. "How did you know? I just figured that out this morning, after I made myself the wedge that drove you and Ollie apart."
"Once I got over the anger, I realized you must have a lot of insecurities, just like I do." Mara laid her hand over Heidi's. "We have that in common. I understand how other people can mess with your head and make you feel like nothing you do is right. Maybe you should do what I'm doing. Live your life alone for a while and see what happens."
"That sounds like a good idea." Heidi managed a small smile. "You're a super nice person, Mara. I get why Ollie thinks you're amazing."
"He has nothing but nice things to say about you too." Mara patted Heidi's hand. "That's how I know your recent behavior isn't normal for you. And that's why I forgive you. I'm glad we had this talk."
"Me too." Heidi got up. "I'll leave you guys alone now. Please don't give up on each other because of what I did. You two are a perfect match."
She left.
And I was alone with Mara. My skin itched, but I knew it wasn't a physical problem. I had no idea what to say to Mara now. She was leaving. I didn't want her to go, but I couldn't make her stay.
"I get that you need time," I said, "but I meant what I said. I'll wait as long as it takes."
"Yeah, I know." She stood and surveyed her bags. "But I need to do this for myself."
"Let me help you with your luggage."
I reached for the nearest bag, but Mara shooed me away.
"You don't have to do that," she said. "I can manage."
"But it's my job."
"Okay, fine." She picked up one of the smaller suitcases. "I'd appreciate the help."
I picked up the biggest, heaviest suitcase.
Val had offered to drive Mara to the airport with her parents, so I said goodbye to her beside Val's big, super-expensive truck. I kissed her cheek, because anything more seemed weird when she was leaving me. Sure, we hadn't exactly broken up. We hadn't exactly been a couple either. I had no frigging idea what we'd been to each other, but I knew one thing for sure.
I would miss her.
Once Val's truck disappeared down the driveway, I walked over to the little house and knocked on the door.
Eve swung it open and pulled me into a hug. "Ollie, I'm so sorry. I thought you and Mara were perfect for each other."
"So did I. But she didn't really end things. She needs time, that's what she said."
Eve ushered me into the kitchen, waved for me to sit on one of the stools at the island, and took a seat on the one beside me. "Nico told everybody that you and Mara had a huge fight at the restaurant and that she told you to go to hell. I know that's garbage, but
