“Oh my goodness, Matt, thank you.”
“Don’t thank me, thank God. Because there’s nothing natural about walking out of your arms right now.”
“What did you mean, thank God?”
“I mean … I wouldn’t have been able to do that without his strength.”
Her large brown eyes doubled in size. Shock flowered into a smile as large as a melon slice.
“Matt, are you telling me that you’re a Christian? Because what you just did demonstrates the power of the Holy Spirit.”
He nodded. “I’ve been a Christian since the day Melody was born. When you were lying so close to death on that hospital bed, I came to the end of myself. With all my knowledge and medical expertise and a team of doctors, only God could save you. I cried out, and he’s been with me ever since.”
“But that’s over three months ago, and you never said a word?” Her eyebrows arched in question.
“I didn’t want you to think I was making a spiritual commitment just to work my way into your life. I wanted you to see the changes.”
“Oh, Matt, this is incredible news.” She giggled like a schoolgirl.
“Please, tell me you’ve noticed some differences?” He found it charming how her eyes lit up in response.
“Yes, yes, I’ve seen changes but wouldn’t let myself dare dream …”
“Ha—so you’re holding out on me—you do dream of us.”
He stopped as a guarded look spread across her beautiful face, and she turned and walked into the house.”
He stood quiet for a moment and raked his hands through his waves. What was the problem? They shared an obvious attraction, a child, and the Christian faith. What in the world caused that reaction? He wasn’t sure he wanted to know but knew he had to find out.
The slam of the screen door made her jump as she stood by the kitchen sink.
“What was all that about?” He asked as he moved close enough to read her eyes. He waited patiently for her to meet his gaze before he spoke. Unable to help himself, he smoothed an errant curl from her forehead and brushed a thumb under one eyelid to catch a giant tear.
“From happiness to tears, in less than a New York minute?”
“I’m so confused, Matt.”
“Yeah, I think that makes two of us.”
“I enjoy your company so much, and you’re a great friend.”
“Please, don’t give me the let’s be friends talk.” A hint of frustration leaked into his voice.
“No, no, Matt, that’s not it. I can’t help but notice what a great father you are to Melody, and I’m moved beyond words. She needs you.”
“But you don’t.”
“Matt, please, let me finish. As I’ve already admitted, I’m clearly attracted to you, but at the same time I’m afraid.”
“Afraid?”
“Yes. I don’t see how our lives can mesh.”
“I think Melody has already done that, don’t you agree?”
“On one level, yes, but there are so many other complexities.”
“I thought the only reason you were holding back was because of how you felt about Steven and our different belief structures. But, you just admitted the first one is surmountable, though I’d never expect you to give up your wonderful memories, and the second reason no longer exists. So, what are you afraid of?”
“I … I …” She stepped back and turned away. He could tell she was clearly bothered.
“I have a problem with the fact that I didn’t grieve my husband as I believe I should have. This pregnancy and all that has gone on in the past year has made me feel sad about that. I also think I need to respect where my boys are at and stay clear of any relationship, at least for a while.”
Matt could feel her slipping away, and out of desperation he opened his heart to her. “Anna, I love you. I tried not to all those months we were apart, but I couldn’t stop. I’ve never felt this way about anyone. I want you to be my wife. I want the three of us to be a family.”
“But, but Matt—I don’t know how I feel. I’ve not allowed myself to feel. Can you understand how difficult this is?”
He nodded but wouldn’t relent. “That’s understandable. I have no problem with you taking whatever time you need. I just want you to know my intentions.”
“But … there’s so much more.”
“What do you mean?”
You’re younger than me, and that’s unsettling.”
“That makes no sense, we live in the twenty-first century where age means nothing.”
“I don’t know why, but it seems out of order. I guess I’m old-fashioned that way. And that’s small compared to the way women look at you.”
He lifted his brows in question.
“Come on, Matt. You know how good-looking you are? Women … well I don’t know … they savor you like a piece of rich chocolate, and I feel … I feel …”
He smiled. “Seriously? They savor me?”
“Yeah, I don’t know a better word than that. They gaze at you with that hungry look, and you know exactly what I mean.”
“Most people want an attractive spouse, and this is a problem for you?” He tried to make light of it. But she just kept on talking, and he realized how deep her uncertainties ran.
“Let’s face it, the differences between us are monumental. You’re affluent and educated, and I’ve been nothing more than a housewife. Your circle of friends, the huge house you live in, your cultured lifestyle with the theatre, opera, holidays all over the world, is all so completely foreign to me. I’m not a good fit for you. To start something that will only end in heartache for both Melody and me. It’s just not wise.”
“Seriously? When you said you were afraid,
