The scar has long since faded, and I'm thankful I don't remember much of the actual deed itself, but a certain jumpiness remains.
"I interrupted," Will puts in. "Much as I'm doing now, but Nathan tells me that was when he began to lose consciousness."
"Please, carry on," I say, glad that I have someone to help me out. It's not pleasant to think about and even more unpleasant to relate to someone new.
"I'd been outside for a bit," Will continues, "just taking in the sights and sounds of a blacked- out city. When I returned, I heard someone cry out and a piece of furniture get disturbed. I knocked on the door, no answer, so I re-entered the room anyway. Nathan was struggling, so I hauled Adam off. Basically had to punch him off of Nathan, who was, by that time, out of it."
"In so doing, Adam tore my skin. His fangs were deep inside me, and Will pulling him off me tore the skin and flesh, and..." I shrug in a "sorry, you did ask" way and make an attempt to smile at Kieran, who's probably wondering, will this happen to me, too?
"Something I've regretted ever since," Will says.
"But you had to get him off me somehow, so you mustn't blame yourself. Adam put us both in that position."
"True, true, but..." Will's eyes fade out of focus for a moment, then he comes back to us. "I checked on Nathan, and he didn't respond, so I told Adam to get the hell out of there."
"And I never saw him again," I put in.
Will glances at me, and I wonder what he's thinking. "Adam scarpered while I tended to Nathan. I did my best to seal the wound but made a hash job of it. When the bleeding began to slow, I realised he was dying, and..." He looks down at the ground, pacing slowly back and forth over a narrow section of the carpet, as if he's on the narrow beam at the Olympics, careful of where he treads. "I did what I had to do."
"Which was?" Kieran prompts. "I mean, I know you changed him, but what does it involve? Does it hurt?"
"Ordinarily, no," I reassure him. "Look, what you have to realise is, my change was exceptional. It was painful and violent and against my will. Will, however, did what he could to make sure he wasn't left with a corpse on his hands. Well, one that couldn't walk or talk, I mean. What happens is, you drink from the person until they're almost unconscious and close to death. Only close, mind you. Not with the Grim Reaper breathing down their bleeding neck." I smile, trying to lift his mood. The poor guy might be in love, but he's scared as all hell about what lies ahead of him.
If I agree to do this.
Which I won't.
"But wait." Kieran points at me then Will, frowning. "Almost unconscious? But you were out of it completely, so how did Will...?"
"I tore my own wrist and bled into his mouth. And into the open wound. I'd never heard of anyone doing that before but thought it was worth a try." Will gives a wry smile. "I'm a pioneer--- managing to change someone by bleeding into their open wound as well as into their mouth. It doesn't normally happen because the neck wounds aren't so open as Nathan's was. Not so much a wound as a fucking war zone." He shrugs, his body language apologising for his spoken words. "Nathan drifted in and out, which he assures me he doesn't remember, but from time to time, I managed to get him to drink. I doubt he knew what he was doing, and I was scared he'd hate me for it later, but it was either that or let him die properly, and I wasn't prepared to do that. Never mind leaving it on Adam's conscience; I didn't want it on mine."
"So after that, what?" Kieran asks.
"I left him there and went out to a safe house. I got another vampire I knew at the time to help me get Nathan there."
"And when I came round, I begged Will not to tell Adam I was still alive. I'd much rather have him believe I was dead permanently than know his attempt to force me to change had been successful."
"And you agreed to this?" Kieran looks up at Will from his seat on the settee, watching as he paces.
"I had to. It was Nathan's right. He'd been through enough. I insisted on occasional contact, though. Personal ads in the newspaper, progressing to post office boxes, and in the modern age, e- mails and texts make it so much simpler. I wanted to make sure he was all right."
"But I was at a safe house. They looked after me. We let it be thought I was killed in a bombing raid. Wartime. Easy excuse, ready-made, really." I shrug. I know I make it sound oh-so-simple, but how else am I supposed to cope? To deal with it?
"It's not a story I ever wanted to repeat, but..." I gesture at them both with one hand sweeping through the air before me.
"Sorry." Kieran's almost pouting.
"Don't worry about it. You're here now."
"And what about Adam? What happened to him?"
"I maintained contact," Will says. "In the same way as I did with Nathan, only he didn't know about Nathan, of course. I said it would be better if we limited contact with each other for the sake of not being found out, keeping it covered. You know."
"But how did you explain Nathan? I mean, what did you say you'd done with his---" Kieran glances at me, apologising with his eyes "---body? If Adam thought he was dead, what did you tell him?"
"Nothing. He didn't ask." Will raises his palms in a perfectly-executed Gallic shrug. "He didn't want to talk about it on the rare occasions we spoke or
