Sex is a distraction; but with Cass, I’m starting to think we could have a helluva lot more than just sex.
Cassidy
“There’s my girl!” Eddie says when he spots me walking through the door of Frasier’s Sports Bar, the neighborhood watering hole where everyone goes to watch games on their enormous collection of flat screens. Tonight’s the first game of regular season football, so I had previously made plans to get together with some of the guys from our fantasy team to watch it together and eat hot wings. Eddie’s also a football fan, so he was added to the unofficial guest list the other day when the topic came up as we were getting dressed after a romp.
“Hey,” I say as I approach him. When he holds his meaty arms out for me, I step into them for a hug. If Mike is a smaller version of Xavier, then Eddie is the supersized model. Not that I agreed to go out with him because of the resemblance or anything. He’s a nice guy who I’ve been having some fun with, mostly in bed.
“I wasn’t sure if you were still coming or not. You didn’t return any of my messages,” Eddie tells me.
“Oh, ah, sorry. I had to get a new phone and it’s still in the box,” I explain. “It should be up and working again tonight.”
“Good, and I’m glad you made it,” he replies. “I’ve been waiting all week to give you a present.”
“You got me a present?” I ask in surprise since that seems a little out of the ordinary for fuck buddies. What are customary gifts from the guy you’re sleeping with? Condoms? Sex toys?
Reaching into his back pocket of his blue jeans that look painted on his thighs, not because he purchased them tight necessarily, but because it was probably the biggest size in stock, Eddie removes a plain white envelope.
“You…wrote me a letter?” I guess as I continue to stand in front of him.
“Nope. Open it,” he says when he hands it to me and then his palms both come down on either of my hips.
I carefully peel the sealed flap open and then take a peek inside.
“Is that…are these…” I stammer before I pull them out.
“Season tickets, baby!” Eddie says.
“Wow,” I gasp as I flip through the stack of tickets for every Ravens’ home game this season. “This is way too much, Eddie! You shouldn’t have,” I tell him.
“We’ll go together to all of them,” he tells me. “It’s going to be awesome.”
“That-that is awesome,” I agree, elated for the games while at the same time I feel extremely guilty.
Season tickets over seventeen weeks, more if, fingers crossed, the Ravens make the playoffs, that’s…months of dates with a man I don’t feel anything for unless he’s inside of me. I thought he felt the same.
Our relationship is apparently growing all lopsided. It was supposed to be fun and spontaneous, no strings attached. He didn’t just give me a string. This is a freaking rope that’s sturdy enough to climb if I accept.
And I can’t accept the season tickets if I know I can’t return his enthusiasm for us being together.
God, I’m a horrible person for not seeing this coming before now to put on the brakes. We’ve only been seeing each other for a few weeks. How was I supposed to know that he wanted more?
I can’t give him more! Not when my heart belongs to someone else, even if Xavier will never reciprocate.
Poor Eddie. Am I his Xavier?
“Eddie…” I start, taking a step back so his hands fall from my hips but placing my hand on his arm to soften the blow as I try and figure out the words to turn him down gently. “Season tickets are a really sweet gift, but I don’t think we’re there yet or ever will be.”
“Where? At the stadium?” he asks with his forehead scrunched in confusion. Bless his heart.
“I don’t think we’re at that stage of our relationship,” I explain.
“It’s too much too soon,” he says on a sigh when he finally understands.
“A little bit,” I reply.
“I didn’t think about that,” he tells me with a frown. “I just knew we were both Raven fans and thought it would be fun to have someone go with me to all of the games, someone who is a bigger fan than I am.”
Well, shit. Now I feel horrible.
“How about this,” I suggest. “There are six home games. So, what if I agree to go with you, as friends, to maybe two or three of them, and then you can go to the other games with someone else. Will that work?”
“Will you still let me come over some nights?’ he asks.
“Let’s play things by ear,” I tell him, even though it’s doubtful. I don’t want to string him along if I don’t feel the same way he feels about me. It’s not fair to Eddie.
“Does that mean you’ll call me if you want Big Eddie?” he asks.
“Yes,” I agree while trying to bite back my laugh at the mention of the nickname he gave his member.
“Okay,” he replies. “Have a seat, and I’ll go get us both a beer.”
“Thanks, Eddie,” I tell him.
Once he’s gone, I glance over at the door to keep an eye out for Xavier. He’s supposed to come straight over after he talks to Coach Briggs. And even though it’s only been a few hours since I last saw him, I can’t wait for him to walk through the door.
Chapter Thirteen
Xavier
I’m feeling pretty damn good when I walk into Frasier’s. I had a great workout, and Coach was blown away by the results of my conditioning and fitness test. Now it’s only a matter of time before a manager hopefully gets back to him about scheduling a fight. I’m nervous but also excited to get in the cage. Once I get everything in writing, I’ll share the news with my parents and Macy and pray they don’t
