Ethan's teeth ground together; his fingers dug into his biceps as he took a deep breath and tried to calm himself. They couldn't possibly know every part of him hurt, even his hair. They didn't understand all he wanted was to tear the throat out of someone, feast on their blood, and give in to the relief he knew the insanity would offer him.
"It would be good to get out," Emma agreed.
Ethan could feel their gazes burning into him as they all turned toward him. He felt the force of the no burning in his throat, but the hope in her voice kept his tongue nailed to the roof of his mouth. The only thing she'd asked from him since all this started was time. She didn't hate him for keeping this from her; she hadn't run screaming from him even when he'd tried to get her to do so. How could he deny her something so simple?
"I don't think it's a good idea," Isabelle said.
His arms dropped down to his side as he sat up in his chair and focused on Emma. "If you agree to stay by my side, I'll take you wherever you want to go."
"I'm not sure about that, Ethan," Stefan cautioned.
Ethan rose to his feet and stepped closer to Emma, and the closer he got to her the less the bloodlust building within him tore at his insides. Unable to stop himself, he rested his hand against her elbow. A breath of relief escaped him as the feel of her skin soothed him even more. It took all he had not to crush her against him and ease the burning, but her words from last night still echoed in his mind, and he'd be damned if he was the one who destroyed her.
Her head tipped back to look up at him. Through the shaded lenses of her glasses, he could see the beauty of her bloodshot and swollen eyes. The sound of her crying had drifted to him last night and torn at his soul. There was nothing he could do to make it better for her though, not while she was still trying to figure out what path she was going to take.
"You have to stay by me though, Emma," he reiterated.
His words probably should remind her of Tristan's overbearing demeanor, maybe they should be a warning, but she didn't take them as such. Tristan would never walk away from her. No matter what this did to him though, Ethan would let her go.
"I will," she promised.
He forced a smile as he bowed his head in acknowledgment of her words. The last thing he wanted was to be out around other humans, to have her out around other humans, but she'd already been caged by someone else, he wasn't about to cage her too.
"Where do you want to go?" he asked.
She looked to Mandy and Jill who shrugged in response. "The beach," Mandy suggested.
"Volleyball," Jill said with a grin.
"Is that okay?" Emma whispered to him.
He squeezed her elbow. "It's fine. We just have to change."
"So do we." Emma turned and hurried away with her friends.
Stefan waited until Isabelle, and his brothers went inside before stepping next to him. "Are you sure about this?"
Ethan barely glanced at him before nodding. "It's what she wants."
"And what about you? Can you control yourself?"
"I'm going to have to."
He said the words, but he wasn't entirely sure what he was capable of when they got around all of those people, and all of those blood-pumping, painfully tempting heartbeats.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Emma settled onto one of the lounge chairs and dropped her feet down on either side of it. Ethan sat beside her; he was holding himself as carefully as someone holding the most priceless vase, on a ship, in the middle of the Bering Sea. Watching his almost mechanical movements was excruciating.
This was an incredibly bad idea, she realized as she studied his rigid profile. He'd barely said two words since they left the house, and now his nostrils were flaring as if he'd just run a marathon. Unable to resist touching him, she rested her hand on his arm.
Emma marveled when he visibly relaxed at her touch. He was the strongest man she'd ever met, yet she had this incredible effect on him. She was weak and small, and he needed her. A lump formed in her throat, and her hand curled around his forearm as she tried to give him more comfort.
"We can leave," she offered.
He didn't even turn his head to look at her. "No."
Emma frowned at him before turning to search the crowd around them. Isabelle was sitting in the lounge chair beside her, but strangely enough, Stefan settled beside Ethan. It was the first time she'd ever seen the two of them sit separately. Aiden and Ian joined Jill over by the volleyball game, and Mandy sat on the other side of Isabelle. The dull thud of the volleyball bouncing back and forth, and the grunts of the people playing, filled the air.
Ian looked up and frowned when he spotted Stefan sitting beside Ethan. He elbowed his brother and said something before breaking away from the game and coming over to join them. Yes, this most definitely was a mistake, if Ethan's actions weren't a big indication of that, the reactions of his family members were.
"I'm fine." Emma stared at Ethan as his head finally swiveled toward her. His eyes remained covered, but she knew they weren’t green. "Relax."
She couldn't relax though, not when he looked as if he were going to fracture at any second. Emma squeezed his arm again and released him. A shudder went through him, but when she went to touch him again, he shook his head. "Don't, Emma."
Her hand hovered in the space between them; frustration filled her before she dropped it to her side. She folded her hands before her as Aiden and Jill jumped into the game and started playing. Though she enjoyed watching
