-LAUREN-
“Listen, Lauren. It’s been amazing,” Ren said, giving my arm a squeeze and steering us off the main path into a wooded trail.
All week long, Ren’s arm around my shoulders had been so soothing, especially at my twelve-week checkup. He’d driven me down the mountain, jaw dropping when he heard the heartbeat for the first time. Everything was so perfect. Like we might actually find our way to love. But after what he just did to Carter, his arm felt slimy.
“We have to head back tomorrow though,” he continued. “Fashion week’s about ten weeks out, and my mom has my schedule packed.”
Fashion week.
I’d lived and breathed and worked my butt off for the past two years just hoping for the chance to style models at a fashion-week runway show someday.
“Looking back,” he said, “I was an idiot to break things off with you. I was so caught up in the industry, you know?”
“I totally do.” Just remembering my time working with Veronica Hayes brought back that rush of adrenaline. “I loved working with your mom.”
“That’s what I’m talking about. You’re a perfect match for the family business. You know my mom, and she can hook you up to train with the best stylists in the industry. You’ll have your dream job. And one of my buddies has a bunch of kids. I’m sure he can recommend some good nannies.”
We have to head back tomorrow.
“Ren, stop. What are you talking about exactly?”
He turned to me, took my hands in his. Soft hands. A sheepish grin curled at the corners of his mouth.
“Isn’t it obvious? It’s like two plus two. You’re having my kid. My mom’s ready for the next phase in life—grandkids, the works. You share my passions. And we can get family perks with the company. It all makes so much sense, doesn’t it? Besides, you’re drop-dead gorgeous, and I’m not marrying anything less.”
“Wait.” The word came out as a whisper. The world was spinning. “A-are you asking me to marry you?”
“Mom’s all for it.”
“You talked to your mom about us?”
“Obviously. I needed her take on the baby, settling down. She thinks being a family man will be awesome for my rep. And guess what? She offered to promote me to head of her international line. So, what do you think? Should we get off this mountain, tell her the good news?”
Ren’s family was loaded. If I said yes, I’d have anything I wanted. Literally. Dating him was just a taste of what it would mean to be his wife, and he spoiled me like a total princess when we were together. I wouldn’t have to worry about where I’d live, how I’d take care of the baby. I’d have the career I’d dreamed of since as long as I could remember. My own mother would be beyond happy if I married him. She’d actually be proud of me. Becoming Veronica Hayes’ daughter-in-law would make me a total success in her eyes.
I’d belong to the perfect family.
Perfect.
That word struck a hollow chord inside me, my mom’s voice echoing from somewhere in the past. Perfection was always the goal, right?
But something else warred inside me. The feel of calloused hands, and the look in Carter’s eyes whenever he talked about his wife. Did Ren feel anywhere near that way about me?
“Do you love me?” I asked.
In all of our time together, he’d never said he did. I’d felt it in the way he treated me. I always thought, if we would’ve had more time, he would’ve said it soon. But he never did.
“What is this, Lauren?”
I squared my shoulders and met his gaze. Everything about this marriage sounded perfect, except for one missing piece. And I couldn’t live with myself if I said yes without knowing for sure.
“Do you love me?” I asked again, searching the depths of Ren’s sea-green eyes, golden flecks floating inside, taunting me with every second spanning between us.
“Plenty of marriages start because they make sense. It’d be a good fit for both of us, right? And, I’m not saying I’ll never get there, but—”
“You don’t love me,” I whispered. My chest ripped open.
“I’m sorry. Right now, I can’t say that I do. I think you’re incredible. I think you have definite potential in the industry. I think we can help each other out, I—”
“No.”
I blinked away a few tears, thinking back to the basketball game. To the kind of guy who would trip someone in a stupid pickup game, forget the fact that Carter had a serious challenge in the leg department. Did Ren want to get married because of the promotion his mom was offering? And if he didn’t love me, and if he didn’t take marriage seriously, would he cheat? I’d never felt a pain like the pain I felt when he ghosted me. We only slept together once, and I thought he loved me, but he just disappeared after.
“No. I don’t want a good marriage deal, Ren. If you don’t love me, I’m out.”
“Come on, Laur. Think this through.” He stepped closer, rubbing my shoulders.
I remembered the intensity in Carter’s face when he stared at that bench on his lake walk. The reverence in his voice whenever he talked about Megan. The warmth in his arms when he’d told me about comforting her in the night.
“I deserve love. And, yeah, everything you’re saying sounds amazing, but . . . what’s the point if I don’t have the one thing I want? The thing I deserve.”
He scoffed. Anger burned red in his cheeks and spread to his neck.
“I’m not the kind of guy to say something I don’t really mean.”
“I can respect that. But . . . no.” I wasn’t giving up on this. I’d been in relationships without love for too long, and I couldn’t imagine living that way forever. “I’m sorry.”
He studied me. Shook his
