Probably brokered through some crafty Kobolds in the remnants of the old Soviet Union. Those little jerks didn’t care as long as they got what they wanted.
But it wasn’t the orkes that made him shudder as the van rocked through the hole Odom had fist-blasted in the gate.
No, it was–what had Sinzerklaazz called them? Seltives?
The semi-cute, yet disturbing fur people they had encountered on their way to Sinzerklaazz’s keep. Roughly a third the size of a normal human. Covered in short, dark fur. Their heads with seal-like snouts and cat-like ears. Each holding a lit candle.
They had changed a bit since he last saw them.
A Seltive hurled itself past the front of the van. Barely missing them. The creature had grown twice as big. Huge, gleaming claws sprouted from their cute, furry paws.
Well, maybe not so cute now.
Terrible fangs sprouted from their gaping muzzles. Thick muscles bunched under their fur.
And instead of soothing, chanted songs, they howled with animal rage.
They still had the candles though.
One Seltive landed in front of a group of charging orkes. Raised the sputtering candle to its snout and hissed out a spray of something from its mouth.
Which burst into a great ball of orange and yellow flame that engulfed the orkes.
Cute had left the building.
“Holy fuck!” Marco cried, “I wanna go home!”
Hilario couldn’t have agreed with him more.
Unfortunately home wasn’t going to be any better than this place if they couldn’t figure out how to save the city from the lords of the dark places.
“Look out!” Larry shouted.
Which wasn’t necessary. Hilario had already seen the three orkes lower their shoulder mounted rocket launchers at them.
Hilario tried to project images of candy dreams into their little brains, but he couldn’t summon the concentration.
Fortunately a dozen Seltives jumped the orkes, fangs bared, clawed fingers ripped at their flesh.
He steered the van away.
Where the heckity heck was he going?
His gaze found the black tower of the Eye of Malachi directly ahead. Ice formed in his gut.
Really? Was that the only choice?
The pitched battle raged on either side of the lane. Seltives pushing back the orkes.
Clearing a path for the van.
Oh, pooper doodles.
He clenched the wheel and ground his teeth together. Pushed the gas pedal to the floor and aimed the van at the tower.
An explosion ahead of them threw orkes and Seltives spinning into the air. Hilario swerved the van around the bodies. A stench of gunpowder washed through the van.
As much as he could aim the van.
The tower bulked up ahead of them. How were they going to–
Oh.
An arch appeared at the base of the tower. A deeper blackness on the black tower. An almost imperceptible shimmer.
Where was it going to take them, though?
Somewhere Sinzerklaazz wanted them to go?
How good an idea was that?
He was getting rather tired of getting sent hither and yon by powerful beings who refused to tell him what the heckity heck was going on. Do what you do best…Take this, you’ll know what to do with it…
Well, no, none of that was helpful. Getting chased by orkes with machine guns and rocket launchers wasn’t helpful. Getting sent blindly into yet another Eye of Malachi wasn’t helpful.
How was he supposed to save an entire city with a bag? Really? Come on now.
An explosion rocked the van. Orange flames filled the rearview mirrors.
A thick line of orkes ran over the Seltives behind him. They ran screaming at the van. Machine gun fire rattled. A bullet went through the passenger side mirror.
Okay, maybe staying here wasn’t an option either.
But maybe he had an option of where he could go.
He jammed his hand into the secret pocket on his (now filthy) orange and white striped uniform.
Pulled out Roger’s homing amulet.
The van rattled toward the arched doorway to the Eye of Malachi.
He glanced down at the gold and sapphire bauble. How the heckity heck did it work? It couldn’t be complicated if ogres were using it.
“Clown! What are you doing!” the Sapphire Witch shouted.
Hmmm, did someone recognize it?
The sapphire at the center of the amulet glowed. The strange symbols on the gold around it glowed too. The thing must feel the proximity to the Eye of Malachi.
No time to ask Roger how the thing worked.
Orkes poured over the Seltive line. Only a couple more seconds.
Skin contact. He probably need to put his hand on it.
No time to take his glove off.
He jammed the amulet in his mouth. An electric jolt went through him.
“Clown!” the Sapphire Witch shouted.
Lines of power formed on the doorway ahead. A path.
“No!” the Sapphire Witch shouted.
The van’s nose touched the doorway. His head buzzed with energy.
Was this a bad idea?
The lines of power enveloped the van. Yanked it in.
Too late now.
52
Someone was screaming.
It seemed like someone was always screaming.
His entire life, screams had been the background music to his days and nights. Well, nights. It was always perpetual night or twilight in the unseen world.
Maybe that’s why everyone was always so cranky. Maybe they just needed a little sunlight.
The normal world hogged all the light. As much as the unseen world coveted the normal world, they probably just wanted some sunlight too.
Firelight simply wasn’t the same. Especially since the storm troops of the dark lords had a habit of setting things on fire. Nice place you have here. Look better on fire, though. There, fixed it for ya.
Who the heckity heck was screaming?
And why was it so dark?
And what was this tingly, metallic taste in his mouth?
Familiar smells, though. Awful musky cologne. Rotten cabbage. Hints of leather and spice.
But who was screaming? It was
