“It’s hot out there.” He pushed his hair back off his forehead. He put the broom near the basement door.
“It’s supposed to get up to 95 degrees.”
“It has to be bloody 90 now.”
Jagger walked behind the counter and took the seat next to me. I grabbed a paper towel off the roll behind me and wiped the sweat from his forehead.
He found my eyes with his. “I know this may be a bit overwhelming but I’m okay with this and I want you to be.”
I knew exactly what he meant. “This is a lot.”
“The fame thing, the age thing, but I’m an adult.”
“Barely. Do you even know how old I am?”
“Yes, of course, I know.” He smiled and I had to shake it off. He mouthed the word forty-four.
“And you’re okay with it?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Is this a thing for you?” I needed an explanation.
“A thing?”
“Yes. Do you have a thing for older women?”
“Uh, that’s what you mean. Huh, I wouldn’t say that. This is a unique situation.”
“How so?” I was curious.
“I’ve been with women that were older than me by a few years. No one in their forties.”
I let out a nervous giggle. “Well, that’s not a comfort at all.”
“I told you who I am. It’s in my best interest to have sex with women older than me. My fans are young. It’s been drilled into me for years to never take a chance on someone younger. The laws are different in different countries and I’ve been all over the world. Some places fifteen years is acceptable, other places fifteen is statutory rape. My actions feed people. If I fuck up, I don’t just fuck up for myself. I fuck up for my management team, my record label, my bandmates, my video director, my stylist, my hairdresser, my security, everyone employed under all these people. I don’t have the liberty to get arrested or to sleep with a groupie three years younger than me. I have to be responsible. I have to be a thirty-year-old man in a twenty-year-old body.”
His words came out like this huge burden even though he said them in such a nonchalant manner. Everything was true. He had a huge responsibility on his shoulders and I could see how it wore him down.
“Kat, I am not trying to be a martyr. I’m just not this young naïve boy that you think I am. I know what I’m doing.”
“Yes, you do. I just don’t want you to fall into anything that will damage you in any way. With age comes this regret that will live with you forever and you can’t turn back time.”
“I appreciate you looking out for me but I like you. You like me. There’s no reason we shouldn’t be together. You promised.”
“I did. I was naked and you were inside me when I did that. So does it count?”
“Yea, it bloody counts.”
“You told me you were only going to be here for three months.”
“True.”
“Why three months?”
“That’s how long my rehabilitation lasts.”
I was quiet as I tried to figure out what he meant. “For addiction, what kind of addiction?”
“Drugs, alcohol. I don’t have sex addition if that’s a real thing.”
“Are you sure about the sex addiction?”
“Lusting after you doesn’t make me a sexual addict. It makes me horny and smart.”
“What kinds of drugs?”
“Uh, smack, coke, whatever.”
“Smack? What’s smack?”
“Heroin.”
“Oh.” I tried to choose my words carefully and not looked too surprised. “You seem normal.”
“I’ve been clean for a few months.”
“Is it hard?”
“Yes. Do you know anyone that’s ever been on drugs?”
“My brother but I think its just weed. Do you want to stay clean?”
“I want to, yes. It’s bloody hard to write music when I’m using. Sometimes I slip into a dark place and I don’t know. It’s hard to cope. There’s a lot of pressure that comes with what I do.”
“I can see that. I went to your Instagram and I saw that you were posting. It says that you’re in London.”
“My assistant is posting on all my social media accounts. I have to have a social media presence at all times.”
“You have a personal assistant?”
“Yes, he’s been with me for two years. He doesn’t know I’m in rehab. He thinks I’m on a vacation. Everything is top secret. My label keeps things from the public. Being in Galena has been good for me. Being with you has been good for me. You know I live with my therapist and his wife.”
“Yeah, Glass.”
“Dr. David Glass, he invited you to dinner tomorrow.”
“Really?”
“He wants to probably make sure you’re a real person. It will be after we close to the shop. You have to say yes.”
“Yeah, and speaking of dinner, I have to meet Nelson tonight for dinner.”
“You made a date with him?”
“It was before—”
“You didn’t cancel.”
“You told me who you really were and I forgot all about it. Now it’s too late to cancel. It would be rude.”
“You can’t be rude to one random bloke.”
“No, I cannot. He’s a friend of my family.”
“How noble.” He smirked.
“Don’t act jealous.”
“I’m not acting. I’m literally a jealous fucker.”
I sighed. Jagger was so dramatic. Were all British people this extra? “There’s no need to be jealous. We’re going to eat. He’s going to tell me all the Galena gossip and then I’m coming right back here.”
“Can I forbid you to go?”
I rolled my eyes. “No, but you can wait here for me to get back.”
“Naked.”
“Why would you be wearing clothes? I need you to be naked in my bed with a guitar between your legs. Can you make that happen?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
We were staring at each other grinning broadly. I loved the way he made me feel. I loved the way I felt when I was with him.
The bells on the door jingled. The lovey-dovey trance was broken. I had to look away from his bronze eyes. We had a customer.
Jagger didn’t break anything before I left on my dinner date with Nelson.
