While I’m encouraged by what seems to me to be a mutual attraction, unfortunately for me, she is a woman of extraordinary willpower. She may have felt that same connection being made between us, but she has the ability to keep me at an arm’s distance and stuff it all down. But I think knowing she’s attracted to me puts a slight crack in that hard outer shell of hers. I can work with that.
She clears her throat and glances at her watch. “Well, listen, thank you for dinner,” she blurts out. “But I really need to get going.”
“Sure,” I nod. “Thanks for joining me tonight.”
Her cheeks are burning bright red, her smile is uncertain, and she’s still avoiding direct eye contact with me as she gets to her feet.
“G – goodnight,” she stammers.
“Night, Berlin,” I reply. “I hope we can do this again sometime.”
With another awkward smile, she dashes out of the restaurant, leaving me sitting there with a smile on my face, my pulse quicker than it was a few minutes ago, and a certainty that sooner, rather than later, Berlin will be mine. It’s not going to be easy, and she will throw a lot of obstacles in my path, but eventually I am going to win her over. I feel absolutely certain of that.
With nowhere to be, I order another mojito and sit back as I ponder some of the questions floating around in my head and try to map out a plan to make her mine.
Chapter Seven Berlin
“So what was it all about then?”
I shrug and pop a French fry into my mouth. “I have no idea. It was just – weird,” I note. “I mean, he said he had to talk to me about something important, but nothing important came up.”
Gabs and I are sitting in a burger shop around the corner from my apartment, discussing my dinner with Sawyer. Or perhaps dissecting is a better word. My neighbor, Mrs. Hawley, offered to sit with my dad for a little while so I could run some errands and whatnot like she does every Saturday. She’s an older widow who has plenty of time on her hands, so she’s always offering to keep an eye on him for me – which is something I appreciate a lot. It allows me to do what I need to do but also allows me to have some semblance of a social life on the rare occasion I decide I need some time out.
“Maybe he just wanted to go on a date with you,” Gabby laughs.
I laugh and shake my head. “Doubtful. It seemed like there really was something he wanted to say, but he couldn’t quite seem to spit it out,” I note. “It was strange.”
“Sounds like you intimidate the poor man.”
“Hardly. Sawyer West is the most self-assured man I’ve ever met. His confidence borders on cocky – which is annoying,” I scoff. “The man never second-guesses himself – which is also kind of annoying, since he doesn’t allow for the possibility that he could be wrong.”
A quirky grin touches Gabby’s lips. “Know what you sound like?”
“Enlighten me.”
“You sound like a girl with a crush who is trying to list out every negative trait somebody has so you can convince yourself that you don’t like him,” she laughs. “You kind of sound like you’re trying to talk yourself out of a crush.”
“Oh, shut up,” I giggle. “I do not have a crush.”
She takes a sip of her soda, her mischievousness coming through in the glint in her eye and the grin on her face. Gabs knows me inside and out. She sometimes even sees things in me that I don’t see myself.
Is it possible I have a crush on Sawyer? I suppose it’s possible. I mean, he’s gorgeous, and he genuinely does seem more mature today than he did back in school. At the same time, though, there were points I could see the cocky, arrogant side of him I knew and despised so much all those years ago peeking out.
“You keep telling yourself that, hon,” she laughs. “But tell me why you think he wouldn’t just want to spend time with you.”
I shrug. “I’m not his type. I’m not rich. I don’t have lingerie model good looks,” I say. “We don’t move in the same social circles and have nothing in common.”
“Okay, for one thing, you underestimate just how gorgeous you are –”
“Stop,” I say, my cheeks burning with color. “I’m not fishing for compliments.”
“I know you’re not. And you know me well enough to know that I don’t hand out compliments to people who are.”
I purse my lips – that much is true. Gabs has never had much of a tolerance for people who go fishing for validation and compliments. When she says something, it’s because she means it. Still, I’ve never been good at taking compliments. Even just hearing Gabs, somebody I love with everything in me, offer me a compliment makes me feel – gross. I somehow feel unworthy of somebody’s praise. I always have, and I don’t know that it’s going to change in this lifetime.
“Anyway, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted,” she grins at me. “You underestimate your beauty, Berlin. And maybe, just maybe, it’s not your looks that attract him anyway. Maybe, and I’m just putting this out there, but maybe he’s interested in you as a person. For your brains as well as your magnificent rack.”
The laughter bursts from my throat, and I slap her playfully on the arm. She’s managed to embarrass me to the point that my cheeks are burning red. I kind of
