She looked into the back of his wagon. “This looks like it was bought by one of those English people who thinks the end of the world is coming.”
“It is. One day.” He picked up the bag of alfalfa pellets and hoisted it onto his shoulder.
“Levi. It’s a wedding. He’s our cousin. Everyone will be devastated if you don’t come.”
“I doubt that.” In fact, he was pretty certain that his cousin, who was widowed and getting married for the second time, wouldn’t notice if Levi was there or not. Maybe if he was cousins with the bride it would be different, but men didn’t put as much importance on things like weddings. To men like him, the marriage was more important, and his marriage was gone. His not wanting to go to the wedding had nothing to do with the fact that his cousin was starting over while to Levi the concept of a new beginning was as foreign as the moon.
“Then do it for Mamm.”
The words stopped him. His mother. She was one of the ones who acted like everything was just as it had always been. He appreciated the fact that she was trying, in her own way, to help him move forward, but so far, her efforts had been in vain. He was stuck.
Maybe when the holidays were over. How could he move forward if all he could think about were the things that were gone?
“Mims.” The one word said it all. How she wasn’t playing fair, how she needed to think about his feelings too, and how family came first, but some things were delicate.
His sister propped her hands on her hips in that sassy way of hers, but her eyes softened. “Lee.”
“Fine.” He sighed. There were some things in this world that were too tough to fight, and Mims was one of them.
“You won’t regret it.” She beamed at him. “I promise you.”
That was strange, because he regretted it already.
He shook his head. “Don’t just stand there. Help me get these things in the house.” He pointed to the bag of cat food. It was by far the smallest of his supplies, and he knew that Mims was a strong woman both in her head and in her muscles, but he didn’t really need her help. He was hoping that once he got her body occupied, she would stop trying to find things to tell him to do.
She picked up the bag and toted it toward the house. “Why are you buying cat food?” she asked. So much for his theory. “You don’t have a cat.”
Levi gathered up the remaining supplies and started behind her.
“Are you going to feed every stray that comes along?” Mims sighed. “You’ll have a hundred dogs and twice that many cats before next fall.”
“I can’t watch an animal starve, Mims.” But he wasn’t the one who had started feeding the strays. That had been all Mary. But how could he stop? They came to the house needing comfort and food, sometimes even shelter. How could he turn them away?
She shook her head as he opened the door. She pushed her way inside and headed for the kitchen. “You’ll definitely need to get remarried. Or you’ll end up being that crazy old man with a thousand pets.”
“I’m not getting remarried,” he said before he even realized the words were in his head. “Not ever.”
“You don’t mean that.” She eyed him warily as if he was about to do something no man should even think about.
“I do.”
“Levi.” There went her cajoling voice again. She had perfected that when they were children, and she used it regularly to get whatever it was that she wanted.
“If it’s God’s will that my wife and son are gone, then it’s surely God’s will that I remain alone for the rest of my days.”
Chapter Three
“This is too much,” Tillie whispered as a car pulled up outside her family home. Her sister Leah; Leah’s husband, Jamie; and their son, Peter, hopped out of the car and waved.
Beside her, Tillie felt, rather than saw, her mamm smile. “It’s just a family dinner.”
Just a family dinner. To most, that meant the family members in a household gathering around the table for a quick meal. For Eunice Gingerich, that meant everyone she could fit in her house. For Tillie, it was completely overwhelming.
Hannah and Aaron had arrived some time ago with their three children. Jim, Anna, and their five had walked across with Dave, who at this point Tillie was glad had no children.
“Gracie and Matthew should be here shortly,” Mamm said with a smile as she returned Peter’s enthusiastic wave.
And that was another six. Add in Brandon, his friend Shelly, Mammi, and everyone else, plus Tillie made twenty-nine. That many people did not add up to a simple family dinner. Not even among the Amish.
“Mamm—” Tillie started.
But her mother shook her head. “Hush now, girl. We’re just happy you’re home.”
And she was happy to be home. Wasn’t she? Except she didn’t feel all that happy. It wasn’t that she missed Melvin. She did. But she didn’t miss the life that they had built.
Tillie touched a quick hand to her belly. Everyone seemed content to ignore the fact that she was nearly eight months pregnant.
Or maybe they don’t care that you sinned.
If that was the case, she was sure it was because they loved her. The rest of the community wouldn’t be so forgiving. And it was only a matter of time before her family would have to shun her as well. They wouldn’t be able to eat with her, take money from her, or even talk to her. A time of reckoning was coming, and she both wished it was already there and dreaded it, all in the same instant.
“Everybody’s bringing food,” Mamm said. “And we’ve got paper plates and plastic cups. All we have to do now is eat and enjoy ourselves.”
Tillie smiled. If only that were the truth.
