“Annaka.” Grampy was laughing. “Look at you, tripping all over yourself.”
“I wanna go home.” I began crying.
“Annaka, what’s wrong? You don’t want to go to Cape Forchu?”
“No, I just want to see Clay.”
“Clay?” Grampy snickered. “Your imagination gets the best of you.”
“No.” I shook my head. “It’s the best part of me.” I closed my eyes.
I didn’t want to go through these memories anymore. I just wanted to go home. I didn’t want to live in the past anymore. I just wanted to be present. Clay was hurt and he needed my help.
“Where are you, buddy?” I whispered.
“What are you doing with the journal? Are you trying to go back again?” I opened my eyes to see Tia facing me on Bobby Noah’s back deck. It was the night of the party I had written about in the journal.
“Holy shit,” I said out loud.
Tia looked at me closely. “What’s up? Are you trying to go back?”
“No, I’m trying to go forward.”
“What are you talking about?”
I looked down—I was holding the journal, open to the page I had written about the party. I had an idea.
“I’m sorry if this hurts, buddy. I really am.”
“Anna, what are you talking about?” Tia asked.
“It’s Annaka,” I said as I pulled the page, ripping it clean out of the journal.
I heard Clay scream from somewhere and everything faded away. We were away from drunk teenagers, loud music and from the rest of the world. Everything was dark.
“Clay, I can hear you. Bring me back. Please, try!” I could hear him yelling in pain. I held what was left of the journal and closed my eyes. “Please, please, please, buddy.”
When I opened my eyes again I was back in the truck, driving down the road. I heard the loud honk of an oncoming car, and jerked the steering wheel as hard as I could to the right, switching lanes and narrowly missing the car in front of me. I floored it towards town.
“Anna, I can’t control it. I can’t. Everything is falling out of me.” Clay was holding his stomach. His nose was bleeding and his eyes were wide.
I slowed down, pulling over to the side of the road. I looked at his stomach, and there was a stain of blue blood soaking through his dress shirt.
“Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.” I was freaking out.
“Take me to the tree house. If I’m gonna go, that’s where I wanna go.”
“Shut up, Clay. Don’t talk like that.”
“Just hurry, please.”
I hit the gas. I had to get back to the house. We rode past the waterfront, downtown, and through Main Street. I wasn’t going to slow down.
I found the dirt road and sped up there faster than I should have. I parked outside the garage.
I picked up the journal. The leather spine was barely holding it together, pages were falling out all over the passenger seat. I tried to pick them all up.
“Clay!” I cried.
“No tears. Not yet.” Clay said as he faded. I took the journal and climbed up to the tree house.
“Why here?” I asked frantically. “What do you want me to do?”
“Annaka.” He faded into the world and hit the floor. “Annaka, you have to do it.”
“Do what?”
“You have to rip it.”
“No! No, we can fix it. I’ll tape it. I’ll—” I tried putting it back together. It was almost completely torn in two.
“No,” Clay cut me off. “I can’t control what’s happening anymore. If you went back again, I don’t think I could get you out. It’s too dangerous. You have to do this.” He looked me in the eye. “Please. Do it for me.”
I couldn’t. I couldn’t do it even if the world depended on it. If the journal was ripped apart, that meant Clay would….
“I can’t! I’m sorry.”
“Please, Annaka. You don’t understand what’s going to happen. I can’t stop the jumping.”
“You shouldn’t have come after me!” I shouted through my tears. “Why didn’t you just stay here?”
Clay grabbed my hand tight, blood dripping from his mouth. He looked at me, and I knew he was barely holding on. “Because I’m your co-pilot.”
Blue fog filled the air. I shut my eyes tight, knowing that everything around me was already gone.
Chapter 23
When I opened my eyes, I didn’t know where I was. I was lying on grass looking up at the Milky Way. The stars were the only lights illuminating Earth. This wasn’t a memory. This was something else.
“Clay?” I called out into the universe. I could hear my voice echo but there was no response. “Clay, where are you?”
I stood up; the sky was full of stars, the grass was dark. I looked down to see a lake.
“What’s going on here?”
There was no response.
I turned around to see two silhouettes: the tree house and the house. I walked towards the house, and went straight to the front door. When I opened it, a gust of wind splashed against me and everything was see-through; white lines outlined our home. I caught my breath and could hear a phone ringing somewhere inside. I headed for the living room, where my grandparents’ ancient black telephone was ringing off the hook. I hesitated—I didn’t know what was happening. I mustered the little courage I had left and lifted it to my ear.
“Hello?”
“Annaka.”
I heard the voice I was so afraid of forgetting: my grandfather’s. Everything inside of me fell.
“Grampy?” My voice began to whimper. “Grampy, is that you?”
“Yes. Annaka, come here.”
I heard his voice echo, and when I turned around he was sitting on the couch, his eyes looking straight into mine. Here was the familiar gentle giant of a man who was always able to put a smile on my face. But in that moment, I couldn’t smile. I
