A text arrived from Dara:
Have you told him yet? I’m about to burst. It’s December, so I hope you’ve booked your flights.
Done, and done. At least the flights, anyway. The Jake part, not so much. Telling him would make things so final.
I’ll email you the information.
I signed into my airline account and pulled up my itinerary, adding her email address, then adding the CC to Jake. One small step accomplished.
Another text arrived just as I hit send:
Please, please, talk to him. It’s getting seriously awkward. Anyway, are you just planning to appear on his doorstep?
That would be interesting, though I might get a door slammed in my face. Not that I’d blame him.
Settling in my chair again, I checked my messages from the office and then opened the schedule, making adjustments where needed and sending it out to my department.
A notification bar slid in from the right as my laptop connected to an incoming call. An unfamiliar number with a Nova Scotia prefix. I smoothed my hair and put a smile in my voice. “Amara Grant.”
“Well, hello there, Amara Grant,” Jake said in a low, level tone. “You sound perky this afternoon. I hope it has to do with your email.”
“Jake. Sorry, I thought you were someone else. What is that noise?”
“The sonar. I’m on our research vessel, so I’m using my sat phone.”
“Sorry if I bothered you at work.”
“No bother,” he said. “It’s great you’re coming out, but you’re planning to stay with Dara, right?”
“Is that what you want?”
“You sent this to both of us, but you haven’t called, so I just—”
Another voice cut in, an indistinct, garbled mash up in the background.
“Hold on.” Jakes voice faded and became muffled. “No … this call is important, so can you give me a minute? Close the door? Thanks, Josh.” He sighed. “My research assistant, asking a ton of questions. I love being the boss, but sometimes I hate being the boss.”
“Tell me about it. Anyway, this can wait. Call me later.”
“No. Tell me what you’re thinking, otherwise I’ll be fixated on this all afternoon.”
“What if I wanted to stay with you? I’m not sure where we are, you know?”
“If you stay, we could figure that out.”
“So it’s okay?”
“Hell, yeah, it is.” His voice grew lighter, almost bouncing over the airwaves. “Call you tonight?”
“I’ll be here. Talk later.”
“Bye, Mare.”
I reclined in my chair, tipping my head and tangling my fingers into my hair, the tension draining out of me as I stared at the ceiling. I’d been driving myself insane, worrying, all for nothing.
Another notification slid in at the top of my screen:
Still can’t concentrate. So much I need to know.
I closed my eyes, picturing his inquiring look; his eyes dark and serious as he paced and mussed his hair.
With a click, I opened my message app on my laptop and replied:
Know that I love you.
Sitting back, I watched the dancing ellipses:
I love you more.
Then a second text arrived:
Damn, I must be walking around with the stupidest grin on my face. Josh just asked, “Is she coming for the holidays?”
I pressed my hands to my chest, as if that could keep everything I felt contained. Then my fingers were flying over the keyboard:
I had a second interview for a job in Dartmouth. That’s who I thought was calling.
Staring at the screen, I held my breath, waiting as the ellipses danced, stopped, and then began again before disappearing. No message? Of course not. Me applying for jobs there made this too real.
Slapping my phone onto my desk, I stalked into the kitchen, clunking my mug onto the counter, immediately lifting it and inspecting the bottom for cracking. Phew. No damage. I planted my feet shoulder width apart, thrusting my shoulders back with my arms bent and raised. Breathe in. He’s at work. Breathe out. He’s busy. In. You’re the panicky party. Out. Give the man a minute.
My eyes popped open as ringing echoed down the hallway, and I lurched forward, slip-sliding down the hall to my office. Almost stumbling over my chair, I snatched up my phone just as the ringing stopped. The Missed Call notification displayed Jake’s number.
I poked at my screen, clutching the phone to my ear as it rang once, then twice, then …
“You’re moving home?” he asked in a breathless voice. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I was sorting out my life.”
“You’ve figured things out?”
This is not how I wanted to have this conversation, yet … “Enough to know I can’t overthink this. I love you, and I love Sari. That’s all I need.” A deep silence fell. “It’s too much, right? Not what you want?”
“I do want that. It’s just …” He cleared his throat. “You’re too far away. I can’t wait to see you.”
“I miss you all so much.”
“We’ve missed you,” he said. “Just a second.” Muffled voices followed. “Damn, sorry. Josh has a problem with the sonar readings.”
“You’d better go.”
“Tonight, okay? Love you, Mare.”
“Yes, tonight.” I hung up, about ready to dissolve into a gooey mess of happy tears.
Beth greeted me at her front door, arms wide open. “I’m glad you called,” she said as she hugged me. “It’s been forever.”
“Greg here?”
“No, he beat a rapid retreat due to the threat of extended girl talk.”
“Eww, girl talk! The poor guy must have been horrified.” I followed her into the living room, grateful when she poured two glasses of Pinot Grigio and handed one to me. “Thanks. You read my mind.”
Beth snickered. “Yeah, I’m a magician.”
“Close enough.” I gulped down half of my wine and sighed. “What has Greg been saying?”
“Not much. He’s remarkably tight lipped, not wanting to get stuck in the middle.” She shrugged. “I have no insight into the Jake situation, though Greg did say you visited Halifax. How am I the last to know?”
“Sorry about being a crap friend. That’s me, avoiding all the mushy stuff between you and your man.”
“It’s okay, I get it. When you told
