Evelyn tentatively massaged Jos gently, then rubbed a little harder. Just looking at her, her face intent on the task in hand but cheeks burning with heat, eyes alight with pleasure, was enough to take her right to the edge.
“Evie…don’t stop,” she panted. Sweat was prickling all over her body now, the waves of pleasure mounting. Impulsively, she grabbed the back of Evelyn’s neck and pulled her head down to her chest. “Your mouth, Evie, please,” she asked, as Evelyn understood her desire and put her mouth on her hard nipple. Another few strokes of Evelyn’s fingers and she could hold it no more. “Oh God, Evie…” she managed, before she had no more words and her climax overtook her. She shuddered, pressing her sex into Evelyn’s hand.
As her body relaxed, she took Evelyn in her arms, holding her close. In this, she surprised herself. Sex was hardly ever an emotional experience for her. True enough, most women liked to hold her when they were done and Jos usually reciprocated the superfical, fleeting affection, even found it pleasant. But now she felt as though she wanted to crush Evelyn into her body, hold her so close there was nothing between them. Evelyn looked up at her, a soft smile on her face. “Are you all right, Evie?” Jos asked.
“Oh yes,” Evelyn replied. “I’m more than all right. I don’t think I have the words.”
Jos returned the smile. “You don’t have to find words. Just stay with me.”
“I don’t want to go anywhere,” Evelyn said, settling her head against Jos’s chest.
Jos closed her eyes and stroked Evelyn’s hair. This was peace and it was something she rarely knew. There was no point questioning why she found it in the arms of a girl from the other side of the country. The question that remained was how long it would last. Because, in Jos’s experience, it was never that long.
Chapter Sixteen
When Evelyn awoke in the morning, her head was still on Jos’s shoulder and her arm draped across Jos’s chest. As her vision cleared from slumber, she raised her head to look up at Jos. Jos, already awake, looked back at her. Her expression was questioning and Evelyn suspected Jos half expected her to wake full of regret. Instead, excitement stirred in her stomach and she smiled.
“Good morning,” Jos said, relaxing noticeably at Evelyn’s obvious happiness.
“Good morning,” Evelyn replied. She pressed herself closer to Jos and luxuriated in the warmth of her body, the soft comfort of the sheets against her skin. She’d never slept naked on her own, let alone with someone else, and every sensation was new and wonderful. Briefly, she marvelled at how natural this felt, when it should have been more alien than anything that had happened since she’d been in London. But it was impossible to dwell on anything much, with Jos’s eyes on her, Jos’s hand stroking her skin softly.
Daylight was creeping around the edge of the curtains. Jos’s bedroom felt very different to how it had in the lamplight of the night before. The gin, which gave the world soft edges, was entirely worn off. Yet the pale daylight and sober morning did not detract from the glory of being here with Jos.
“You’ve not run from my bed in horror,” Jos said finally.
“No, why would I?” Evelyn replied, wondering if such a thing had happened to Jos in the past.
“I don’t know. I suppose I was frightened that in the light of day you’d feel differently. Or that you’d suddenly realise what you’d done and decide it was a step too far.”
Evelyn twisted and sat up so she could look at Jos properly. The sheets droped to reveal her naked shoulders and she had a moment of feeling vulnerable, until looking into Jos’s face made her safe and confident. “I actually wish I could just stay here with you today. I don’t want to go anywhere.”
Jos looked relieved and then smiled a more lascivious smile. “Oh, you’d like a repeat of last night, would you?” She raised a questioning eyebrow.
“Of course I would.” Evelyn paused to consider. “I never knew, I really never knew…”
“Why would you?”
“But it terrifies me to think that I could’ve gone through my whole life not knowing what it could be like. I could’ve never felt what I did last night, or what I do right now.”
Jos’s face grew more serious. “But now you do know, Evie. You don’t have to be frightened of anything.”
“Not with you here,” Evelyn replied. As long as Jos was with her, she could achieve anything.
“No, Evie. Don’t depend on me or anyone else. Just live your life.”
“I am doing,” Evelyn replied, unavoidably thinking of Edward’s words all those years ago, of her promise. She smiled to herself, thinking that this last adventure was one she would not tell her brother about. “I’m flying.”
“Like a bird?” Jos asked, apparently not quite following Evelyn’s thoughts.
“No,” Evelyn said. “Like a butterfly. Like my brooch, the one you returned to me that first night. I was wearing it because of something my brother and I talked about once. About being free to fly.”
“And you are, Evie. To fly on beautiful wings.”
Evelyn smiled. “They’re fragile wings too.” Her unpleasant dream came back to her. “I don’t know that it’s a good analogy sometimes. A butterfly is so delicate, its life so fleeting.”
“Each butterfly lives a whole lifetime. A life of flying into the sky, drinking the nectar of myriads of flowers, drifting on the breeze. A rainbow of colour.”
“I felt fragile on my own. But with you, it’s different,” Evelyn said. It was true. However much her confidence had grown during her time in London, she was still feeling a precarious loneliness, the lack of a real confidante. Now
