I dipped my head. “That, uh, didn’t work out.”
Zaan and Ian looked at each other. “I’m so glad I’m married,” Zaan said.
“You can bloody well say that again.” They clinked glasses and I didn’t know if I felt better or worse.
“So you’re done at the end of the season?” Ian asked, turning back to me.
“Yeah.”
“Have you told coach?”
“I’m not telling anyone but the three of you until later in the season. Maybe not until the season is over. Although they’re going to suspect something if I don’t renew my contract. We’ll see what my agent says.”
“I’m sorry about you and Isla, though,” Zaan said. “I thought you two were good together.”
“We are,” I mumbled. “She’s just not willing to leave her job and I can’t go to Scotland.”
“What about MI6?” Zaan teased. “You could probably become a British spy, no?”
I laughed. “I don’t know that they want a Canadian, former professional hockey player working for them, but I guess it can’t hurt to ask.”
“What about the RCMP?” Zaan asked, referring to the Royal Canadian Mounted Police.
“That would require moving back to Canada, and again, Isla’s in Scotland.”
“So the only way for you two to be together would be for you to move there?” Zaan asked in confusion. “That sounds kinda selfish.” He glanced at Ian. “Sorry, I know she’s your sister, but it does.”
Ian shrugged. “I think she’s being a bit selfish as well, but I can’t tell her that because, you know, that twin thing. She’d kill me.”
“I don’t expect you to take sides,” I told him. “It’s all good. I guess it wasn’t meant to be.”
“I wish you wouldn’t give up,” Ian said after a moment. “She loves you. I know she does, and you feel the same way about her.”
“Is your family still planning to come for the holidays?” I asked him.
He nodded. “It depends on Granddad’s health, but as far as I know, yes. They’re going to come here and then we’re all meeting in Limaj for the game.”
My heart skipped a beat and for a moment, I had hope, but then I remembered that nothing would change between now and then.
“Well, it’ll be good to see the family, but I don’t think there’s much hope for Isla and me. While there’s nothing I’m ready to talk about, I do have multiple options, but to be honest, I don’t think she’s interested in marrying a bodyguard.”
“That doesn’t sound like Isla,” Ian said. “She’s my twin, and I know her better than anyone. That’s not like her. I think it’s more about the uncertainty. She always has a plan. Like when she blurted out that you were her boyfriend to Granddad. It was impulsive and she panicked, so she immediately called me to come up with a plan. That’s how she operates. It’s the uncertainty that has her off-balance, not your career choice. She’s not petty that way.”
“Well, whatever it is, the fact that I love her apparently wasn’t enough to keep her with me. It is what it is. Might be time for a few one-night stands.”
Zaan shrugged. “I can’t think of a single one-night stand that was anywhere near as hot as the sex I have with my wife.”
“Same.” Ian nodded.
“You guys really know how to hurt a guy when he’s down, huh?” I chuckled. What else could I do?
“Hello, boys.” A pretty blonde with a smokin’ hot figure and a really low-cut dress came and stood beside us. “I’d like to believe one of the four of you would like to buy a thirsty girl a drink.”
I thought about it but then shook my head, smiling. “Not tonight, doll.”
“Did you even consider going there?” Ian asked me as she ambled off.
“Well, I’m decidedly single again,” I sighed. “But no, I’m not ready for that kind of thing. It doesn’t feel like this thing with Isla and me is over.”
“I don’t think it is either.”
I wasn’t sure what was going to happen, but once all my plans came together, I was going to give it one more shot. I wouldn’t say that out loud, because I really didn’t want to jinx it.
29
Isla
Granddad got his strength back relatively quickly, and though he was taking it easy, only going into the office once a week and working remotely two other days, he looked his age these days, which was terrifying. After losing my father, the idea of losing my grandfather as well was completely unacceptable. He was older, so it could happen, but I didn’t want to think about it. The prostate cancer had caught us all off guard, and though I still disliked his interference in my life, I understood it more now. I only wished he’d told us about the cancer.
The recovery rate for prostate cancer was high, so his chances were excellent. Luckily, it had been caught at a yearly physical, so it was early and the doctors didn’t expect it had spread. It was good news all around, despite the anemia-induced collapse, but we were all spending a lot more time with him. In fact, he’d shooed us all out of his den the other morning, claiming he had work to do, though I suspected it was more about having a little peace and quiet.
Today was Sunday and though I usually took the day off, I had what felt like a thousand papers to grade, so I was on the terrace doing that in the hopes of getting ahead of things before the new week started. It was chilly but the sun was out, so I took advantage of being outside.
There was movement behind me and I was surprised to see Granddad coming out. He sank into the chair beside mine and smiled.
“Hello, love. What’re you working on?”
“Grading papers. As usual.”
“You used to spend days off at the lab.”
“I know.” I didn’t look up, continuing to read through the paper in front of me.
“What’s going on, lass?” His voice softened. “Can’t you talk to me?”
I looked up this time. “I
