She reaches up and wipes a tear from my cheek. I didn’t even know it had fallen, it’s such a common feeling these days.
“Is that what you really think?”
What else can I? I’ve been looking around, hoping that I’d see him but knowing I don’t deserve it after shutting him out the past few days.
“Look up.” Bailey stands aside, and I gasp.
Right at the other side of the church, shadowed by overhanging trees, is a bench.
“Oh my God.”
As if he knows I’m staring at him, his head lifts from where it was hanging between his shoulders and our eyes connect.
Something crackles between us. Something I remember all too well even from that very first night.
He’s here. He came. For me.
“What do you want to do? We really need to be moving toward the wake.”
I’m silent for a beat, my connection with Corey as strong as ever, before I say words that gut me because all I want to do is run into his arms, feel his strength wrap around me, and hear promises that he’s never going to let go.
But I can’t. That can’t happen until we’ve talked, and that can’t happen until I’ve done this for my aunt. She deserves my full attention. Well, as much as I’m capable of right now.
“One thing at a time,” I say, repeating my previous words.
“Okay. So we go?”
“Yes.”
I hold his stare for one final second before breaking it and turning away from him.
A sob rumbles up my throat, but I catch it before it escapes. Everything feels wrong about walking away, but it’s all I can do right now.
“Everything okay?” I ask Bailey as she drops her cell back into her purse as the car pulls away.
“Yep. I’m good. You don’t need to be worrying about me.”
She takes my hand once again, and I blow out a breath.
Did I just make a mistake?
Chapter Twenty-Six
Corey
I fucking hate funerals. After the last one I attended, I told myself I wouldn’t go to another until it was for, God forbid, my mum or sisters. Everyone else, I’ll mourn from a distance, because even just sitting outside of one brings back haunting memories that I don’t need.
Yet outside of a funeral is exactly where I find myself.
It’s been over a week now since my last regrettable encounter with Harlow, and I’m fucking dying. My anger over what she did has somewhat diminished as my desperation has taken over.
Colton and Becks’ words from the other night are on repeat in my mind. I knew they were right the moment they said them. It’s the reason I’ve been standing on the wrong side of her front door for the past four days.
I need to see her. I need to hold her. Tell her that I’m here for anything she needs right now. But Bailey successfully kept me away. Only once did she allow me inside, and that was only because I turned up at the same time as a flower delivery.
Knowing that she’s lost someone important to her put the issue with my flat and the money into perspective. Money doesn’t matter, not in the grand scheme of things. But family, people you love? They are everything.
She doesn’t see me before the service starts, as per my intention. I need to be here for her, but equally, I don’t want to be a distraction. She needs to say goodbye and do what she needs to do. There’s time for us after.
I’ll be waiting.
I’ll do whatever it takes, because while I might have tried to turn a blind eye to what was developing between us while we were spending time together, it was impossible to ignore when it was gone.
I’ve missed a lot of things in my life. My family when I was on tour. My boys after the accident. My mum and sisters now. English chocolate. Fry-ups. But none of it compared to the massive hole she left when I ruined what we had. It was like a dark crater I was teetering on the edge of.
I’d been in that dark, lonely place before. It was not somewhere I was going to fall willingly this time.
I had to fight.
So, I’m here.
Waiting. Giving us a chance. Because, hell, we both deserve it. We’ve only skimmed the surface of my issues, and I fear the same can be said for Harlow. But together, we just make sense. We see the darkness within each other’s souls, and we understand it. We accept it. We embrace it. And fuck, I need that back.
My heart is damn near beating out of my chest when people start emerging from around the back of the church. My palms begin to sweat as I wait to see her once again.
I was here when she first arrived. Although she looked exhausted, devastated about all of this, she was also just as beautiful as she was the first night I laid eyes on her. My need for her has only grown stronger as our time together has gone on.
I don’t miss her looking around as people try to engage her in conversation.
Is she looking for me? Did Bailey tell her I’d be here?
I get my answer when Bailey leaves her little choice but to find me. Part of me wants to run when our eyes lock, but my muscles turn to stone as we stare at each other.
My fists clench.
Fuck, I need her.
I’m just about to push from the bench and walk over to take her in my arms when she turns away from me, dismissing me without a second thought.
Pain sears through my chest. I know that she has no idea how hard just being here is for me, she has no reason to, but still, fuck. It hurts.
I lift my hand to rub at the ache in my chest, hoping that it will abate, but it never does.
My phone vibrating in my pocket distracts me and I pull it out.
A little hope creeps in when I find Bailey’s name staring back at
