I shuddered, determined to leave it where it belonged and focus on what was right here, right now.
Little Mouse.
“You even like that bubble gum pop shit?” A look of disgust formed on my face, and she laughed as a remixed eighties song reached its awful chorus.
“All music is powerful. Look at Pink: totally underrated for years. She was considered a pop princess when she came out but her songs empower millions of people around the world. My mom pretty much raised me on her.”
I waited, still skeptical, before the ghost of a condescending smile lingered on my lips.
“Hold on.” She walked to her bag and pulled out her phone, searching through music until she found the song she was looking for. Pink’s smooth vocals echoed between us, the lyrics taking over the quiet room, as the two of us sat there absorbing the lyrics. “This song is called Chaos and Piss.”
When the song ended, she looked at me, eyes soft but just as piercing as they usually were. I tipped my head to the side, admiring her like a complex puzzle to figure out.
“You pick this for a reason?” I asked, voice lowering an octave. I couldn’t shake the feeling that she’d chosen this one because it reminded her of someone. Maybe me.
“Not initially,” she admitted.
I broke into a roar of laughter, not giving a shit even if she’d had me in mind when she’d chosen this song. She thought I was dark now? She didn’t know the half of it.
My phone went off and my laugh was cut short when I moved to the kitchen table to grab it. I breathed easier when my mom told me that Tammy was improving rapidly. When I hung up a moment later, I relayed the new information to Maddison. “That was my mom. She says Tammy is heading home in the morning. She’s going to stay at the hospital with her tonight.”
“Oh, Kyler, that’s great.”
“Yeah.” I shrugged before moving back to the plush rug and skimming the music again. “I think I should show you some real music.”
“Pink is real music. Thank you very much.” She shot a pout at me.
“You’re pretty cute when you’re tryin’ to be bratty. These rich chicks are really rubbing off on you,” I said, before quickly adding, “The brat part, not the cute part. I have a feeling that cute quality is all you.” I sat there, her eyes burning right through me.
“Cute, huh?” A frown darted across her face. “Why does that sound like an insult coming from you, Kyler Sinclair?”
My grin cocked to one side, the realization that she was right not surprising at all, the realization that she knew me better than I thought, totally. “Hate to say it, but in this case...” I bit down on my lip ring before moving in slowly, one fingertip tucking a stray strand of her hair behind her ear.
A visible shudder passed through her that seemed to jump the barrier of space between us.
She sucked in a slow breath, eyes laser-focused on my bottom lip. I grinned, tugging the loop between my teeth to play with it a moment before doing the only thing I’d been thinking of and pressed my lips to hers in a feathery kiss.
I was frozen at first, unmoving, with the shock of her silky flesh against mine. I brushed the tip of my tongue along the seam, probing gently before I got greedy and pushed my way in with force. Her body swayed against mine, relaxing when my hands slid up her arms, over her shoulders and then grazed her bare clavicle.
“Kyler…” My name was so wispy on her lips I nearly lost my mind.
I groaned in her mouth, thrusting my tongue deeper, tasting her in deft strokes, demanding and wild, angry with her for making me feel this way. She tasted so good, I hated that I liked everything about her so much.
“Say it again,” I hushed, thumbs stroking the arch of her neck.
Shudders of desire prickled her skin before she whispered again, “Kyler…”
I felt my fucking heart lodge in my throat, overwhelming sensations vibrating through every part of me.
Because of her.
The mouse.
“Jesus.” The cold truth of us doused my senses. “Jesus Christ, what was I thinking?”
I dropped her face from my palms, missing her silky skin under my fingers instantly. I shook my head, unable to look her in the eye before backing away, violent huffs of breath surging through my lungs before I spun, fighting the urge to storm out of my own house. I didn’t care where I went, as long as it took me as far away from the mouse as I could get.
A chill of hate soaked my bones like my favorite blanket.
“You should go.” I crossed to the opposite side of the kitchen. The look on her face was a medley of pain, shock, lust and hate. I hoped the hate would win out and she would stay the fuck away from me.
I was fucked up, complicated. She was something good in the world. I would just ruin her--destroy her, until she was nothing. Her light would be ground up into dust under the heavy hand of my issues.
The tears streaming down her face made me feel like the monster I was. I wanted to go to her, to tell her I was sorry but the truth was, she wasn’t broken yet, she was just bent, and if I went to her, I would eventually break her into a thousand tiny pieces.
Solidifying me as an asshole forever.
“Please leave.” The words softly flowed from my lips, my eyes glued on her shattered face.
I was an asshole.
“You have some serious issues, you know that?”
“Yeah, I know.
