He turned his head to look. Chairs and tables. Empty plates and stacked cutlery. It sent no thrill through him at all. “I’m done with this,” he told her. “It’s over.”
“You’ll be back,” she told him. “Just as soon as the excitement with your farm girl has worn off. She can’t keep you happy, Logan. You and I both know that. You’re a man that likes to get things done. What will you do there, spend your life changing diapers? You’re better than that.”
“There’s nothing better than that,” he told her. And he knew it was true. He didn’t need a week to think about it. Everything he wanted was in Hartson’s Creek. The woman he loved, the baby he knew he would be crazy over.
His whole damn heart.
“You’ll regret it,” she told him. “You will. Nothing will ever feel as good as this does. We’re vampires, Logan. We feed off this high.”
He shook his head. “I used to be. Once. But now I realize how crazy that is. Working like a madman just to make a few more bucks. To get our name in the paper and all over the city. But that doesn’t keep you warm at night. It doesn’t fill your heart. Not like family and love and knowing there’s a little piece of you growing inside of the woman you love.”
She blinked, her mouth tight. “So you really are doing this, huh?”
Yeah, he was leaving this behind. And going to Hartson’s Creek. He was in love with Courtney Roberts. All he wanted to do was take care of her and their baby.
Now he just needed to find a way to persuade her that he meant it.
Chapter Thirty
Giving somebody space was much harder than it sounded once you realized you want to spend the rest of your life with them. Logan barely slept on Saturday night, and Sunday was a blur of breakfast with the family at his favorite Boston diner, followed by farewells as most of his family left for the airport to head home, while Cam was leaving with the team for a football game the following evening.
That left Logan alone in Boston, with his thoughts and the knowledge that he had five days to decide how to make this better. Every few minutes his fingers would reach for his phone, his resolve wavering as he thought about calling her.
He wanted to hear her voice. There was an ache in his heart that wouldn’t go away, no matter how much he tried to ignore it. He knew that talking to her would soothe it. Make it all feel better.
But she’d asked for him to take some time and he was going to do that for her. For a little while, at least.
Walking toward the floor-to-ceiling windows that gave him a perfect view of Boston sprawling out beneath him, he leaned his head on the glass, his breath fogging it as he exhaled heavily. It was impossible to remember the last time he’d actually had time on his hands to think. Cam probably would tell him that was dangerous. The corner of his mouth lifted as he thought of his twin.
Cam had been right yesterday when he’d told Logan that he needed to let go of the outcome. But it was almost impossible not to wonder how to fix this thing between them. Standing here in an apartment he didn’t want to live in, looking down at a city he didn’t feel part of anymore, more than anything he wanted to fix it.
But first he needed to work on himself.
Needed to accept that he couldn’t control everything the way he’d always tried to do. He wasn’t perfect, his life wasn’t perfect, and no amount of pushing himself to the extreme was going to make it that way.
Courtney and the baby though, were everything. And he felt blessed that they’d always have this connection between them. Even if she decided she didn’t want to be with him, they’d both be with their child.
Yeah, thinking like that hurt like hell. He wanted to be with her, for Christ’s sake. But he couldn’t make her want to be with him, and he wouldn’t want to. If they were going to be together, it had to be because they both wanted it.
She had a past. One that had pain and happiness in it. It was what made her who she was. This amazingly beautiful, clever, funny woman who ran into his life when he’d least expected it. She’d made everything seem more real, more focused. It was as though he’d been waiting for her all this time and hadn’t realized it.
He pushed himself off the window, his hand leaving an outline on the glass. He’d agreed to give her space, but that didn’t mean he had to sit around doing nothing. First of all, he’d go for a run. An easy one, because his knee would never be what it used to be. And then he’d sit down and make a list.
Not because he wanted to control the outcome, but because he had things he needed to do. A business to withdraw from. A house in his hometown to find. People he needed to get to know.
And a baby to prepare for.
That wasn’t controlling anything. It was being a good father and co-parent.
She’d asked for space and he’d give it to her. But in five days he hoped like hell she’d give him some time for them to talk.
Maybe then the ache in his chest would start to fade away.
He grabbed his phone and quickly pulled up the contact he was looking for, swiping to connect the call. He lifted the phone to his ear, his heart in his mouth as he waited for her to answer.
“The I Can Make You Beautiful salon. Lainey speaking.”
“Hey, Lainey. This is Logan. I need your advice on something.”
It was unseasonably warm for January. Courtney didn’t need to
