“Only three days ago,” he said, with a dazed look in his eye. “It is strange being back.” Even though Zawne had been a pampered prince all his life, he seemed somewhat uncomfortable on the dainty sofa in my living room, surrounded by frilly throw pillows. He probably never saw a pillow during his Aska training. It made me appreciate what I had. I understood how fortunate I was, especially compared to the rest of Geniverd.
“I’m curious about one thing,” I said. “Why was your first order of business to have a date with me?”
I wanted to cut through the formalities right away, no mucking around. I needed to know Zawne’s intentions before we proceeded. He had had a reputation in college, bedding girls by the dozen, playing the field, and never settling down. I was sure Lordin had changed him for the better. But without Lordin, after being pummeled by the Aska training, who was Zawne now? Who was the muscled man bent in front of my fireplace, drying himself by the fire as if still in the wild?
“Can I be honest?” he asked. His eyes were dark and mysterious.
I gulped and nodded.
“Good,” he said, “because if we are to be man and wife, we should begin with honesty. I don’t know you well, Kaelyn, and you don’t know me, but Lordin trusted you, and that makes you my number one choice for a wife. You’re also beautiful, one of the most breathtaking women I have ever seen in my life. I caught myself thinking of you on occasion while I labored in Lodden. I would be at the watering hole, wondering to myself, ‘Where is Kaelyn right now? I wonder what she’s wearing.’”
I blushed. Surely he was lying. He could not have been thinking about me in Lodden!
“There is also the power of our alliance to consider,” Zawne said, casting his gaze into the fire and glowering. “I hate the idea of arranged marriages. I really do. I would prefer people marry for love rather than power. Yet it is my responsibility to lead. That is what it means to be an Aska and an heir. I must be a leader of men. With the coronation ceremony only three weeks away, I must cast aside foolish pride and seek a wife. I must at least attempt the throne.”
Zawne’s honorable words were making me feel guilty. All I wanted was to follow my heart, while he was willing to sacrifice his personal feelings for the good of the people. I found myself thinking, Of course Lordin loved him. He’s selfless. He’s a hero.
My mouth moved without consulting my brain. “If the future of Gaard is at stake, I should also attempt the throne. I have a vision for this kingdom, and I would like to see it realized. It’s taken your bravery to rouse my own. Yet all the same, I cannot marry a man if there is no chance of love. I refuse to be an emotional outcast in a loveless marriage.”
“I understand,” he said. Then Zawne smiled for the first time. In the glow of the fire, he was rugged and tanned, sultry, like a romantic lumberjack. And so defined! His muscles were hard and rippled as he moved. I wanted to touch them … just a little.
“If that’s the case,” he said, “then I better make you love me tonight. I’m talking about here and now, Kaelyn, for the sake of Geniverd. Just give me the night to make you see that we can be lovers.”
I gave him a warm smile and said, “I’d like that,” meaning it sincerely. It was kind of what I had planned, anyway—one date to see if love was possible, then shirk my usual timidity and dive headfirst into a relationship for once in my life. He was rugged, handsome, and apparently caring. If Lordin could love Zawne, why couldn’t I?
“Do we have a deal?” he asked through his grin.
I nodded. “Yes, Zawne, we have a deal.”
“Great!” He rubbed his hands together. “This is going to be a perfect union. Mama and Papa will be so proud.”
Zawne stood up, brushed his hands on his pants, and stepped closer to me. He was so tall. I had to tilt my head to look in his eyes. “You’ll see,” he said. “I will be a great husband. I can protect you, love you, care for you. I can be an ear, a friend, a partner. It will be fantastic. Lordin always used to say …” He trailed off. He must have seen the subtle crinkle in my brow at the mention of her name. Of course, he would always think fondly of Lordin, but this was our first date. I preferred not to talk about Zawne’s true love. I didn’t want to picture Lordin rolling in her grave as her fiancé tried to seduce me.
“It’s all right,” I said, moving away from Zawne and plunking myself down on the sofa, crossing my legs. “You mourn her still, I’m sure. But it’s something we can get past. My wise brother told me yesterday how it’s all part of life. I never expect you to forget Lordin, but while you’re with me, could we at least not talk about her?”
“Of course.” He bowed to me. “My apologies, Kaelyn. Please forgive me.”
His seriousness made me giggle. When he bowed, his abs were more defined, water droplets weaving through his coarse body hairs. “You are forgiven,” I said. But he was more than forgiven. I already liked Zawne a lot. His muscles, his charm, his determined soul. In that moment, I wanted them all to be mine.
We weren’t even hungry. At least, neither of us admitted to being hungry. I poured two glasses of wine, and we curled closely together
