“It was and it wasn’t,” I said. It was a little embarrassing to tell Roki I had screamed at my mother, “He’s perfect!” Instead, I said, “It was more of the same, the same argument we’ve been having a lot lately. You know, about the expectations my parents have for me to become clan leader, even to become queen. I’m just so tired of it, Roki. People think I’m set for life because of who I am. Mama tells me I should be excited about all the prospects I have, about all the potential suitors. All I want to do is hide under my bed. There must be more to life. There must be more than ceremonies and extravagant balls and fancy retreats all over Geniverd.”
I knew by Roki’s gentle expression that he understood what I was saying. Roki always got me. It was like he was tuned in to my frequency. He raised his bushy eyebrows and let me go on ranting.
“Mama’s just mad because I’m not as good as Raad,” I said. “She’s also scared that if Gaard doesn’t produce a king or queen soon, our family will be deposed, demoted to simple folk. Oh gosh, the horror! Mama always talks about how our lineage is cursed. It’s a ridiculous thought. We aren’t cursed just because I reject the path I’m supposed to follow.”
“Why do you think that is?” Roki asked, back to admiring the roses. “Why do you reject what’s expected of the First Daughter of Gaard?”
“Maybe I don’t want to be the First Daughter of Gaard.” I hung my head. Roki was trying to be sweet by asking me how I felt about everything, about my life, but it was just making me depressed. “I hate how Mama wants to sell me off to the Shondur Clan like I’m a tool for trading. She wants me to marry Jaken or Zawne so that I’m in a better position to be chosen at the coronation in three years.”
“Of course she’d want you to marry a prince.” Roki raised his eyebrow. “It’s been nearly forty years since the last coronation. Wow.”
“Yes,” I said. “A little over three years until the Crown of Crowns swoops down from the sky and lands on the head of the chosen one. Papa told me stories about the last coronation. He said it had been amazing to watch. He said that the bird had soared from the sky, seemingly from no place at all, and landed on the heirs of Shondur. They were made queen and king instantly. That was thirty-seven years ago.”
A quirky smile came to Roki’s lips. “I do wonder where that bird comes from. It’s a real mystery,” he said. Then he plucked a rose from the flower bed and gave it to me. “Here, a beautiful rose for a beautiful girl.”
I smiled, twirled the rose in my fingers, and said, “I prefer to be with you. I don’t want to marry Jaken or Zawne.”
“I don’t want you to either.”
“And who knows?” I said with a sudden burst of energy. “Maybe if you divulge your intentions to Mama and Papa, and we are officially together when the time of the ceremony comes, the Crown of Crowns will land on your head. Can you imagine it, Roki, you and me as king and queen? We could make the kingdom a better place. We could make Geniverd better for the common man, try to loosen the stranglehold the upper class has over society, and make Decens-Lenitas more accessible for everyone. Think about it, Roki.”
Roki laughed somewhat sadly. “If only that could be. Let’s try not to think about it. Gaard-Ma and Gaard-Elder would never allow our official union.”
“In that case,” I said, giving Roki a playful look, “I’ll marry another clan head and take you for my secret lover.”
“Your lover!”
“Sure. Why not? Mama told me a story once about a woman who was promised to marry an heir—I can’t remember which one. Anyway, the promise was revoked at the last minute, and the woman felt horribly scorned. Then the heir became king. He took the woman as his one and only mistress, loving her more fiercely than he loved his own wife, the queen. Then, um … Shoot, I forget the rest.”
I stopped and scratched my eyebrow. It was hard to remember all the details. Mama had told me the story so long ago. In my brief confusion, Roki watched me with a smile. He was always so courteous.
“Oh,” I said, “that’s right. What happened was the Gaard-Ma at the time needed the mistress’s help. See, the mistress had a huge influence over the king, more so than the queen did. Gaard-Ma beseeched the mistress to sway the king’s mind over some land acquisitions he was trying to make near Cara. He wanted to steamroller farmlands and absorb them into Cara. He wanted to make the world’s capital even bigger while displacing hundreds of Gaard farmers.
“The mistress refused Gaard-Ma’s request. She claimed the king needed that land and there was nothing anyone could do about it. Well, Gaard-Ma was known for her vengeance. All Gaard-Mas are. She started a rumor among the upper class. She denounced the mistress as a harlot and a thief, a traitor to the king and a schemer against all the people of Geniverd. After the rumor spread throughout the kingdom, the king had no choice but to banish his beloved mistress. She was forced to live in the bitter highlands in the north of Gaard. Her climb to the top ended in misery.”
Roki gave me a puzzled look. “Are you saying you want to have me as your lover just so you can banish me?”
“No!” I latched onto him, bucking against his chest. “I just thought the story related to our talk. I could never banish you, Roki! Not
