This morning, Hero had given birth, three weeks early, to a baby girl and so, quite rightly, had to cancel at the last minute. I said it was perfectly okay under the circumstances and I was honoured to share my own son’s birthday with such a special little girl.
I have just one question for you
She had texted back.
How would you feel if I called her Meghan?
I had taken a moment to think before I had replied.
It will suit her perfectly.
She sent an emoji heart back.
I knew I was leaving behind that chapter of my life; Meghan was the woman I was then. I didn’t feel it at the time, but I had been strong. I had been stronger than I had known. But Regi was who I was now. Now I worked as a barista at the trendy artisan café that Will and I had our Sunday brunch date in. I work there by day and will start university in the evenings from September. I discovered I prefer studying by night. I have also discovered a new love for latte art. I won Barista of the Month several times in a row. Having a job has left me with less time to think. Less time to spend on Instagram.
Mini, who was still living with Karen and I at the house, was running late as some sort of disastrous date last night had set her back. I had arrived half an hour earlier than everyone else so that I could have the picnic set up. I had bought white paper plates with a floral design and matching napkins. I had made my own bunting at college on the sewing machines and erected a few short poles to which I attached it to.
I looked up towards the sun again and closed my eyes. As I did, something immediately blocked out the rays I had been enjoying. I opened my eyes expecting to see that the sun had gone behind a cloud and instead I saw the warm and familiar smile of the face that I had been seeing a lot more of these days.
‘Hello, Regi.’ Will beamed down at me.
‘Hello, Will,’ I said politely back, even though we had gone way beyond such formalities.
Will kissed me softly on my lips, then sat down and tucked straight into an egg-and-cress sandwich. I watched the way he ate the triangle in two bites, dusted down his jeans and grinned at me.
I thought about how far I had come in a few short months and how a lot of it had to do with Will. When I had explained everything to him, he was so understanding, more so than I thought any person could be.
I looked up and another tall figure loomed over me. I saw a man in the boy I once knew. It hadn’t yet sunk in and every time I saw Jack, my heart skipped a beat over how much he had grown. He was so handsome, yet he was also a good soul. Kind and thoughtful. Lee had done a good job with him these last few years.
‘Hello, Mum.’ His voice squeaked where it was still trying to deepen.
I jumped to my feet and embraced him as hard as I had been doing for the last four months, knowing there was still another part of me that was living and breathing and that was worth sticking around for.
Will and Jack gave each other a friendly slap on the arm and Jack sat down and looked at the food in front of him.
‘You can start,’ I said to him and my heart swelled at his patience and manners. ‘It is your birthday. Sweet sixteen.’ I ruffled his hair, an act that still felt awkward for me, but I still craved it. Jack smiled not showing any signs of embarrassment.
Will pulled out some paraphernalia from his front pocket that was obviously causing him discomfort: his phone, keys and some loose change. He put it all on his paper plate in front of him and lay down on his side. I looked at the pile of loose change, and spotted several pound coins strewn around. I edged my way closer to the plate.
Suddenly I heard the words: ‘Don’t do it,’ spoken in unison. I looked at both Will and then Jack, who I both adored and respected. I looked at the messy coins and felt the familiar yearning rear itself and then I looked back at the gentle kind faces next to me. ‘I won’t,’ I said.
Acknowledgments
Writing a book is a hard task at the best of times, but when the world has shut down, jobs are being lost, children have lost out on education and aren’t socialising with their friends; when the world is paralysed with fear, then it became really difficult to write a book. Despite the hurdles, the emotional stress and the constant distractions of having three children at home asking for a snack every 17 seconds, I managed to formulate 90 or so thousand words into a story, which I hope you enjoyed.
There are the usual few to thank for helping me get my third book to publication, but during these exceptional times, the team at Boldwood did a fantastic job at keeping us writers employed! During a time when many were (and still are at time of writing) losing jobs, homes and businesses, Boldwood were taking huge strides to keep our books on shelves and Kindles across the world. I am extremely grateful to Amanda Ridout for keeping in touch regularly over the lockdown months and to Nia Beynon for doing all that she does (which is a lot) but particularly for working tirelessly with the
