I’m outside mowing her lawn when I see the curtain’s twitch. She’s watching me. Good. I want her to see that I’m not going anywhere. She means too damn much for me to let her get away.
At nine, she comes out of the house for the first time in days and gets into her car. She starts it, and it sputters then dies. She tries it again, and it won’t turn over. Sounds like a bad alternator… something I can easily fix if she’ll let me.
She bangs her head on the steering wheel before picking up her phone and dialing someone. Five minutes later, the Sugar Plumb van pulls up, and Ana escapes into it, not looking my direction once. Prue gives me a meaningful look then drives off with my heart.
I tow Ana’s car to the shop and not only fix the alternator but give the whole thing a tune-up. I replace several wires and belts and change all of the fluids. By the time I’m done, the engine is purring like a kitten, better than the day it was driven off the lot. I drive the car back to her house and replace the spare car key on the hook before locking up her house again. A house that was starting to feel like home to me.
I hop on my bike and head to the diner. Even if she won’t talk to me, I can at least see her. She gives me a scowl like the old days when I sit in her section. She says something to Daisy, the other waitress on shift, and Daisy heads my way.
“Why don’t you move on over to my section, sugar.”
I shake my head. “I’m fine here.”
She shakes her head. “You hurt my girl bad. I won’t stand by and watch you hurt her more.”
“I didn’t mean to hurt her. She misunderstood the conversation. I didn’t even know that was the reason Ruth bought the house. I thought it just looked like Ana’s dream house.”
“And what about fixin’ it up? That’s a bit farther than sellin’ a house.”
I nod. “It is, but I want her to have everything her heart desires. Fixing the house how she wants is a small thing.”
Daisy snorts. “Just like fixin’ her car without her knowledge? Don’t think half the town doesn’t know what you did and what you’re tryin’ to do to make it right.”
“I didn’t do it for any reason other than wanting to take care of Ana. She’s the best thing that ever happened to me, and I’ll do anything… anything for her.”
“Good. You just keep doin’ what you’re doin’. She’ll come around.”
Ana finally comes to my table when Daisy tells her I refuse her service. I remind myself to give her a free oil change next time she comes into the shop.
“What do you want?” Ana asks, sounding peeved.
“To talk.”
She shakes her head, exasperated. “Not going to happen. Anything from the menu, or would you mind clearing out of my table so I can get some paying customers?”
“I’ll have some of your biscuits and gravy.”
Ana rolls her eyes. “You know that’s not on the menu. I can get you some of Amos’ biscuits if you’d like.”
“I suppose.”
She stomps off, writing down my ticket. I can imagine her writing a note to make my food extra special… like dropped on the floor or spit in. Thank God Amos is my friend and wouldn’t dare do such a thing. Though his wife is Ana’s best friend and he does have a soft spot for my girl. Maybe I won’t eat after all.
Ana is home a few hours later and notices that her car is backed into her driveway instead of pulled forward like normal—the only note I left letting her know that her car was fixed. She looks over at me, where I’m in the driveway giving my bike a tune-up it doesn’t need just so I can catch a glimpse of my girl.
She chews on her bottom lip, then opens her car door and starts it. When it starts without issue, she lays her head on her steering wheel, and I think she’s crying, but I can’t tell from here. She stays like that for a long minute, then stands and goes into her house, not looking my direction once.
An hour later, there is a knock on my door. She’s already gone by the time I get there, but a dish with biscuits and gravy is sitting on the porch with a piece of paper taped to it that says, ‘thank you.’
The car was a peace offering of sorts. The biscuits are an acceptance of that. Progress. Slow, but progress just the same.
13
Ana
It’s hard to stay mad at someone who is doing everything in their power to show you how much they care. Carson has been a steady force of nature in my life since I threw him out. If I’m honest with myself, I’ve regretted it every single day, but I can’t seem to make my way past my hurt to forgive and forget. Every time I think I am ready to talk to him again, which is basically every time I see him, I talk myself out of it.
I didn’t realize it until now, but part of the reason I’ve not had a relationship until Carson is because I’m afraid to get hurt. Probably damage leftover from my dad abandoning me after my mom died… Love is scary. The feeling is too big, too powerful, and I don’t know how to cope with the possibility that I could have it and then lose it. Which is almost funny considering I’m in love with Carson and have pushed him away all on my own.
I let out a sigh as I get ready for work, wondering if he’ll show
