I didn’t really have a choice about that, because I can’t decide if the sun rises in the west either.
My father had told me about Kate Smith.
She was the second assistant to his lawyer, Rory James, whose only job seemed to be entertaining the meeting attendees. He wasn’t sure if Mr. James was just trying to give the meetings some sort of Asian flair or that there was more to the young woman. So he tasked me with finding out more about Kate Smith to make sure this lawyer was just trying to be respectful.
I had met Rory James a few times before he hired Kate and was immediately sure it wasn’t just that. At the end of my research, I hoped he would be more thorough in his work.
Kate Smith was an orphan. She was found in a traffic accident as the sole survivor of two occupants. Her mother had died by the time the ambulance arrived. There was no paperwork, and the police had not investigated further after the child was turned over to the orphanage. The only thing they knew about Kate was her name, since she knew it herself, and her birthday. This was not enough to find out who she was. At that time, she had been five years old, and I had started my senior year in high school. She spent the rest of her life in an orphanage. She was never adopted. Probably that was because she was damaged goods.
At least that was the entry in her file. As a child with terrible trauma who had nightmares almost every night, she had been challenging to place. She had even been returned once by the people who wanted to adopt her. Her nightmares had also been the reason why the other children avoided her.
For this reason, the orphanage tolerated Kate spending a lot of time with the janitor: a man named Watanabe, who taught her Japanese.
When I presented my results to my father, a smile appeared on his face. He even seemed pleased, if not impressed, with Rory James’ ingenuity.
However, the girl had to disappear, since spying on us would never be tolerated, no matter what. When my father made this decision regarding Kate, I had never met her before. Nevertheless, my father’s order hit me deeper than I had expected. The head of my family did not miss my hesitation.
“Do you disapprove of my decision, son?” he asked me, and I begged forgiveness, for hesitation was tantamount to disobeying orders.
“She is an innocent child, father,” I replied. “Moreover, she might prove useful. A white woman who knows Japanese is a trump card. James has correctly identified this.”
Scrutinizingly, my father, looked at me, and I could tell he recognized my true motives.
With a sharp nod, he gave me permission to do whatever I saw fit. This only showed me how much he valued me and my abilities. It wasn’t until that moment that I allowed myself to feel more for Kate Smith, and I realized how strong my interest in the lonely girl with the sun-kissed hair already was.
I didn’t just have to have her. I wanted her. The realization that I could have her was like a rush unknown until that moment.
But Kate Smith could not be mine until I would be absolutely sure her loyalty was all mine.
Still, I did my best to let my mind guide me.
Since my father wanted me to be his deputy and heir, it went without saying that I would attend all of his appointments as soon as possible. Besides, I had grown up bilingual, and my English was nearly impeccable. No one in the office would suspect anything.
When the day came that I would see Kate for the first time, I was actually a little nervous. It was a mixture of anticipation, curiosity, and hope.
Would she live up to the image I had formed from her file, testimonials, photos, and social media?
Or would I be disappointed? If that was the case, my task of breaking her would be much more challenging—at least that’s what I thought at that time.
However, it was the other way around.
When I entered the meeting room, I already knew where she would be standing. Still, I couldn’t just walk past her without a quick glance at her and a brief eye contact. That would be all I needed to determine if I was correct in my assessment.
I could feel her gaze in my bones. Sadness surrounded her like a fading perfume. Kate Smith was so young; she seemed so innocent. Yet it was her eyes that broke my heart. The blue in her eyes looked to me like a raging sea that reigned beneath Kate’s surface. I just knew it.
At that moment, as we looked at each other, I knew there was no way back for me.
And yet, I had to control myself because I had a net to cast I couldn’t let her notice. I took a month to ensure there would be two meetings. Within those four weeks, I became her unnoticed shadow. I followed her to work in the morning and during her morning chores as well as her errand for lunch.
Kate Smith functioned like clockwork. After a week, I already knew her daily routines, so the second week, I took advantage of the time to look around her apartment. She lived in a cheap apartment complex that my family had just purchased. We were going to redesign the whole neighborhood bit by bit.
Kate had one of the smallest apartments, but it was furnished. It was very worn, but she kept it extremely clean and tidy. Her clothes seemed too big for her, which made me suspect that she must have gotten most of them from the thrift store.
Although extremely successful, this firm seemed to pay her a downright pittance. For some reason, this made me angry. Before I knew it, I found myself sniffing a blouse of hers that Kate had hung to
