There he is.
The ridiculously popular man of my dreams has a lucky brunette pinned to a wall. The way Nicholas Cocker kisses isn’t like anyone else. You don’t have to be the recipient of his attention to know that he is skilled. Screw the cover fee for alcohol. Billy should charge a ticket for this show.
Nicholas is dressed in a stylish button-up, the sleeves rolled to mid-perfect-forearm since it’s so warm in here. Although I think the heat is all from him.
His jeans should be hung in the High Museum of Art. Yes, the people who named it didn’t know it would make the house of culture sound stoned. But his ass should be on display there because I am buzzed just by the sight.
How his hands move over that lucky woman’s body inspires an involuntary shiver of I-wish-that-were-me.
And my heart sinks to a depth unsustainable. This is why I avoid these parties, though I won’t tell Denise, that man is my downfall. For some reason I believe that if I don’t say it aloud, maybe one day this crazy instinct that we’re supposed to be together, will finally disappear. I used to believe in it, but after seeing his tongue shoved in so many mouths…kinda hard to dream.
As gorgeous as Nicholas is, and as much as his smile seems genuine, his friendship with Matthew real and good, I do not believe he knows how to love. He wants this superficial bang-em-and-leave-em game, and to me it’s empty. To him it’s life.
I may not look like someone who walked off a magazine cover, but I could make him laugh if he’d let me.
What would it be like to be kissed by him? Molded by his fingers? Grinded against like some prize-winning salsa dancer is showing me his moves? Nicholas kisses with such fluidity, she’s practically cumming in front of everyone.
Sigh.
Motherfucking sigh sigh sigh.
Madison.
Come on.
Don’t do this to yourself.
I drop my proud gaze to the floor.
“Maddie?” Denise gently says.
“Huh?” I look over, quickly hiding my discouragement. “What?”
“You look like someone broke your heart.”
CHAPTER 2
M ADISON
I shrug, “Just need a drink. Tired of this line, if you can call it that. Do something, would ya?”
Waving those purple fingernails Denise starts shouting, “Come on, move! Lady with a baby! And that baby needs a drink!”
People laugh like she’s kidding.
Pointing to her belly she cocks a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. “You think this is fat? I’m five months in!”
Horrified, they give her room as I maintain total poker-face.
“This is more like it!” Denise grumbles as she picks up the pretty blue bottle of Bombay Sapphire gin. “They thinkthat’s sad? The real tragedy is that if I were preggers it’d have to be immaculate conception. I haven’t had a man in me in a year.”
I hand over two red cups, glancing back to Nicholas. “Ditto.”
She grabs the ice bucket. “By choice!”
“Mine is by their choice.”
“I hate plastic cups. I’m not in college anymore! Oh well, hold these. They won’t stay up.”
“No, I can’t drink gin. It makes me do stupid things.”
Denise laughs, “Honey, your favorite word is no!”
“No.”
“Do I have to spill this on your head?”
“No.”
“Very funny.” She plants the cups in my hands and starts shoveling ice. “This is one of the things I love about Billy. He knows the first thing you run out of at a party is ice, but never at his! The man has a plan. Cuts the corners of what doesn’t matter and ensures we have what does. Except I wouldn’t mind wrapping my manicure around some actual glassware.”
“Probably afraid people will break it and get cut, bleed everywhere.”
She pauses. “Ew.” Then goes back to pouring gin.
“Denise!”
“This one’s mine,” she reassures me, and pours into the other cup—mine.
“Denise!”
“Whoopsie!”
“You said—”
“—I said that one’s mine. And it is. It’s just as full as yours is. Do I lie? No, I do not lie! Tonic or soda?”
“Tonic is bad for you.”
“Soda then.” She splashes Pellegrino water into the tiny space left in our cups. Some chick with a stick up her ass penguins closer, staring at Denise.
“What do you want?” I ask Stick-up-butt.
Denise smiles, “Are you wondering when I’m due?” Squeezing a lemon in her gin, she announces, “Four months. Cheers!”
“To little junior coming out okay despite this!” I tap my cup to hers and we drink.
Shocked and appalled, Stick-up-butt penguins away to gossip about us.
Denise smirks, “That girl needs to get laid even more than you do.”
I nod, wincing at the strong taste, “Oh God, give me a lemon. That was harsh.”
“I appreciate you taking one for the team, sucking that down sans fruit. I thought about grabbing one for you but there was no time.”
I dryly mutter, “It was worth it,” squeezing a fresh, juicy wedge and dropping it in.
With pursed, full lips, Denise cocks her pretty head. “Can I just?” Impatient fingernails rummage through my hair until she’s gifted it a deep side-part. “That’s better, sexier.” Taking a big sip, she glances around. “Now who can we hook you up with tonight?” She spots the host walking by and shouts, “Billy, baby, come back to me!”
Shocked, I whisper in her ear under the loud music, “You’re not hooking me up with Billy!”
“Hell no. He’s mine, if I ever decide to go there.”
With a grin he negotiates his way over to us. “Denise!” Taking her glass, Billy sips it. “Strong, that’s my girl! Did you try my meatballs yet?”
“I might…if you bought me a sparkly for right here.” She points to above her knuckle, left hand, on the finger conspicuously next to the pinky. “Until that day comes, stop talking about your damn meat!”
His cute face lights up on a huge laugh. As an afterthought he glances to me like he forgot I was here. “You having fun, Addison?”
“Madison.”
“Oh, right, sorry!”
“I’m having a great time, thank you.”
He returns to Denise, his friendly smile flashing the instant they lock eyes. “Well, I’ve gotta float around or people will think I don’t love them anymore. Looking good,
