I stepped up to the front of the crumbling brick. I wouldn’t go inside, that was wrong, but being this close, there should be someone who I could connect with.
My body temperature dropped further. I reached for the brick stoop to steady myself. I opened my eyes and saw her standing not more than ten feet from me.
An iridescent woman, not much older in looks than me.
I really focused on her. Her long skirt, hanging almost to her ankles. Her sweater, covering a crisp blouse. For the first time, I didn’t run, I didn’t tell her to go away, I allowed my pulse to level out and took steady breaths.
“Hi.” I whispered.
“You’ve grown.”
The girl’s words shot through me like an electrical current. I leaned my full weight onto the stoop, thankful the structure could still hold me.
“Yeah, I guess.” I tried hard to form words, but the intensity of the energy around me made it almost impossible.
The ghost girl smiled.
“Give me just a second, I’m trying.” I tried to keep from passing out. Struggling to keep my mind from filling with blackness.
“All I have is time.”
The darkness enveloped me. I woke, slumped on the steps a few minutes later. The girl was gone, and I was freezing.
The evening had darkened, and I needed to get home. As I walked, I contemplated all that I’d learned.
They could talk to me. They were conversational.
It was not just the noise from my childhood, not just the buzz and gibberish I had always blocked out.
They could understand me. Well, at least that one could.
Also, that one knew me. “You have grown” meant she had seen me before.
The next day I spent with family, helping as much as I could in the kitchen. That evening we played cards, which we’d done after Thanksgiving dinner for as long as I could remember.
The night ticked on, and before I knew it, another day had drawn to a close.
I surfed my phone for a while after my grandparents had turned in, just vegging a bit.
“Happy Thanksgiving.” a text notification popped up.
Tyler.
He sent me a text. This was at least something.
I started typing, and erased it, then simply typed, “Happy Thanksgiving to you, too.” I hit send as fast as I could. No reason to add to it. Keep it simple. I told him he could take all the time he needed.
I watched the screen, and nothing came back.
But that was ok, because at least I had something.
The next afternoon, I took another walk. I had to try again. For some reason, this place felt like the place I should be learning how to do this. Probably because it was home. Probably because I had spent years shoving it away, if I was going to explore this ‘thing’ I also needed to explore here.
My feet carried me to the same place as before, only this time, I positioned myself on the stoop, anticipating the cold and the blackout before it came. I took calming breaths, reminding myself that even if I did pass out, I would wake up in just a few minutes. There was nothing to be afraid of. Nothing could get me.
I relaxed my feet, and felt grounded, like a tree with roots. Another first. I forced my mind to visualize a tree, pushing roots deeper into the ground, anchoring me.
“You came back.”
The words shocked me because I hadn’t felt her coming. I’d focused so intensely on becoming a tree, I hadn’t felt the chills.
“I did.”
“You look better.” The girl stayed at least ten feet away, but I still felt no blackout coming on.
“Yeah, I don’t usually do very well around-your type.”
“I saw that.”
“I’m trying.”
“Take your time.”
I drew a deep breath. The air felt extremely cold filling my lungs, but I’d held onto my cognitive abilities this time. “I’m trying to figure out what I’m supposed to do.”
“I don’t think I can help you.”
“I just don’t know why I can see you.”
The girl tipped her head slightly. “Why do you think?”
“Because I’m a freak.”
Her head tilted the other way, “Do you really think that?”
I shook my head. “No, I just don’t know what to do. I don’t understand it. This is something that goes way beyond the basics in psychology.”
“So, why do you think you can see us?”
“I don’t have any idea. That’s what I’m trying to figure out.” How odd, having a normal conversation with a ghost.
“Do you have a message for me? Like something you’re supposed to tell me?”
“No.” She adjusted her sweater. As if the sweater was real. To her, it likely was.
“I don’t have any idea.” I stood and took a step.
The energy rippled through me hard and fast. My knees buckled and I fell to the ground.
I woke up again freezing, and alone.
Quickly, I walked back home.
This, by far, had been my most productive experiment. But why had the shock waited so long to take me down?
Was it really energy? If so, then what had changed this time versus last?
The tree thing.
I’d relaxed my feet and pretended I was a tree. The moment I moved; my body became a conduit again. It was as if my feet and their pretend roots had secured me to the ground, channeling the energy into the earth, instead of into my body.
Lightening rod.
That little science lesson from elementary school began to creep back into my mind. The kite, the key, the pole on the ground, the grounding rod in the ground, with the wire attached to the top of a building. Yes, that was it.
Unintentionally, I allowed the energy that
