The irony didn’t escape Livy. After finally getting the other’s permission to tell Ben about the Society, the truth no longer mattered. The years with him flipped like pages through Livy’s mind: their friendship that had transformed into passion, their affection that had deepened into love. She’d been convinced that there would be a storybook ending for them, yet the pages of their future were…empty.
If you turn down my offer, I will not ask again.
“It’s over,” Livy said numbly. “You were right. I told Hadleigh, and he…he...”
The pain and grief came in a rush. Suddenly, she was sobbing.
“Oh, my dear. I am sorry,” Charlie said.
Charlie put an arm around her, and Livy wept for everything that had been and would never be. For herself and Ben. For the discovery that, no matter how hard one strived, some dreams could not be spun, nor some battles won.
36
After Livy’s departure, Ben was ill again, his body purging the remnants of the drug. He didn’t know which was more ragged: his emotions or his physical state.
Livy had broken things off with him. Left him.
After everything they’d shared, she was gone.
He sat at the table, his head in his hands. He speared his fingers through his hair, the small pain a welcome distraction from the aching hollow inside him. He felt…gutted.
How could Livy deceive me? His fury had slowly faded and in its place was something far worse. A feeling he was more than familiar with, but one he’d never thought to see in Livy’s eyes: resignation. The death of hope.
A knock sounded, and he dragged himself over to open the door.
It was Chen, looking crisp and dapper in a blue suit.
“I thought you could use a bath,” he said.
Servants carrying a tub and buckets of steaming water followed the healer into the room. After they set everything up behind a bathing screen, Ben gave himself a much-needed wash. It felt good, scrubbing away the accumulated grime. He felt nearly human again when he emerged, washed and dressed in a new set of clothes.
Chen waved him over to the table and felt his pulse.
“Better,” Chen said with a nod. “I still feel disturbance in the flow of your qi, however. You are blocked in some way, my friend.”
“I feel like shite,” Ben said grimly.
“After being drugged and nearly drowning, it is to be expected.”
Ben’s chest tightened. “Not only because of that.”
“Ah.” Chen poured tea into cups, his movements precise. “I saw Lady Olivia when she left. She did not appear herself.”
“How did she appear?” Ben couldn’t help but ask.
“I do not claim to be an expert when it comes to the emotional state of young ladies, but if I had to guess…” The healer sampled his tea. “Heartbroken.”
The reply twisted a knife in Ben’s gut. He hated the idea of Livy hurting…which frustrated him even more. After all, she was the cause of her own pain, not to mention his.
“It is her own bloody fault. She lied to me, Chen,” he said bitterly. “After my marriage, you know how I value honesty. Livy promised to be truthful and obedient, and she’s been neither. She’s been keeping secrets from me this entire time.”
“I hope I do not regret asking.” Chen sighed. “What sort of secrets?”
As Ben told his friend about the Society of Angels and Livy’s shenanigans, his righteous indignation grew. How dare she take such risks, put herself in danger? Did she have no bloody sense at all? Obviously, he’d had no choice but to put his foot down.
“Can you believe Livy was doing all of that and behind my damned back?” he concluded.
Chen’s mouth gave an odd twitch. “It does explain her proficiency with daggers.”
“That is not amusing,” Ben said, scowling.
“Not at all.”
Ben clenched his jaw. “And she had the nerve to accuse me of limiting her freedom. She is a gently bred young lady—a duke’s daughter, for God’s sake! She knows full well her behavior is beyond the pale. Was I supposed to just stand there and allow my future bride to run around pell-mell, courting disaster at every turn?”
“To be fair, Lady Olivia seems quite capable of taking care of herself.” Chen cleared his throat. “And, if anything, she prevented a disaster last night. She saved your life, and from what she told me of her group’s undertaking, they have discovered some critical facts concerning the true identity of the villain behind the Devil’s Bliss. ‘Master Fong’ was a subterfuge.” The healer paused, muttering, “Why am I not surprised that it is an Englishman spreading the opium?”
“You are taking her side?” Ben asked in disbelief.
“I do not see sides in this situation. Merely perspectives.”
God save him from Chen’s philosophizing.
“From my perspective then, Livy betrayed my trust,” Ben said savagely. “I told her from the start that I would not tolerate a relationship built on lies. Indeed, that was why I hesitated to start things with her; in my gut, I knew she was not a biddable sort, yet I let her convince me otherwise. Which makes me the biggest fool alive.”
“Perhaps. Or perhaps your gut knows something that your brain does not,” Chen said.
“Hell’s teeth, stop talking in riddles.”
“Love is a riddle, but I shall do my best to lay it out clearly. I believe that you fell in love with Lady Olivia not in spite of who she is but because of it. You have known her from the time she was twelve years old; I have known her for less than a fortnight. If I am not surprised that she is a spirited and independent female, how can you be?”
Flummoxed, Ben thought it over. “I suppose…well, I am not surprised, exactly. Even so, she should not have lied to me.”
“Why do you think she did?”
Ben’s first instinct was to say that Livy wanted to twist him around her little finger and manipulate him…but the explanation struck him as false. He’d known her too long and that
