“Hey Beau?”
“Yeah?”
“How come you’re single?” I looked up at her slack-jawed, spit coated my windpipe and I started hacking up a lung. Cassidy tried to pat my back and then rub it.
“I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have… It’s none of my business. Just… just forget I asked, okay?”
“Cassidy Mae, you can ask me whatever you want. I’m an open book. Just wasn’t expectin’ you to ask me that. To answer your question… I guess I was just waitin’ for her to come home to me. The right woman. The other part of my soul…”
“Wait, you know who she is already? Beau Montgomery, you got your eye on a special lady in town?”
“No…” I let out a sigh. I thought we’d been over this already. I thought she’d gotten all the little hints I’d thrown her way. Clearly, I wasn’t working hard enough to get her attention.
“Well…”
I frowned over at her. “You know, Cass. You have to. And if you don’t, I’ve been failing miserably at making her feel like she’s the most special person in my life right now.”
I saw the lightbulb go off in her brain, “Beau…” Turning away from me, she started to get up when my hand fell on her arm. For the first time since she came to the farm, she barely flinched and then those emerald green eyes gazed up at me under dark black lashes.
“Listen, Cass. This is a hell of a time to tell you all this stuff. But as far as I can tell we got a long way to go and you need to know. I’m not letting you go again. I want you to be my girl, Cassidy Mae.” I exhale with a heavy whoosh. “I’ve been waiting years, biding my time. Hoping that one day fate would see fit to let me fix my wrongs by not tellin’ ya how I felt way back then. Well, I don’t know if it was fate that brought you back to me, but I’m mighty thankful for a do-over.”
She sighed as I waited for her rejection. “I know this isn’t what you want to hear Beau, but right now I’m trying to find me. I got so lost being with Andrew that I can’t even remember what I used to do when I was alone. I let myself get wrapped up in someone else and right now I just need simple. And I’m still technically married until all that gets worked out… My husband is dead and I don’t know what’s going on with that. If something happened between us Beau, and something happened to you because of what I’d seen, I wouldn’t ever forgive myself.”
“Tell me you don’t feel something between us, Cassidy Mae? Tell me that you don’t see it too.”
“If I said I didn’t feel it, I’d be lying and I respect you too much to lie to you. But there’s a lot of things that aren’t in my control right now. Hell, maybe the only thing you’re feeling right now is protective and misguided by the fact that I’m your sister’s childhood best friend.”
“You got everything out ya wanna say?” Her claim was absurd. I feel one hundred percent nothing familial towards her. Of that I was positive. As I watched her bite her lower lip and nod, I continued.
“Cass, I’m a grown man. I can take care of myself and you. The only thing holding me back from being with you is you. If you want to be with me. Then be with me. But I understand that going through what ya been through takes time. Hell, you’re brave for being bold enough to ask for a way out. I get it if you ain’t ready yet. I’ve been waiting years, a little while longer won’t kill me. Just give me a killer case of blue balls.”
“Beau Montgomery!” She screeched, covering her face as her tiny frame shook with giggles.
“What? It’s true. You’re the prettiest thing in the whole world darlin’. Can’t imagine a man not having a hard-on for you. And just so we’re clear, if that wasn’t, I don’t feel once ounce of familial feelings towards you. This is all straight-up lust and love, sweetheart. I sure as hell ain’t going anywhere unless you’re with me.”
Her mouth started to open and then closed again. It was as if she wanted to say something, but couldn’t decide on the right words. Not wanting any part of her discomfort, I figured a change of topic would be welcome.
“On that note… let’s get back to the horses. I gotta get back and finish up some other stuff before I call it a day.”
Spending the afternoon with Beau had been exactly what I needed. Feeling at peace with my decision to come home. Feeling safe staying here at the stables. I believed Beau when he said he’d protect me. He also scared the crap out of me when he made his little confessional about me being the one. It was endearing. The look on his face said he’d been telling the truth. This man had been nothing but honest and patient with me since I came home.
Truth is, I was starting to fall hard for him. And this time it wasn’t a high school crush. This time, things were different. He was a real loving family man. I wasn’t used to his breed.
Beau was a self-sufficient, content stable owner with no cares in the world except for the ones I’d brought to his very home. My life was the stone that never quite made it to the diamond phase. I wanted so badly to grab for that diamond. I knew Beau would give me what I needed.
But right now, I just didn’t see it as an option. There were too many what-ifs to think about. I hadn’t heard from anyone since the night
