I fix myself some coffee and some oatmeal, then sit down at the booth and listen to my music. I have my iPod plugged into some mini speakers. I don’t know how long their interview is but I hope I get an hour or so to myself. After finishing my breakfast I take my meds, this is something none of the band members know about. I know the manager does because Chris told him incase something happened and I would have to go to a doctor, but he asked him to keep it to himself, it is not something I share with everyone. I fix another cup of coffee and settle back into the booth while Jason Aldean sings about a big green tractor. I lay my head against the wall and just sit there peacefully, this is heaven to me.
I pick up the note from Justin, I run it through my fingers a few times. Do I even want to read it? I don’t want to start anything between us, good or bad. I want to be nothing, just someone in the background, this is the only way I can survive. I can’t let myself get friendly with him, and I can’t let myself hate him either. I have to spend six months traveling the world with this man, I don’t need him causing me trouble. I open his note and start reading it.
Flower,
I’m sorry about last night. I never meant to upset you. I was just asking questions so that I can get to know you better. The way you and Chris live is so strange to me, but in a good way. I was raised with a mom and a dad and two brothers. So to meet someone who has a brother and no one else it amazes me. I have cousins, aunts and uncles, and tons of people that would let me crash with them if I needed too. You said you didn’t have anyone but Chris, I guess I just wanted to know why. I am truly sorry if I hurt your feelings, I never meant too. I hope you will still let me listen to music with you one day.
Justin
I have now read the note three times and I still can’t figure this guy out. I’m still staring at the note when Chris walks onto the bus. I guess he could see I’m lost in space thinking because when I finally look up at him he looks worried.
“Don’t give me that face Christopher Jacob Marshall!” I snap at him. I’m not angry I’m just annoyed.
“What is wrong with you? Did Justin’s note upset you? What did it say?” He tries to take it out of my hand and I snarl at him.
“I’m not upset, I’m just annoyed, and the note is none of your business.” I get up and head to my bunk, I know he is following me but right now I don’t care.
“What is going on? I want an answer right now! Did he say something last night at the party? Come on you have to tell me something!” He has pulled me into a hug and is holding me tight. I want to start crying but I know that is a bad idea.
“Look it’s nothing really, I think I may have took some of the things he said last night the wrong way, but I don’t know. Just sit down and I’ll tell you okay?” We go to the back of the bus were there is a wrap around couch against the wall, and a small table in the middle of the space. This room is mostly used for meetings. “You have to promise me you will not get mad over anything I tell you, or I’m not telling you.” I stare at him and he nods so I continue. “At the party Justin came and asked me why I wasn’t over with everyone else, I tried to be nice but you know that is hard for me. We talked for a few minutes and he asked if he could listen to music with me, you came over a minute later and saved me. He is the type of guy that worries me. But last night after you went to sleep, I was reading when the others got on the bus and went to bed, well all but Justin. He knocked at my bunk and asked if I liked my Kindle, it was his idea to get me a gift to make me feel welcomed, his mom picked it out.” I smile at the thought then shake my head and go on. “Then he said he was going to watch TV up front and I could join him if I wanted too. I know I shouldn’t have but I did, it was nice at first but then he started asking questions. He asked if we had a home, weird I know. I told him about the house in Sacramento, hoping that would be the end of it, nope. He asked why I went on tour with you, didn’t I have friends or family I could stay with or something. I snapped at him telling him he was stuck with me because you’re my only family. I’m sorry Chris, I really am.” I started crying, and couldn’t stop. Chris just puts his arm around me.
“It’s okay, you didn’t say anything that I wouldn’t have. I’m guessing your tone of voice was a little harsh if I know my baby sister.” He laughs “But what did he say in the note? Was it good or bad?”
“Good I guess, he said he was sorry about upsetting me. He just wanted to get to know me, and had never meet anyone like us I guess. He talked about his family and stuff. Oh here just read it.” I hand him the note and wipe away my tears with the bottom of my shirt. I watch him as he reads
