“I love her.” I say quietly and Shay rubs my arm.
“I know.”
I hear hurried footsteps and then see a flustered Carmelo barge into the room.
“Where is she?” He’s panting and he has this wild look in his eye. “No one told me.”
“Bro,” I motion to the seat beside me, “come sit. She’s out of surgery and her parents are with her.”
I watch as he nearly collapses with relief and slowly comes to the seat I pointed out.
“I thought… it was like last time…” he looks at me with sadness. “You know.”
“Yeah man, I know.” I nod because I know exactly what he means. “I should’ve called you but I’ve been pretty fucking useless for the last few hours.”
He nods and we sit there in silence, waiting for answers. Right now, time is my worst fucking enemy.
“CHARLOTTE! PULL OVER!” I screech, my voice panicked. “Pull the fuck over!”
“Why did you let us become this?” She sounds sad, so fucking sad. “I’m so tired of pretending.”
“Charlotte,” I touch my fingers to her cheek, “stop the car.”
“I’m in a lot of trouble, Ivy.” She whispers as the tires screech on another sharp bend.
“What trouble? Tell me.”
“Mom is kicking me out for taking her pills. My school is kicking me out for selling them.” Her cheeks shine with all her tears, “I need the money.”
“I will give you money, you don’t need to do all of that, you know this.” I beg for her to see reason.
“I tried to get you out of my mind and I used him to do it.”
“Used who?” I ask, my stomach dropping with dread.
“You don’t know him, he’s goes to my school.” She whispers and wipes her nose on her sleeve. The car swerves with her motion and I scream until she rights it.
“Please Charlotte, please pull over.”
“I wanted us to raise it together, like a family.” She ends her words on a sob. “My family will never forgive me.”
“For what?”
“I got pregnant!” She screams and I startle at the sudden volume change.
“Oh no.” I breathe and she turns her head to look at me.
That was the wrong thing to say because she growls in frustration and clenches her fingers on the wheel.
“I love you!” She screams, “we could’ve raised this baby together.”
She’s pregnant and as terrible as that is, she’s also been heavily taking drugs. This Charlotte that’s in front of me isn’t the real version, the real one is sweet and level-headed, and she would’ve never gotten herself into this trouble. No, this is something wild Ivy Greene would be expected to do and I can’t help but think maybe it’s due to my influence over the years.
All of this is my fault and Charlotte is a by-product of my toxic personality.
“Okay,” I nod, “pull over, we’ll do it. We’ll raise this baby and live happily fucking ever after, okay Charlotte?”
“I don’t believe you, Ivy.” She sounds resigned, “if I can’t have you, no one can.”
Her face becomes still, not a trace of emotion etched into the features, and her body tightens. I look straight ahead and see a sign that states ‘dead end’, Charlotte doesn’t ease up on the gas. We fly down the small residential street and I know what’s going to happen.
I close my eyes and let myself drift out of my body, detached from everything. I think of my family and how much I love them, even though I don’t show it. I think of Charlotte and how much I’ve wronged her. And then I think of me and how little faith I put into myself. I accept everything and when it’s over, I can only hope I end up where Nana Jenna is.
The car jolts a bit as it hits a wooden barrier, but it does little to slow us down, and then it feels like we’re taking off on a runway. My eyes stay tightly shut as my stomach lifts to my throat and then we hit the ground, my body jarring with the impact.
I hear Charlotte mutter an ‘oh God,’ the car slams into an object, and then the sound of crunching metal, like what I heard at the Demolition Derby Dad took us to one year. My seatbelt locks and tightens across my chest, cutting into the skin. The airbag deploys and my face bounces off the material, like a hard smack. It’s hard to breathe, the pain slowly penetrates my insides, and my body begins to scream in protest.
The smell of burning metal and gasoline hits my nostril, the combined scents forcing my eyes open. Charlotte groans beside me and I turn my head-the pain slicing up my neck-to look at her. The first thing I see is her face against the deployed airbag and blood dripping off her chin. Her skin is completely covered in blood.
“Charlotte.” My voice breaks and my arm feels like lead as I reach for her.
She makes a weird noise every time she sucks in a breath and it’s short, the effort rattling in her chest.
“No.” I moan.
I can’t let her be the one to get in trouble for this, it’s all my fault, and the only reason we’ve ended up here is because of me. Everything is because of me. I click the button of her seatbelt and she slides forward, her body flush with the wheel. Then I release mine and I pull the lever to open my door. It takes a few small pushes but the door finally gives and swings open wide.
The car is on a steep slope and the drop off at the cliff is only about five feet ahead, the large tree saved us from certain death.
“Charlotte, wait.” I tell her and pull myself out of the car.
As soon as my feet hit the earth, my legs collapse under me, and my knees sink into the mud. Standing is too difficult as I
