“I have to go. I have to think, and I can’t do that here, with you.”
I made a move toward the door, when Dereck stepped in front of me. I looked at him questioningly, and he bit his lip in contemplation.
“Tell me when I can see you again,” he said, and I was almost convinced I heard a desperate pleading in his voice, but that couldn’t be right. Why would he be desperate to see me again? We barely knew each other.
I shook my head, not sure what to say. I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to continue my employment here. Surely I could find another job elsewhere. Start over.
“I have to go, Dereck.”
“Lily?”
I didn’t respond. I walked around him and out the door.
His assistant looked at me, her eyes widening in surprise, and I could feel myself blushing. Was his office even soundproof? I didn’t know.
Thankfully, she didn’t look at me with scorn or judgment, and aside from her initial surprise, she seemed genuinely concerned about me. And even though I didn’t know her, I felt uncomfortable that I might have disappointed this sweet lady, who was old enough to be my mom.
My lips trembled, and I looked away before I lost it right then and there.
I took the stairwell down to the first floor and left through the back door. I was lucky enough not to run into anyone. I called that my one and only blessing today.
3
Dereck
I went to the Blacklist after work because I didn’t know where else to go.
I could have used my position as the CEO and looked at Lily’s file. I would have gotten not only her phone number, but her home address as well.
Yet it didn’t feel right.
It felt like an invasion of privacy, probably because it was, and I didn’t want Lily to feel violated.
I went to Blacklist, hoping I would find her working there again, although I wasn’t sure why she had been working there to begin with. Jerimiah was not hurting for money. His net worth was probably as much as mine. Surely he could provide for Lily without making her work in one of his bars where any bastard could ogle her, or worse, grope her.
My fist tightened at the thought, and I had to remind myself that she wasn’t mine to protect.
Yet, whispered a small voice.
I shook my head.
Could I make Lily mine?
And if that did happen, what the hell was I supposed to do with a girl like her? Even at a glance, I knew she wasn’t like the girls I usually took home. Jerimiah was spot-on when he said Lily was different.
She was better.
She was so out of my league, it wasn’t even funny.
Nevertheless, she had let me touch her this morning. Not only that, she had let me make her come. And that had felt like nothing short of a blessing. That a girl like her would let a tarnished bastard like me touch her.
I shook away the thought and opened the door to the bar. It was busy for a Monday night, and a quick look around told me Lily wasn’t here.
My heart felt heavy with disappointment. What if she didn’t show tonight? Or worse, what if she’d decided to quit? It would be within her right, but I didn’t want her to disappear on me. I just found her…
I didn’t want to lose her before we even started, and the thought was so out of character for me, I didn’t know what to make of it.
What exactly was I hoping we would start?
I grabbed a seat at the bar and waited until the bartender finished taking another customer’s order before coming to me. If I couldn’t see Lily tonight, I would get blasted drunk, just so I wouldn’t have to think of her gray eyes.
I didn’t know why she affected me so much. What was it about this girl that got me all tied up in knots? I wasn’t a fifteen-year-old virgin anymore. I was my own man. I was in control of my own body and emotions… wasn’t I?
So why this girl?
Lily was beautiful, there was no doubt about it, but I was sure my fascination with her went beyond that. And I didn’t like who I had become under her gaze. Or perhaps, I liked it just a little too much.
That was a problem.
I let out a tired sigh and looked back at the bartender to see he was still in conversation with another patron. I really needed that drink. Something, anything, to get my mind off the one girl I shouldn’t be thinking about. Which was funny, considering I was at her brother’s place of business, with the hope of catching even a tiny glimpse of her.
Okay.
That was a lie.
A tiny glimpse wouldn’t be enough. I wanted to devour her whole.
A small shadow fell over me, and I looked up and met the emerald-green eyes of a beautiful woman with long brown hair falling straight down her back, a full sleeve of tattoos on each arm, and a small smile that looked more like a smirk.
She was wearing a tight black vest with no shirt underneath, leaving very little to the imagination. I didn’t blame her. If I had a body like that, I would be showing it off too. Yet this woman, who was the kind of woman I wouldn’t have minded taking home before, did nothing for me now. Lily had my dick wrapped around her little finger, and the little imp didn’t even know it. If she did, she wouldn’t have run away from me. She would have wielded her obvious power over me like the goddess that she was. I needed to be careful, because at the rate I was going, I would offer her the world if she only asked for it.
The female bartender leaned
