friend only thing with me, then I need to know now.”

“What makes you think we can’t?” Marcus asks, his dark brows furrowing.

I step up to the kitchen table and lean against it, putting a little more distance between me and the guys.

“Look, I don’t have a problem with sexual innuendos or a bit of harmless flirting, but I’m getting some…” Jesus, how do I say this? “Vibes, I guess. If I have overstepped by doing something misleading, I need you to tell me because I don’t want to give any of you the wrong impression.”

The boys are quiet for a few moments, and I’m sure I’ve fucked up. I’ve either hurt their feelings or made a fool of myself.

Jared breaks the silence. “I’m not gonna lie, Lex. If you came to any of us and asked us to be your guy, then we would without hesitation, but we know the deal here. We are here for you, with you, as friends, as family. We are also guys who think with our dicks way too much, and it’s hard to deny our attraction to you. So yeah, we flirt like the dicks we are. If you ask us to stop, we will. It will be a challenge, but we would do anything for you.” They all nod in agreement at Jared’s words, and I feel like crying again. I don’t though.

“We also know your heart belongs to someone else, Lex,” Marcus speaks this time, and I’m glad he added that bit in because it’s true. Ayden may not want me, understandably so, but my heart belongs to him, and until it doesn’t, then anyone taking his place is out of the question.

I nod, “Okay. Good.” And then I shake my head, “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. You can talk to us about anything.” Shaun, the playboy of the group, looks genuine and serious for a change.

“Anything?” I ask, shooting Shaun a cheeky grin.

“Yes, anything.” He smiles back.

“Oh good, because I’ve got mad cramps and need to go get some tampons.”

A round of curses spill from the boys, and Shaun sticks his fingers in his ears, cringing. And just like that, all is right in the world… for now.

CHAPTER SIX

I spend my Sunday afternoon at home alone. Marcus had to go home earlier since he hadn’t been there in three nights and the other boys followed not long after to make appearances with their parents too. Jared drew the short straw for babysitting duty tonight, even though I tried to tell the boys that they don’t have to keep doing this. They ignored me like my opinion is irrelevant. I hate putting people out, but I’m quietly thankful that they insist.

I do my usual run on the treadmill and kick the shit out of the boxing bag before Jared arrives back just before 6pm. He comes bearing steaming hot fries and fresh bread, so we have hot chip sandwiches for dinner and then do some homework at my kitchen table before retreating to the living room to watch TV.

“You remember those forts we used to build over near the hockey fields?” Jared asks, sitting next to me on the couch eating Salt n’ Vinegar chips from a bowl.

“Yep. We thought they were so sick.” I laugh, “They were so bad.”

Jared laughs too, “They never held when the wind picked up. Remember when it fell in on Marcus.”

“Oh my god, that was hilarious. He hated us for ages after that. Said we bullied him.” My tummy hurts from laughing, but it’s the good type of pain.

“He’s always been a wuss.” Jared chuckles and offers me the chips, but I shake my head, “Remember when we were in the fort, and my brother turned up with his girlfriend, and he didn’t know we were inside?”

“Oh yeah. That’s when we got our first closeup of teenage love.” I remember wishing I was the girl Jared’s brother, Tim, was kissing. I’ll keep that little memory to myself, though.

“I wouldn’t call it love. Lust definitely. I remember getting the biggest woodie watching them kiss.”

“Eww, Jared!” I whack him with a cushion, “TMI! I didn’t need to know that!”

He throws his head back in hysterics causing the bowl of chips to slip off his lap, but I leap over to save it just in time.

“It wasn’t just me, you know?” Jared continues through chuckles, “Marcus did too. Told me he nearly blew his load in his pants when my brother touched the girl's boob.”

“Eww! Stop Jared! I don’t want to hear this!” I stick my fingers in my ears and aggressively shake my head, effectively giving myself a mouthful of my wayward hair.

Moving to his knees before me, Jared grabs my wrists and pulls them away from my ears so I can’t block him out. “He also told me that day that when your boobs grow, he wanted to touch them.”

Lifting my knees to my chest, I push my legs back out and kick Jared off the couch. He falls to the floor, laughing and clutching his tummy as if the act causes him pain. I take the cushion and start beating him with it, making him squeal like a girl, or a pig, it’s hard to decide which one it sounds the closest to, and eventually, I fall in a heap beside him on the floor in my own fit of laughter. It feels good. Really good.

“I’ll kick you in the nuts if you ever repeat that story again.” I manage to say when I gain my control.

Jared chuckles, laying back on the floor, looking up at the ceiling before a sombre look washes over his face.

“My brother died a week later. Poor guy didn’t even get the chance to lose his virginity.”

I lay down next to Jared taking his hand in mine like I used to when we were kids. “He’d be proud of you, Jar. You’re a decent guy, and he’d be proud to call you his brother.”

Jared turns his head

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