The Taming of the Shrew

savours and I feel soft things:
Upon my life, I am a lord indeed
And not a tinker nor Christophero Sly.
Well, bring our lady hither to our sight;
And once again, a pot o’ the smallest ale. Second Servant

Will’t please your mightiness to wash your hands?
O, how we joy to see your wit restored!
O, that once more you knew but what you are!
These fifteen years you have been in a dream;
Or when you waked, so waked as if you slept.

Sly

These fifteen years! by my fay, a goodly nap.
But did I never speak of all that time?

First Servant

O, yes, my lord, but very idle words:
For though you lay here in this goodly chamber,
Yet would you say ye were beaten out of door;
And rail upon the hostess of the house;
And say you would present her at the leet,
Because she brought stone jugs and no seal’d quarts:
Sometimes you would call out for Cicely Hacket.

Sly Ay, the woman’s maid of the house. Third Servant

Why, sir, you know no house nor no such maid,
Nor no such men as you have reckon’d up,
As Stephen Sly and did John Naps of Greece
And Peter Turph and Henry Pimpernell
And twenty more such names and men as these
Which never were nor no man ever saw.

Sly Now Lord be thanked for my good amends! All Amen. Sly I thank thee: thou shalt not lose by it. Enter the Page as a lady, with attendants. Page How fares my noble lord? Sly

Marry, I fare well; for here is cheer enough.
Where is my wife?

Page Here, noble lord: what is thy will with her? Sly

Are you my wife and will not call me husband?
My men should call me “lord:” I am your goodman.

Page

My husband and my lord, my lord and husband;
I am your wife in all obedience.

Sly I know it well. What must I call her? Lord Madam. Sly Al’ce madam, or Joan madam? Lord “Madam,” and nothing else: so lords call ladies. Sly

Madam wife, they say that I have dream’d
And slept above some fifteen year or more.

Page

Ay, and the time seems thirty unto me,
Being all this time abandon’d from your bed.

Sly

’Tis much. Servants, leave me and her alone.
Madam, undress you and come now to bed.

Page

Thrice-noble lord, let me entreat of you
To pardon me yet for a night or two,
Or, if not so, until the sun be set:
For your physicians have expressly charged,
In peril to incur your former malady,
That I should yet absent me from your bed:
I hope this reason stands for my excuse.

Sly Ay, it stands so that I may hardly tarry so long. But I would be loath to fall into my dreams again: I will therefore tarry in despite of the flesh and the blood. Enter a Messenger. Messenger

Your honour’s players, heating your amendment,
Are come to play a pleasant comedy;
For so your doctors hold it very meet,
Seeing too much sadness hath congeal’d your blood,
And melancholy is the nurse of frenzy:
Therefore they thought it good you hear a play
And frame your mind to mirth and merriment,
Which bars a thousand harms and lengthens life.

Sly Marry, I will, let them play it. Is not a comonty a Christmas gambold or a tumbling-trick? Page No, my good lord; it is more pleasing stuff. Sly What, household stuff? Page It is a kind of history. Sly Well, we’ll see’t. Come, madam wife, sit by my side and let the world slip: we shall ne’er be younger. Flourish.

Act I

Scene I

Padua. A public place.

	Enter Lucentio and his man Tranio.
Lucentio	Tranio, since for the great desire I had To see fair Padua, nursery of arts, I am arrived for fruitful Lombardy, The pleasant garden of great Italy; And by my father’s love and leave am arm’d With his good will and thy good company, My trusty servant, well approved in all, Here let us breathe and haply institute A course of learning and ingenious studies. Pisa renown’d for grave citizens Gave me my being and my father first, A merchant of great traffic through the world, Vincentio, come of Bentivolii. Vincentio’s son brought up in Florence It shall become to serve all hopes conceived, To deck his fortune with his virtuous deeds: And therefore, Tranio, for the time I study, Virtue and that part of philosophy Will I apply that treats of happiness By virtue specially to be achieved. Tell me thy mind; for I have Pisa left And am to Padua come, as he that leaves A shallow plash to plunge him in the deep And with satiety seeks to quench his thirst.
Tranio	Mi perdonato, gentle master mine, I am in all affected as yourself; Glad that you thus continue your resolve To suck the sweets of sweet philosophy. Only, good master, while we do admire This virtue and this moral discipline, Let’s be no stoics nor no stocks, I pray; Or so devote to Aristotle’s checks As Ovid be an outcast quite abjured: Balk logic with acquaintance that you have And practise rhetoric in your common talk; Music and poesy use to quicken you; The mathematics and the metaphysics, Fall to them as you find your stomach serves you; No profit grows where is no pleasure ta’en: In brief, sir, study what you most affect.
Lucentio	Gramercies, Tranio, well dost thou advise. If, Biondello, thou wert come ashore, We could at once put us in readiness, And take a lodging fit to entertain Such friends as time in Padua shall beget. But stay a while: what company is this?
Tranio	Master, some show to welcome us to town.
	Enter Baptista, Katharina, Bianca, Gremio, and Hortensio. Lucentio and Tranio stand by.
Baptista	Gentlemen, importune me no farther, For how I firmly am resolved you know; That is, not bestow my youngest daughter Before I have a husband for the elder: If either of you both love Katharina, Because I know you well and love you well, Leave shall you have to court her at your pleasure.
Gremio	Aside. To cart her rather: she’s too rough for me. There, There, Hortensio, will you any wife?
Katharina	I pray you, sir, is it your will To make a stale of me amongst these mates?
Hortensio	Mates,