The Taming of the Shrew

maid! how mean you that? no mates for you,
Unless you were of gentler, milder mould. Katharina

I’ faith, sir, you shall never need to fear:
I wis it is not half way to her heart;
But if it were, doubt not her care should be
To comb your noddle with a three-legg’d stool
And paint your face and use you like a fool.

Hortensia From all such devils, good Lord deliver us! Gremio And me too, good Lord! Tranio

Hush, master! here’s some good pastime toward:
That wench is stark mad or wonderful froward.

Lucentio

But in the other’s silence do I see
Maid’s mild behaviour and sobriety.
Peace, Tranio!

Tranio Well said, master; mum! and gaze your fill. Baptista

Gentlemen, that I may soon make good
What I have said, Bianca, get you in:
And let it not displease thee, good Bianca,
For I will love thee ne’er the less, my girl.

Katharina

A pretty peat! it is best
Put finger in the eye, an she knew why.

Bianca

Sister, content you in my discontent.
Sir, to your pleasure humbly I subscribe:
My books and instruments shall be my company,
On them to took and practise by myself.

Lucentio Hark, Tranio! thou may’st hear Minerva speak. Hortensio

Signior Baptista, will you be so strange?
Sorry am I that our good will effects
Bianca’s grief.

Gremio

Why will you mew her up,
Signior Baptista, for this fiend of hell,
And make her bear the penance of her tongue?

Baptista

Gentlemen, content ye; I am resolved:
Go in, Bianca: Exit Bianca.
And for I know she taketh most delight
In music, instruments and poetry,
Schoolmasters will I keep within my house,
Fit to instruct her youth. If you, Hortensio,
Or Signior Gremio, you, know any such,
Prefer them hither; for to cunning men
I will be very kind, and liberal
To mine own children in good bringing up:
And so farewell. Katharina, you may stay;
For I have more to commune with Bianca. Exit.

Katharina Why, and I trust I may go too, may I not? What, shall I be appointed hours; as though, belike, I knew not what to take, and what to leave, ha? Exit. Gremio You may go to the devil’s dam: your gifts are so good, here’s none will hold you. Their love is not so great, Hortensio, but we may blow our nails together, and fast it fairly out: our cake’s dough on both sides. Farewell: yet, for the love I bear my sweet Bianca, if I can by any means light on a fit man to teach her that wherein she delights, I will wish him to her father. Hortensio So will I, Signior Gremio: but a word, I pray. Though the nature of our quarrel yet never brooked parle, know now, upon advice, it toucheth us both, that we may yet again have access to our fair mistress and be happy rivals in Bianco’s love, to labour and effect one thing specially. Gremio What’s that, I pray? Hortensio Marry, sir, to get a husband for her sister. Gremio A husband! a devil. Hortensio I say, a husband. Gremio I say, a devil. Thinkest thou, Hortensio, though her father be very rich, any man is so very a fool to be married to hell? Hortensio Tush, Gremio, though it pass your patience and mine to endure her loud alarums, why, man, there be good fellows in the world, an a man could light on them, would take her with all faults, and money enough. Gremio I cannot tell; but I had as lief take her dowry with this condition, to be whipped at the high cross every morning. Hortensio Faith, as you say, there’s small choice in rotten apples. But come; since this bar in law makes us friends, it shall be so far forth friendly maintained all by helping Baptista’s eldest daughter to a husband we set his youngest free for a husband, and then have to’t afresh. Sweet Bianca! Happy man be his dole! He that runs fastest gets the ring. How say you, Signior Gremio? Gremio I am agreed; and would I had given him the best horse in Padua to begin his wooing that would thoroughly woo her, wed her and bed her and rid the house of her! Come on. Exeunt Gremio and Hortensio. Tranio

I pray, sir, tell me, is it possible
That love should of a sudden take such hold?

Lucentio

O Tranio, till I found it to be true,
I never thought it possible or likely;
But see, while idly I stood looking on,
I found the effect of love in idleness:
And now in plainness do confess to thee,
That art to me as secret and as dear
As Anna to the queen of Carthage was,
Tranio, I burn, I pine, I perish, Tranio,
If I achieve not this young modest girl.
Counsel me, Tranio, for I know thou canst;
Assist me, Tranio, for I know thou wilt.

Tranio

Master, it is no time to chide you now;
Affection is not rated from the heart:
If love have touch’d you, nought remains but so,
“Redime te captum quam queas minimo.”

Lucentio

Gramercies, lad, go forward; this contents:
The rest will comfort, for thy counsel’s sound.

Tranio

Master, you look’d so longly on the maid,
Perhaps you mark’d not what’s the pith of all.

Lucentio

O yes, I saw sweet beauty in her face,
Such as the daughter of Agenor had,
That made great Jove to humble him to her hand,
When with his knees he kiss’d the Cretan strand.

Tranio

Saw you no more? mark’d you not how her sister
Began to scold and raise up such a storm
That mortal ears might hardly endure the din?

Lucentio

Tranio, I saw her coral lips to move
And with her breath she did perfume the air:
Sacred and sweet was all I saw in her.

Tranio

Nay, then, ’tis time to stir him from his trance.
I pray, awake, sir: if you love the maid,
Bend thoughts and wits to achieve her. Thus it stands:
Her eldest sister is so curst and shrewd
That till the father rid his hands of her,
Master, your love must live a maid at home;
And therefore has he closely mew’d her up,
Because she will not be annoy’d with suitors.

Lucentio

Ah, Tranio, what a cruel