I can hear her trying to get herself back under control as I do the same. Our breaths come in a matching set of raspy pants. The air I suck in smells of sex, of her. It’s intoxicating. I want to be able to smell her scent beside me every night for the rest of my life. I never want to let her go again. I won’t let her go. I can’t.
Her fingers edge closer to mine across the mattress, and I feel them against my own. I turn my hand and she slips hers into it. I hold her hand, palm to palm, and even that, the most innocence of contact makes me want her again.
When I can breathe normally again, and my muscles no longer feel like liquid, I roll onto my side and prop myself up on one elbow.
Callie turns to face me and she smiles at me.
Now, I feel like my heart will explode.
I reach out and put my palm flat on her hip and she moves closer. Her eyes are starting to close and I run my fingers gently up and down her side.
“I’m so sorry Matt,” Callie mumbles, almost asleep.
“What for?” I ask her. What could she possibly be sorry for after what we’ve just done?
“I think I spilled champagne on your carpet,” she says with a sleepy smile.
I laugh. “I can live with that. You can spill anything you want to if you do that afterwards.”
She laughs softly. I move my hand, shifting slightly and putting my head on the pillow beside hers. She smiles again and I kiss her forehead. She wraps her arm around my waist and when her eyes slip closed again, they don’t open. I wrap my arm around her, holding her against me, loving the heavy feeling of her arm draped across me.
I watch her sleeping, her face relaxed, her mouth open a little bit. She’s so fucking beautiful. I want to kiss her back awake, make love to her again, but I don’t, because I know if I wake her, I’ll have to ask the question that’s burning inside of me. The one I’m afraid of the answer to.
Was tonight just because she got caught up in the moment, or does it mean she’s forgiven me?
Of course, I’ll have to get the answer to that question at some point, but not right now.
Right now, I just want to cling to the hope inside of me and the beautiful woman beside me, and not think about anything except the way Callie feels in my arms.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Callie
I wake up and stretch, wincing slightly as my back cracks. I sit up and wince again as my tender pussy presses against the mattress. I shift positions, smiling to myself as I remember last night. Matts’ face was a picture when he came out onto the balcony and found me waiting for him with my dress around my hips and my panties gone.
The memory makes my clit tingle, and I turn my head, looking beside me for Matt, but he’s not there. I check the time. It’s only eight thirty so it’s not like I’ve massively overslept. Matt must have woken early and not wanted to disturb me. He could have. There are certain ways he could have woken me that I would have been more than happy about.
I promised myself I wasn’t going to have sex with him until I was certain he was the same man he had always been, but apparently, I have no will power. Well no, actually that’s not it. I guess I just decided that if I was going to give Matt a second chance, and we were actually going to stand a chance of making it work, then we had to do the things we had always done. And if I’m being totally honest, I just can’t help myself. He turns me on so much, and the thought of being around him, but not letting him hold me or kiss me or fuck me is too much. I know I said I wanted to take things slowly, but let's be honest here. We’re already way past that point.
I’m still not really sure about this whole thing. I mean don’t get me wrong, I think I can get past what’s happened, especially now I know my promotion was nothing to do with Matt. That bothered me more than him hiding his identity from me. It felt too close to whoring myself out.
Last night, Matt was sweet and attentive, which in fairness… he always has been. And I know he’s making a real effort to open up to me. He told me several personal stories last night. I guess my issue isn’t with him, it’s with me. I worry that we’re just too different. Not as people, as people, we’re pretty similar. But our life experiences are worlds apart, and I don’t know if we can get past that.
I don’t see myself ever fitting into Matt’s world. And right now, he might like the idea of being with a bit of rough, but for how long? But what about his family? It’s one thing for him to say they’re down to earth and all that, but how are they going to react when they find out he’s seeing Jane Nobody? Will they think I’m just some opportunistic little gold digger, or will they humor me, let Matt have his Cinderella moment and then move on with his life?
I sigh and stand up. I told him I was willing to give us a chance, and I meant it. I have to put these thoughts to one side, take it one day at a time, and just see how it goes. It’s hard though.
