Hardly were all these preparations completed when the Buick bore down upon them and drew up just behind the Rolls-Royce.
General Murgatroyd was the first to get out and walked briskly up to where the guilty ones were waiting by the roadside. He looked hot and cross, his hands were covered with oil.
‘How’s this?’ he said in a loud angry voice. ‘We thought at least you’d have the lunch all ready for us by now. We’ve had a beastly time with a slipping clutch. Got it put right now but it’s been the hell of a journey, I can tell you, and, personally, I’m ready for my food. Come on, let’s get it out.’
There was a gloomy silence. At last Walter, prodded from behind by Sally, cleared his throat and said:
‘I’m afraid, sir, that a rather – er – disappointing thing has happened to the lunch. Albert found that there wasn’t quite enough room for his legs with the basket on the floor of the car, so we stopped and put it on to the carrier. When we arrived here we found to our dismay that it had disappeared – it must have dropped off as we drove along. We hoped that you might perhaps have come across it and picked it up. No such luck, I suppose?’
‘This is damned annoying,’ said the general violently. ‘Who strapped it on to the carrier?’
‘Albert and I did, sir.’
‘Then you must have done it damned inefficiently, that’s all I can say.’
He glared at Albert.
The admiral here came forward and said, not unkindly:
‘Well, it can’t be helped now. Let’s have a drink while we’re waiting.’
‘Unfortunately, sir, the bottles seem to have been forgotten. I thought when I woke up this morning that Friday the thirteenth is seldom a lucky day.’
‘It happens to be Friday the twelfth today, though,’ said Lady Prague.
The admiral at first appeared stunned by this piece of news, but, suddenly galvanized into life, he cried:
‘Forgotten! What do you mean? I saw them into the car myself. I always see to the drinks.’
‘Yes, he does: I can vouch for that.’ The general looked again at Albert as he spoke.
Nobody answered.
‘This is all most peculiar and extremely annoying,’ said Lady Prague. ‘What makes it worse is that the picnic basket with fittings was Prague’s silver-wedding present from the tenants – with his first wife, of course. We shall certainly have to inform the police of this loss. Meanwhile, what shall we do for luncheon?’
‘If I might make a suggestion, Lady Prague,’ ventured Mr Buggins timidly, ‘perhaps you had better go to the Auld Lang Syne at Invertochie and have your luncheon there?’
‘And what about all of you? Aren’t you hungry?’
‘Yes, indeed, we are starving – starving. I meant, of course, for all of us to go, but thought that if only a few can get in, owing to the large crowd which is always attracted there by the games, that you should in justice come before us, as it was partly owing to our carelessness that the basket was lost.’
‘Oh, I see; yes. Well, there’s no point in waiting here, we might as well push on to the Auld Lang Syne. Most inconvenient and tiresome.’
They all climbed back into the cars and when they were once more under way Albert said:
‘Really, Walter, you are a sneak. Why did you say it was my legs that hadn’t enough room: surely you could have chosen someone else. I’m in such disfavour with the general and I feel now that he will never look on me kindly again.’
‘I’m sorry; I couldn’t think of anyone else.’
‘Well, there was yourself.’
‘I never think of myself.’
‘I suppose you all realize,’ said Jane, who was tightly holding Albert’s hand under the rug, ‘that we are fated to eat another enormous lunch. Personally, I couldn’t face a small biscuit at the moment.’
They gazed at each other in horror at this prospect, but Mr Buggins assured them that there was no need for anxiety as the hotel was certain to be full on that particular day.
‘I am even rather perturbed,’ he added, ‘as to whether those poor hungry things will get a bite or sup.’
‘I’m quite sure that Lady Prague will get a bite, and don’t doubt that the admiral will somehow find a sup,’ said Albert; ‘but think how awful it would be if there did happen to be enough for all of us. Hadn’t we better pretend to have a breakdown and let the others go on?’
‘You forget it’s the general behind us, who obviously knows all about cranking plugs and things: he’d see in a moment that nothing was wrong. No, we shall have to risk it.’
When they arrived at the Auld Lang Syne it presented, to their dismay, a singularly empty and welcoming appearance.
‘Lunch for ten? Certainly. This way, please.’
The waiter led them through a stuffy little hall bedecked with stags’ heads, up some brown linoleum stairs to the dining-room which, though empty, smelt strongly of humanity.
‘No, sir; no crowd now. There has been, sir; oh, yes, but they’re all to the games. Will you start with fish or soup, sir?’
At this moment the rest of the party appeared, headed by Lady Prague, who said:
‘As we are in such a hurry I will order for everybody,’ and took the menu card from the waiter.
‘Tomato soup, roast mutton, two vegetables, rice pudding and prunes, Cheddar cheese, celery and biscuits. That will do nicely. I shall drink ginger beer. What about everybody else?’
‘Whisky,’ said the admiral, quickly. ‘I wish I could understand what happened to those bottles.’
He looked suspiciously at Albert.
Very soon the tomato soup arrived. It tasted strongly and unnaturally of tomatoes, was hot, thick and particularly filling. Lady Prague fell upon it with relish and crumbled bread into it.
Albert, Jane, Walter, Sally and Mr Buggins never forgot that lunch.
