I felt my mouth open, but no words came out. I had braced myself for Ava speaking to me in another way, a way that I didn’t have words to describe but which made my tummy feel funny and jiggly. Ava had a broad smile on her face that stretched from ear to ear. I wondered if she had been drinking sherry with her breakfast.
‘Run along and get your costume then. They’ll all be waiting for you.’ Ava gave two small claps with her hands, and I turned on my heel and rushed back to the cottage where I squeezed into my costume, which was getting a little tight for me now.
I put my goggles on my forehead and wrapped my towel around me, under my arms. I slipped my feet into my flip-flops and trundled back off to the main house. When I got to the courtyard, I carried on past the back door, along the small path that led to a gate, which would take me into the main garden and then round to the pool. I could already hear whoops of laughter and shouting as I emerged through the gate, and I felt a fizzing in my stomach, a mixture of nerves and excitement.
The path continued on to the pool at the very end of the lawn, but to my left was the beautifully pruned lawn that the family played croquet on, an activity I had often thought was silly. Yet today the lawn was full of adults and children alike, all fully clothed, with croquet sticks in their hands, whooping and laughing and having what appeared to be the time of their lives. I saw Caitlin at the far end of the grass, still dressed in tennis gear, a croquet stick in hand. She took one look at me and one hand went to her mouth as she stifled a laugh. After a moment or two, which felt like an excruciating hour, everyone went back to their games and I could see Chuck jogging over to me.
‘Hey, Sasha, how’s it going? You look like you’re all set for a swim.’
I looked down at my feet, shame swept over me.
‘Sasha, look at you, keen as mustard.’ I looked to my right; Ava had just emerged from the patio doors a little further along. ‘Everyone’s enjoying a jolly good game of croquet. Swimming is this afternoon now,’ Ava said.
‘It is rather hot already, Ava.’ Chuck looked towards the pool at the end of the garden. ‘I’ve been eyeing up that water since we finished tennis over an hour ago.’
‘Well, swimming is after luncheon. Now come on, Chuck, show me your croquet skills it’s been too lo…’
Ava’s voice faded to nothing as we both watched as Chuck pulled off his T-shirt, kicked off his shoes and to the horror of Ava and further embarrassment to me, he pulled his shorts down, to reveal a pair of bright red Y-fronts. Blood rushed to my cheeks. I heard a few audible gasps as Chuck began walking towards the pool. I looked around at the shocked faces of others. As he got closer, he sped up until he was running and then took a jump and cannonballed into the pool. Water cascaded over the edge and onto the hot, dry concrete slabs.
Once he had come to the surface again, he pulled his body up against the side of the pool. ‘Come on, Sasha, what are you waiting for? You didn’t put that costume on for nothing, did you?’
Ava’s face was now a contorted mess of emotions. I took one final glance at her before walking slowly towards the pool. I could feel the eyes of everyone on me, especially Ava’s. I was sure I would be in huge trouble, but something about Chuck’s boldness spurred me on. At the edge of the pool, I dropped my towel and pulled my goggles over my eyes. I felt conscious of my costume for a second and then Chuck was pulling me by my leg. I let my body slip down into the cool pool and I began treading water. As soon as I was in, Chuck was off swimming a length front crawl. As I began to swim towards Chuck, I looked up to see others pulling off layers and dropping like bombs into the pool around me. A boy and a girl who looked around my brother’s age were swimming ahead of me, whooping and splashing each other, and even two of the adults had slid in partially clothed.
I hadn’t seen Caitlin make an appearance yet, but as I reached the end of the pool and clung on to the side, I could see her on the grass. She hadn’t moved and then Ava was at her side. Ava’s face was red with anger and she was saying something to Caitlin. Caitlin didn’t look at her mother but dropped her croquet mallet and began walking away. But when she reached the edge of the pool where I was rested, she took one glance behind her at Ava, then she looked at me, raised her eyebrows an inch, then flung herself in the pool fully clothed.
11 London, July 2009
Two months until the wedding
Preparations for the wedding are in full swing and Caitlin is giving me even more free rein. I wonder if she suspects something, anything. This was just the way things had evolved. I hadn’t set out to betray her. I condoned my actions with the notion that if things were meant to be any different, then they simply would be.
At times, I am riddled with guilt; I am, after all, only human. I had sought more from Caitlin than she had ever been willing to give. And of course, there have been the times when she has not been the best friend she could have been to me and
