I nodded. I thought back to last night, the way I had been pulled into Chuck’s chest, how I had felt his hot breath on my head and his strong arms around me. But no sooner had Ava passed us, he had let go. He told me to stay put and then come out after I had counted to one hundred. I did as he asked. I counted to a hundred. Except, when I left the outhouse, I turned right towards the tennis court instead of left back to my cottage.
But I wasn’t about to talk to Chuck about that just yet. I wanted to share with him what I had discovered in the study at some point.
‘Okay, Chuck. I like you very much too, and I trust you. And, you know, when you go back home, well, I wondered if I could write to you? We don’t have to tell Caitlin – It could be our secret. I know you’re her boyfriend of sorts, but I thought if we wrote, then she wouldn’t have to know, would she?’
Chuck turned his body so it was facing me even more.
‘What do you say?’
Chuck smiled and took my hand. ‘I would like that very much.’
29 London, September 2009
The day of the wedding
Ava is shifting in her seat and begins scouring the room, looking for an escape or looking for Maxwell for support. Or maybe she is looking for Caitlin. Maybe she thought she would be able to hide this person away from everyone, the way she had been trying to hide them away for years.
I raise my hand and the two women walk over to the table. One lady is in her fifties, with short blonde messy hair and wearing a dress for the occasion. A blue A-line with flecks of white through it. I know her name and her face so well. I embrace her.
‘Thanks for coming, Jackie,’ I say.
‘Oh, you’re welcome. I won’t hang around in here, I’ll let you all do your thing. But if you need me, I’ll be in the foyer all right, love?’ Jackie turns to the woman next to her. ‘Is that all right with you, my love?’
The woman Jackie is speaking to nods shyly.
‘I’ll look after her, Jackie,’ I say, and I take her hand and guide her to a seat next to mine. Ava stands up, and I am sure I see her stumble backwards.
‘Sasha, what have you done?’ she whispers. She turns and walks away at a pace.
Suddenly, I hear the sound of a handbell and Veronica, the wedding coordinator, is standing at the front of the room.
‘Would everyone please take their seats for the meal, which will be served imminently.’ Everyone begins to scuttle to their tables. Chuck and Caitlin are on the top table with both of their parents. I realise I don’t have a seat for my guest. I grab Veronica’s attention and within minutes she has organised an extra seat and an extra meal. A few seconds later, Oscar comes back and flops onto the seat opposite me. By now the rest of the table has begun filling up and he doesn’t question the stranger to my right.
‘Sorry about that, babes. It should be sorted now, I think.’ He takes the glass of fizz he had left before and swallows half of it. The food begins to arrive and Oscar falls into a conversation with one of Caitlin’s old school friends and her husband. I hear him laughing loudly and the pair of them seemed amused at everything he has to say.
My guest eats very little and I’m not surprised. I am happy when stacks of brownies arrive on the table. No cake cutting or speeches – Chuck decided against one – and I know I have nothing to say that will appease Caitlin. I begin to feel a sense of relief that it will all be over soon. It’s all quite refreshing. Oscar takes two brownies and smothers them in cream.
A few people begin to leave the table to stretch their legs after the meal, and then Oscar’s phone rings again.
‘I don’t bloody believe it. Babes, sorry, I’ll be back in a mo.’ He rushes out of the room, hugging his phone to his ear. I turn to my guest and smile. She has some brownie crumbs on her chin; I take a napkin and dab them away.
‘I like what you’re wearing,’ I say, gesturing to the purple dress she has on.
‘I chose it,’ she says.
‘I know you did. I was there when you picked it out. You showed me, do you remember?’
She nods, I look up across the room. Caitlin who has been in full social swing is now beginning to look bored, and I can see her scanning the room. She begins to head over to my table. Ava, who has been watching her like a hawk, stands up immediately and follows after her, as though she has been poised ready to do so. She is at Caitlin’s heels as soon as Caitlin makes her way gracefully towards me.
‘I haven’t seen you since the end of the ceremony,’ Caitlin says when she reaches my table. Ava arrives moments behind her, her eyes fleeting between me and my guest.
‘Who’s your little friend?’ Caitlin asks, and I detect a slight laugh in her voice. As though he has sensed something as well, I see Chuck look over from the head table where he had been in deep conversation with Maxwell. Ava is now visibly shaking.
I feel a sense of empowerment; I decide to revel in it for the short time I have it.
‘Ava, why don’t you introduce my guest to Caitlin?’
Caitlin pulls a bemused expression. ‘What are you two in cahoots about?’
‘Sasha, I implore you to stop this charade immediately.’ Ava’s voice wobbles.
‘Mama!’ Caitlin snaps and looks around at Ava. My guest flinches next
