The veil, with its sheer fabric, seemed only to capture the vapor of her breath, which quickly turned cold, pressing cool and wet against her skin and adding to her chill. She’d take it off, but she was afraid that the dark fabric was what kept her from being discovered as she crouched in a doorway.
What had she been thinking?
Yes, she wished for independence, but sitting here now, she wondered if she’d just chosen a slow death.
She sighed. Was she being dramatic again? She wasn’t certain. She’d told Noah she might be able to support herself as a seamstress, but in that fantasy, someone helped her purchase a shop, which wasn’t really independence at all, was it?
Had she been fooling herself?
Likely. Her father certainly would have told her so.
What was more, she’d had a great deal of time to consider Noah’s words, his position, and her feelings. And she’d come to a really difficult conclusion. One that made her head hang in shame.
This whole time, she’d been going on about creating her own future and having a say and all that. She did wish for control. But as much as she wanted that, she wanted something else too.
Something she’d barely allowed herself to acknowledge.
She wanted someone to love her. She’d wanted Noah to love her. And she’d thought…
Tears sprang to her eyes and clogged her throat, but she pushed them back down. She’d made her choices, she wasn’t crying now. In the end, she’d gotten what she’d wanted, to make her own future.
She looked about the doorway. So this was it?
Her heart contracted in her chest. When he’d given her room to breathe and think, she’d thought it was because he’d cared about her. It turned out, however, that he didn’t care at all. She was just an obligation and he hadn’t been giving her space to make choices, he’d just been manipulating her into compliance.
She cradled her head.
And she’d gone and fallen in love with him. Of course she loved a person who didn’t return her love. She’d have loved her father too if he’d given her a shred of affection.
That did make a sob escape her chest.
What was she going to do?
With a sigh, she knew that she had to go back. While she didn’t want to marry a man who didn’t love her, especially one she’d grown to care for so much, she also couldn’t run away from her problems, especially when she hadn’t made a plan.
She’d just have to stand her ground even if she were facing Noah, Ewan, and Bash.
Avery peeked down the street. The question that plagued her now was whether or not to leave the doorway now and try to travel back to Noah’s home in the dark or spend a long, hungry night in the doorway?
But as she looked both ways, she quickly pulled her head back into the shadows as a carriage rumbled slowly down the street.
Another peek and she noted that a man followed the carriage on the back of a horse. And that man was Noah. She recognized him even in the near darkness and her heart leapt into her throat.
He’d come for her.
This time a tear did slide down her cheek.
Because, whatever else she could lament, she did know one thing for certain. With Noah, she would always be safe.
And so she unfolded herself from the doorway and stepped out onto the street.
He stopped, staring at her for just a moment before he swung down from his horse. Without a word, crossed the street, taking her hand in his. “Will you please come back home with me?”
She gave a quick nod. She could hear the difference in his words. So many men would have said. Are you ready to come back home, as though it were a forgone conclusion that she’d fail. They might have even chastised her for her wayward behavior. But not Noah.
If only he could bear some affection for her!
Another tear slipped down her cheek, but they were obscured by the fabric on her face. He handed her into the vehicle and then disappeared.
For a moment she thought he’d ride home, leaving her in the carriage alone, but she heard him tie the animal off and then he climbed inside, snapping the door shut behind him. She sat on the bench facing forward and rather than sitting on the opposite bench, he slid on the seat next to her.
“Have you eaten?” he asked.
She silently shook her head, not trusting her voice. It would surely break if she tried to speak. From his pocket he pulled a bundle of cloth. Unwrapping the contents, he held out cheese and bread.
“We’ll get you more as soon as we’re back.”
She reached for the food but then realized, to eat it, she’d have to pull back the veil and reveal her tears. She hesitated, hungry but not certain she could be any more vulnerable.
Without a word, he reached for the cloth and slowly pulled the sheer fabric off her face. Then, seeing her tears, he swiped at each one, removing them with a gentle stroke of his thumb. “There is so much I wish to say to you.”
She didn’t dare respond as she looked down at the food, hoping he didn’t see the fresh tears.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered into the darkness.
And not knowing what else to do, she buried her face in his shoulder.
He wrapped an arm about her and then lifted her up. She found herself in his lap, settled in his warmth, his arms wrapping about her like a blanket. “I’m sorry too,” she managed in a hiccup. “Leaving was…”
“Brave,” he offered. He pressed his cheek to the top of his head, and she could feel his smile. “But please don’t do it again. You scared me.”
She didn’t respond. What was there to say? She was frightened too. Of her feelings for him, of her future, of her past. How was
