Misalliance

was rather rough on me, though. He told me nobody here liked me; and I was silly enough to believe him. Lord Summerhays And all the women have been kissing you and pitying you ever since to stop your crying, I suppose. Baby! Bentley I did cry. But I always feel good after crying: it relieves my wretched nerves. I feel perfectly jolly now. Lord Summerhays Not at all ashamed of yourself, for instance? Bentley If I started being ashamed of myself I shouldn’t have time for anything else all my life. I say: I feel very fit and spry. Lets all go down and meet the Grand Cham. He goes to the hatstand and takes down his hat. Lord Summerhays Does Mr. Tarleton like to be called the Grand Cham, do you think, Bentley? Bentley Well, he thinks he’s too modest for it. He calls himself Plain John. But you can’t call him that in his own office: besides, it doesn’t suit him: it’s not flamboyant enough. Johnny Flam what? Bentley Flamboyant. Lets go and meet him. He’s telephoned from Guildford to say he’s on the road. The dear old son is always telephoning or telegraphing: he thinks he’s hustling along like anything when he’s only sending unnecessary messages. Lord Summerhays Thank you: I should prefer a quiet afternoon. Bentley Righto. I shan’t press Johnny: he’s had enough of me for one weekend. He goes out through the pavilion into the grounds. Johnny Not a bad idea, that. Lord Summerhays What? Johnny Going to meet the Governor. You know you wouldn’t think it; but the Governor likes Bunny rather. And Bunny is cultivating it. I shouldn’t be surprised if he thought he could squeeze me out one of these days. Lord Summerhays You don’t say so! Young rascal! I want to consult you about him, if you don’t mind. Shall we stroll over to the Gibbet? Bentley is too fast for me as a walking companion; but I should like a short turn. Johnny Rising eagerly, highly flattered. Right you are. That’ll suit me down to the ground. He takes a Panama and stick from the hat stand. Mrs. Tarleton and Hypatia come back just as the two men are going out. Hypatia salutes Summerhays from a distance with an enigmatic lift of her eyelids in his direction and a demure nod before she sits down at the worktable and busies herself with her needle. Mrs. Tarleton, hospitably fussy, goes over to him. Mrs. Tarleton Oh, Lord Summerhays, I didn’t know you were here. Won’t you have some tea? Lord Summerhays No, thank you: I’m not allowed tea. And I’m ashamed to say I’ve knocked over your beautiful punch bowl. You must let me replace it. Mrs. Tarleton Oh, it doesn’t matter: I’m only too glad to be rid of it. The shopman told me it was in the best taste; but when my poor old nurse Martha got cataract, Bunny said it was a merciful provision of Nature to prevent her seeing our china. Lord Summerhays Gravely. That was exceedingly rude of Bentley, Mrs. Tarleton. I hope you told him so. Mrs. Tarleton Oh, bless you! I don’t care what he says; so long as he says it to me and not before visitors. Johnny We’re going out for a stroll, mother. Mrs. Tarleton All right: don’t let us keep you. Never mind about that crock: I’ll get the girl to come and take the pieces away. Recollecting herself. There! I’ve done it again! Johnny Done what? Mrs. Tarleton Called her the girl. You know, Lord Summerhays, its a funny thing; but now I’m getting old, I’m dropping back into all the ways John and I had when we had barely a hundred a year. You should have known me when I was forty! I talked like a duchess; and if Johnny or Hypatia let slip a word that was like old times, I was down on them like anything. And now I’m beginning to do it myself at every turn. Lord Summerhays There comes a time when all that seems to matter so little. Even queens drop the mask when they reach our time of life. Mrs. Tarleton Let you alone for giving a thing a pretty turn! You’re a humbug, you know, Lord Summerhays. John doesn’t know it; and Johnny doesn’t know it; but you and I know it, don’t we? Now that’s something that even you can’t answer; so be off with you for your walk without another word. Lord Summerhays smiles; bows; and goes out through the vestibule door, followed by Johnny. Mrs. Tarleton sits down at the worktable and takes out her darning materials and one of her husband’s socks. Hypatia is at the other side of the table, on her mother’s right. They chat as they work. Hypatia I wonder whether they laugh at us when they are by themselves! Mrs. Tarleton Who? Hypatia Bentley and his father and all the toffs in their set. Mrs. Tarleton Oh, that’s only their way. I used to think that the aristocracy were a nasty sneering lot, and that they were laughing at me and John. They’re always giggling and pretending not to care much about anything. But you get used to it: they’re the same to one another and to everybody. Besides, what does it matter what they think? It’s far worse when they’re civil, because that always means that they want you to lend them money; and you must never do that, Hypatia, because they never pay. How can they? They don’t make anything, you see. Of course, if you can make up your mind to regard it as a gift, that’s different; but then they generally ask you again; and you may as well say no first as last. You needn’t be afraid of the aristocracy, dear: they’re only human creatures like ourselves after all; and you’ll hold your own with them easy enough. Hypatia Oh, I’m not a bit afraid of them, I assure you. Mrs. Tarleton Well, no, not afraid of them, exactly; but you’ve got to