KOW: Yeah. They just…they just shot one of the Burmese. Threw his body overboard. I guess it was a reminder of who's in charge. I…yeah. (Silence) The ferry'll be coming back this way soon. What do you suggest I do?
ED: Stay out of sight, but stay with her.
JIMM: (OFF-CAMERA) I'm sorry. I was…I was a little behind on the translation there. I'm just…yeah. Oh, man. These people are serious. Ed, are you sure Kow should follow the boat?
ED: Yeah. I've got a plan.
14.
The Colors of the Ramho, So Pretty in Disguise
Live Internet feed. 7:55 p.m. Gulf of Thailand
(CLOSE-UP OF JIMM JUREE SWINGS ROUND SLOWLY TO THE DARK SEA)
JIMM: (WHISPERED) We're sitting here with our lights off because the ferry, on its way back to the port after dropping off its slaves, is passing only fifty meters in front of us. We can see the red signal light of Captain Kow in pursuit. We're hoping to catch the skipper by sur-
(SOUND OF THE LOUD CLICK OF THE SPOTLIGHT BEING SWITCHED ON.)
JIMM: Our boat and Captain Kow's have both switched on their full beams. You can now see the little boat quite clearly. My grandad is standing up in the front of our boat beside Bigman Beung in his impressive uniform. I'll translate.
GRANDAD JAH: (OFF-CAMERA) Cut your engine.
(SOUND OF GUNFIRE)
JIMM: That was the sound of Grandad firing his gun over the head of the ferry skipper. At least, I don't think he was trying to hit him. I imagine with the lights and the uniform, this must look like a navy raid of some kind. He's…he's cut his engine sure enough, and he's got his hands in the air. Our own engine kicks up, and we head toward him. Will he reach for a gun when he works out we're nobody official?
BIGMAN BEUNG: (OFF-CAMERA) Keep your hands where we can see them.
JIMM: As we get close, it's obvious that the skipper isn't in any fit state to reach for anything. He's either drunk or drugged. That's Captain Kow you see pulling alongside him. He's tying up his boat and jumping aboard. Well done, Captain. (CLOSE-UP OF CAPTAIN KOW OPENS UP TO TAKE IN THE CAPTURED BOAT) And here it is. The open boat that carried seventeen slaves to the fleet, one of whom was killed right in front of the captain's eyes. I will take you aboard so you can see the cramped conditions under which the Burmese were forced to endure the journey out to the deep ocean. Here. Two narrow wooden benches. Leg irons. The smell of vomit. No food or drink. My grandad is interrogating the prisoner of war. Like many fishermen, he's probably spaced out on amphetamines.
(ZOOM IN ON THE INTERROGATION)
GRANDAD JAH: What's your name, old man?
FERRY SKIPPER: Yeah. Whatever.
GRANDAD JAH: Do you realize that what you've just done is an infringement of international law?
FERRY SKIPPER: You finished? I got a night job to get to.
GRANDAD JAH: You aren't going anywhere, son. You're under arrest.
FERRY SKIPPER: Is that so? I don't see any police. Just old farts and tarts.
GRANDAD JAH: Then you aren't looking hard enough.
(POLICE CAPTAIN WAEW GOES ROUND BEHIND THE SKIPPER AND SNAPS ON HANDCUFFS WHILE GRANDAD MANHANDLES THE PRISONER DOWN ONTO ONE OF THE BENCHES)
FERRY SKIPPER: You can't do this. I've got contacts. I've got a number to call. I'm protected.
GRANDAD JAH: Yeah? Where is it? I'll call it for you.
FERRY SKIPPER: In my shirt pocket.
GRANDAD JAH: Thank you. That'll come in very useful. In court.
(CAMERA ROTATES BACK TO JIMM)
JIMM: So, there you have it. The first victory. We are now three boats. But how do we use this windfall to our advantage? Stay tuned.
'Oh, this is just it, Mair. Just it.'
'It is?'
'Absolutely it. Look at the counter.'
'That's certainly a lot of numbers.'
'We just jumped like some mad thing. We're fifty thousand short of half a million. And they're everywhere. Look at this.'
Sissi dragged her mother to a far computer.
'See this, Mair? This is a stat-counter. It tells you where people are logging in from. Look at this: London, Rio, Cape Town. Look at the figures. We're global.'
'That's nice. But I don't think I'd want her with a bush-man. A nice Englishman would be fine.'
'Mair, this isn't a dating service.'
'I know, but you did promise to make her look thinner.'
'She'll have every man in the world drooling over her. She'll be a celebrity. It doesn't matter what you look like if you're a celebrity.'
Mair looked at her daughter and touched the screen.
'Being a celebrity isn't like being a person,' she said. 'It's just another two-dimensional brick in the entertainment empire. It's temporary. I want her to find someone because she has a good heart.'
'They'll see her heart, don't you worry. Look what she's doing. Heart's about all they're running on out there.'
'Why's he naked?'
'Lady boys don't like being, you know, exposed. They're lost without their queer clothes, and…'
'What psychology book did you get that out of?'
'Everyone knows.'
'Right.'
Lieutenant Egg was standing in the doorway looking down at Chompu, who was handcuffed to the headboard by one wrist. It was a Home Art two-thousand
'And the bruises?' Egg asked.
'He resisted arrest,' said Ben. Socrates sat on his own bed, watching. Both were now dressed in their fake police uniforms.
'You know, normally I'd say that was excessive violence,' said Egg. 'I'd say, 'You have a foe. You have a need to dispense with him. You do it cleanly and without personal animosity. It's a job.' But there are times when the would-be victim rubs you so far up the wrong way, you just want to make it last as long as you can.'
Egg sat on the bed beside Chompu.
'Why didn't you gag him?'
'He hasn't said nothing,' said Ben.
'Probably got a sore throat from all that man juice,' said Socrates.
Egg grabbed Chompu's modesty hand and yanked it away from his organ.
'Well. You're well equipped for a lady boy, aren't you?' said Egg. 'What a waste. And I bet your reporter
