me to her and said, “Only by four minutes but I love you big brother.”
Giving Jade one last hug I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Ashlynn was looking at us and I knew that I had to tell her as soon as possible what all happened to Jade and I a month and a half ago.
Later that night when we got back to the hotel from the reception we both got undressed and snuggled up in bed. We were both lying on our sides and her back was to my front. My arm was draped over her middle and I knew she could feel my heart beating extremely fast. I was just about to say her name when I heard these little purring sounds and knew that my Ashlynn was asleep. Kissing the back of her head I said, “Goodnight babe,” and drifted off to sleep in the comfort of holding Ashlynn to me.
Upon checking out the next morning we made the drive back to our apartments. I dropped Jade off at the apartment but when Ashlynn was getting ready to get out I placed a hand over hers.
She looked at me with sadness in her eyes and I asked, “Could you come over to my apartment for a little while? I just wanted to talk to you about everything.”
I wanted to take the look in her eyes away so badly because she looked like she was just going to burst into tears any second now but she put on a brave face and nodded her head. As soon as I saw Jade walk into their apartment I drove off to mine. The car ride was silent and it gave me time to collect my bearings to inform Ashlynn on what all exactly happened.
Parking the car I left my bags in the trunk and Ashlynn and I walked into my apartment. I was relieved that Neil wasn’t there because I wanted to do this in private. Ashlynn sat down on the sofa and I went to the fridge to get a bottle of water.
I looked over in Ash’s direction and asked, “Ashlynn, do you want a drink?”
In this timid voice she said, “No, Jason.”
Closing the fridge I walked over to the sofa and sat down next to her. Taking a deep breath I explained everything. “That last night in Florida I received a call from my dad. He asked if we could talk and as much as I didn’t want to I figured I might as well just listen to what he had to say. From what I told you before about mine and Jade’s childhood you know it was pretty difficult having to hear his voice and I was emotionally drained after that short conversation. Truthfully, I just didn’t know how to tell you. I wanted to get the future conversation over with before you and I ever started anything because you are extremely important to me, Ashlynn Miller.”
Anyway when we got back to school I called him and he informed that he was dying of cancer. I didn’t know what to say so I just listened to him tell me about how he apologized for everything that he did. How I was nothing like him. He said that I was so much more. He said I was such a better person than him.”
I was still explaining when I felt Ashlynn place her hand on top of mine for comfort and I looked over at her and saw tears falling from her face. I put my other hand to her cheek and used my thumb to wipe away the tears and she gave me a small smile.
Clearing my throat I continued.
“While it was difficult to hear that I knew I had to tell Jade. When I did she pretty much lost it and then informed me that she wanted to see him. She needed to talk to him and come to her own form of closure so that’s what she did. I went with her back to our hometown and was there for her when she talked to our father. I didn’t think seeing him would be all that hard on me but I was wrong. He just looked so fragile and weak and now his outer appearance matched his inner. He apologized profusely to the both of us and asked if we could find it in our hearts to forgive him. He also wanted to be a part of our lives now and be given at attempt to make up for what he did to our childhoods.”
I took a break to let everything seep in with Ashlynn.
A few minutes later she cleared her throat and asked, “What do you want to do Jason?”
I looked over at her and asked, “What do you mean?”
Holding onto my hand she asked, “Do you want to try and build or repair a relationship with your dad?”
Shaking my head I gave her my honest answer. “I don’t know.”
Taking a sip of my bottle of water Ashlynn said, “I’ll be here for you no matter what you choose Jason.”
The only thing I was one-hundred percent positive about was that I would always choose Ashlynn and I told her so.
I got up from the sofa and picked her up in my arms and said, “I’ll always choose you Ash. No matter what,” and then carried her back to my room and closed the door.
That night I showed her just how much I loved her and how deeply I felt about her. I took my time with her, tasting every single bit of her body and touching every part of her I could get my hands on. I had her whimpering and moaning and screaming my name. I had her writhing and coming undone beneath me. There were even a few tears shed and if I had any doubt before telling Ashlynn I knew now that she would be mine forever.
A few hours later we both lay on our sides facing one another and talked into the early morning. Our conversation started with favorite movies, music, and books. We talked about what we both wanted to do over the summer. I got a laugh out of her when I just said, “You.”
Her laugh just did something to me. I loved that I could get that smile on her face and make her eyes twinkle and sparkle and glisten. Our talk then got more serious when she asked about what I wanted to do when it came to starting a relationship with my dad.
Looking deep into her eyes I said, “I don’t know Ashlynn.”
I didn’t even realize I was crying until she placed a hand to my face and wiped the tears away. She leaned into me and slowly kissed my tears away and after making love again Ashlynn nuzzled up to me resting her head on my chest.
Drawing lazy circles on my stomach with her fingers she whispered, “I lost my mom when I was younger and I never got to say goodbye. She was such an amazing person and I just wish that my dad and I were given the chance to say goodbye to her or say I love you one last time, but we didn’t get that option.”
Lifting her head to look at me she said, “But you and Jade do. I’m not saying that you have to say, ‘I love you,’ but I do think that you haven’t found your closure yet with what happened when you were younger. I’m not condoning what he did but I think that sometimes it takes something life threatening like cancer to realize what’s important in life or show you how badly you messed up in yours.”
Biting her lip she said, “I think your dad had to find that out the hard way. Ultimately the choice is yours on what you decide to do, but I just wanted to give you my thoughts on it.”
Getting up on my elbows I wrapped a hand around the back of Ashlynn’s neck and whispered against her lips, “I love you Ashlynn,” and before kissing me she said, “I love you Jason.”
We fell asleep tangled up in one another’s arms but a few hours later I was woken up by Ashlynn jumping up out of bed and running into the bathroom. I quickly put on some boxers in the case that Neil was home and ran in to see Ashlynn’s head was in the toilet and she was throwing up. I knelt down next to her and rubbed her back while she threw up everything and then dry heaved.
Once she was finished emptying everything in her stomach I picked her up and carried her back to my room and laid her down in my bed. I then walked back to the bathroom and flushed the toilet and got a washcloth and ran it under some cold water. As soon as I was walking back to the room to place it on Ashlynn’s head she was running out and towards the bathroom again. This time she closed the door and locked it so I couldn’t get in.
I sat outside and waited for her and a few minutes later she came out and said, “Jason, can you take me home?”
My heart stopped because I didn’t understand why she wanted me to take her back to her apartment but reluctantly I said, “Yeah, I’ll just get some shorts on and take you.”
While she waited for me to get dressed she waved her hands back and forth and said, “It’s just the flu and I don’t want you to get sick.”
She walked up behind me and turned me around. Wrapping her arms around my neck she looked at me smiled and said, “So please stop worrying,” and placed a kiss on my cheek.
Before I dropped her off at the apartment, I stopped at the grocery store and picked up some ginger ale, chicken soup, and a new movie that came out. When I got back in the car she laughed at me and said, “I love you Jason Williams.”
When I parked the car I carried Ashlynn to her apartment. There were people staring but I didn’t care. I just looked at them and said, “The girl I love is sick so give me a break.” I knew Ashlynn’s face was bright red but she hid her face in my neck.
Getting her comfortable in her bed I went back down to the car and carried up her bag from the weekend
